


Pecans

by Nuggsmum



Category: Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-01
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-09-13 06:50:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 51,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16887678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nuggsmum/pseuds/Nuggsmum
Summary: This is a revised/reworked version of my first fic, Walnuts. Its mostly the same, but there are some additional chapters and I fixed the writing a bit lol





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: language/mentions of verbally abusive relationship/threatening of violence/fluffy happenings at Target/slight trash talk about Walmart.

I pulled into a parking spot at Target, wishing that I had gone to the store during lunch like I had intended. It seemed that I could never get away from my desk long enough to do anything useful on my lunch hour. My phone started to go off, playing “Here Comes the Sun” making me jump. I glanced at it, and hit silent.

“Thank God they are open twenty-four hours for the holidays.” I muttered, pulling on my hat and gloves for the short walk to the store. I got out of my car, the air slapping me in the face. It was quarter to midnight on a Wednesday night, and damn, was it cold. As I walked past the back end of my car, I noticed a dent.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Damn it!” I cursed. I noticed a man had gotten out of the car across from mine, and glanced over at my out burst.

_Nice car. A Jaguar. What the hell was someone with a Jag doing in North Central Massachusetts?_ _I wonder how it handles in the snow?_ I thought.

He kept walking towards the store, pulling on a jacket as he went. I followed him. It was too cold to stand and stare at the dent, and staring at the strangers back as I walked behind him seemed a much better sight anyways. He was tall, with sexy shoulders. He looked powerful, but still slim. The kind of guy you wanted to climb like a tree. He carried himself like he had the confidence of a king. And, man, what a suit. I had noticed the excellent fit before he had pulled his coat on. He rubbed his hands together, flipped up his collar and hurried his stride.

_I could warm him up._ I thought. I reminded myself I’d sworn off men. _Remember Rose, men are scum. You don’t need them, no matter how long it’s been…. God he looks good from behind… Hopefully he’s as hot in the front….Stop!_ I silently argued with myself. _This was pathetic, oogling strange men from behind._ I shook my head to clear the naughty thoughts and followed him through the door.

My phone went off again. I stopped to see who it was. John. I hit silent again. I noticed Mr. Sexy Back glance my way.

_I will not look, I will not look. If I don’t look, he can remain ugly in my head and then I won’t be tempted. Yeah, right. Like I could get a man that dresses like a GQ model and drives a Jag. What the heck was he doing here, anyways? Probably on his way to Boston._

I grabbed a carriage and dug out my list. Even though Christmas was in two days, I noticed that the store was pretty dead. _Fine by me._ I had enough people for the day. I had gotten off late from my job as a medical assistant, having stayed to make sure my patients were all set for the holiday. We were closed for the next few days, a nice Christmas bonus from my doctor. I ended up calling a few of my elderly widows and widowers, to make sure they had everything they needed and that made for some long phone calls. They get lonely, and want to talk. I was not in the best of moods, because as much as I loved my Golden Oldies, they had children, and other family. It shouldn’t be the medical assistant with no life from their doctor’s office to call them to check in. To make sure they have food in the fridge.

I had made it to the hair care aisle, and was humming Christmas carols. I may have had a bad day, and hated people at the moment, but I loved Christmas! Even though it was going to be just me and Mitch this year. Mitch was my loyal old hound dog mix, who loved me almost as much as he loved his treats. I had decided to get him a new bone while I was there, and set about opening and smelling some of the bottles, trying to decide on which scent I wanted for my conditioner, when my phone rang again. John. I hesitated. _This has gone on long enough_. I hit the talk button.

“What the hell do you want?” I hissed into the phone, glancing around to make sure I was still alone.

“Hey babe! I missed you.” Came his slurred words.

“John, I’m not your babe anymore, and I wish you would stop calling me. _Are you drunk?_ ” I whispered. I could hear someone in the next aisle, and I didn’t want to be “that” person. Airing your dirty laundry in the middle of the store, I mean, this was Target, not Walmart. Standards, people, standards.

“I drink because you ruined what we had. You became an uppity bitch,” came his belligerent reply.

“I ruined it? John, you screwed my accountant! My accountant for gods sake! I walked in on you two at what was supposed to be my appointment to get my taxes done! You have the gall to say that I ruined things? Besides, I was done with the way you treated me. Get over yourself. It’s been 9 months. Move on. Find some other poor fool to tell your lies to and to treat like crap.“ I said flatly.

“You’re getting mouthy with out me to keep you in check, aren’t you? I should teach you respect your man. After I was done with you, you’d be begging to come back to me.” He sneered, sounding meaner than I had ever heard him.

“Are you threatening me?” I breathed, not believing that this was the man I thought I had loved, even though he had treated me horribly for the majority of the two years we had been together.

“What are you gonna do about it, bitch? I could make you come back to me, make you sorry you ever left. Yeah, real sorry.” He laughed.

“I’m done with this conversation, you need to sober up and think about things. Move on and leave me alone, John.” I hung up the phone. I started to tremble and as hard as I tried to stop them, the tears still fell from my eyes. I had never told anyone about the way John had always spoke to me, partly because I believed that he would never act on it. When we broke up, he stared calling me a lot and sort of threatening me, but it almost seemed halfhearted, like he didn’t really mean it. He was just venting. So I let it go. But over the past few weeks, it had gotten worse. The phone calls were more frequent. Tonight was the first time he had actually threatened to hurt me.

I could hear the person in the next aisle coming around the corner, so I blindly grabbed a conditioner and started to push my cart in the opposite direction. Oh, great. It was Mr. Sexy Back. And from what I could see from my quick glance though tear filled eyes, he was Mr. Sexy Front, too. _Damn it._ I fled the aisle as quick as I could with out looking like a total lunatic. I had a feeling he heard my conversation. He just stood in the aisle and looked after me.

I went to the women’s department, figuring I was safe there and finished wiping my eyes and took a few deep breaths.

_It will be ok._ I though. _He doesn’t know where my new apartment is, and he’s just blowing off steam._

My phone rang. John. I hit silent. I looked around and noticed Mr. Sexy Back was in another aisle near the woman’s section and he glance my way when he heard my ring tone. It rang again and I jumped. I looked at the screen. Dr. M. I answered it, breathing a sigh of relief.

“Hey Dr. M, what’s up?” I said, trying to steady my voice.

He had some questions about a patient that I sent in prescriptions for before I left, the pharmacy had called for clarification on one. I told him about one of the widowers I had spoken with before I left, and that I ended up going to the store to get him some food and dropped it off to him. I had ended up staying and chatting with him for a few hours. “It’s ridiculous, he has a daughter the lives two towns over. How can she live with herself, not making sure her father has food in the house?”

“Rose, you do too much sometimes. I mean, I appreciate it, but you have to separate work and life.“ He scolded me.

“I know, I know! I just get so attached to them, I can’t help it but to make sure they are ok. His wife would have been thankful that someone thought of him, besides, I changed the bandage on his foot, so we can bill for it.” I joked.

We spoke for a few more minutes as I strolled towards the baking aisle.

Finishing the call, I hung up the phone and it rang again. John. I hit silent and groaned. _This was getting ridiculous._ I heard someone behind me and noticed out of the corner of my eye it was Mr. Sexy Back again. I turned in the baking aisle and he followed. I looked at my list. Pecans. I looked at the nut section, it was pretty sparse. There was one bag left. It was way more than I needed, but as it was the only one, I grabbed it. Meanwhile, Mr. Sexy Back had gotten closer and was perusing the nut section as well. I could only just smell his cologne and he smelled so damn good. I closed my eyes and inhaled.

_God, I’m pathetic._ I chided myself. I heard him sigh. My eyes snapped open and I looked at him. He was gorgeous. _Dear god alive._

I looked at him and muttered, “That was quite a heavy sigh for the baking aisle. This is a happy place, a place where cookies come from. Your negativity is not appreciated.“ I was immediately mortified at my attempt of a joke. He turned to look at me and a small smile lifted the corner of his mouth.

“Pecans. They're out of pecans. The one thing I came in for.” He said in the sexiest British accent I had ever heard. I literally had to focus on closing my mouth, it was hanging open.

“I-I-I have nuts,” I stammered. I inwardly cringed, knowing I sounded like an idiot. He smiled fully at me, and Jesus Lord Almighty. The man was a God.

“Do you now? You seem like you’re all woman to me, but who am I to judge.” He smirked, looking me up and down, making my skin prickle and heat up. _Those eyes! Oh. My. God._ I shook my head, clearing it of the cobwebs that get there when it’s been far too long since you’ve had great, or even mediocre sex, or any at all for that matter, and narrowed my eyes at him.

“I have the last bag of pecans. Would you like to split it with me?” I questioned him, feeling proud of myself for recovering so quickly. He smiled at me, a big boyish grin.

“That would be fantastic!” He exclaimed. _Well, I just made his night now, didn’t I?_ As we stood there and looked at each other, my phone went off.

I reached for it and he snapped “Don’t you dare answer that phone if it’s him.” I looked at him in shock. He had heard my conversation. His face had changed from the boyish smile to rigid stone within a split second.

“I wasn’t planning on it.” I answered, warily stepping behind my cart. He watched me make this maneuver and looked pained.

“I'm sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come out that way. I didn’t mean to scare you. Christ, you’ve had enough of that, haven’t you? I couldn’t help hearing you earlier, and it seemed that wherever I went in the store, you were there. I swear, I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop. I heard you speaking to your doctor. You sound like you’re a good person. I cannot stand men who treat women in the way that man treated you. I know it’s not my business, but you can’t go back to him. He doesn’t deserve you.” His blue eyes bore into mine. _Damn. He's incredible._

“I-I-I left him months ago, and he’s been basically stalking me. He was always an asshole, and now he’s threatening me. I’m scared that he may plan to hurt me, and I don’t know what to do.” I blurted out, hating how defenseless I sounded. _Why am I telling this absolute stranger this?_ It seemed that now the verbal floodgates were open, I was going to just tell this man everything that crossed my mind.

“I don’t even know you, yet I’m telling you this, you must think I’m insane.” I looked down, avoiding his penetrating gaze.

“I don’t know you, but I feel like I’ve met you before, in another life perhaps.” He murmured. I looked up at him, and he looked pensive. "I have this urge to protect you, like you are mine and it’s my duty. Now you must think I’m mad.” He breathed. I could see the sincerity in his eyes.

Who was this man, who made me feel safe? I did feel safe, I noticed that since our strange conversation started, I hadn’t had that feeling of needing to look behind me. I felt calm. Calm, but extremely turned on. This man really was a God.

“Maybe we should start this over and introduce ourselves first.” I said, trying to sound like my heart wasn’t hammering in my throat. “My name is Rose.” I said, looking down again, because let’s face it, I felt like a moron.

“My name is Tom, and it's my pleasure to meet you, Rose.” He said, as he took my hand and kissed my knuckles. I glanced up at him. _Dear reader, I almost swooned. Yes, you heard me, swooned._ He held my hand for what was way too long for my senses to handle, staring into my eyes. “Would you like to get a drink with me, Rose?” He murmured, rubbing his thumb along the back of my hand. I felt my knees go weak.

“I would, b-b-but that wouldn’t be wise because...” I stammered. _Good lord, make him stop staring at me with those unnerving eyes._ I felt as though I would have an orgasm just looking at him.

“And that would be because…..” He trailed off, waiting for me to finish the sentence.

“Because I’ve sworn off men. In case you can’t tell.” I muttered, looking away.

He reached out his hand, gently grasping my chin, “That is not a man.” He growled, looking fierce. “You deserve someone who will treat you like the queen you are, as all women should be treated. Any poor excuse for a man who treats a woman the way he treated you should be taken out back and beaten.” I stared up into his beautiful face, wondering if I was dreaming.

_That’s it, it must be a dream._ I thought, willing myself to stay asleep. I reached out and touched his cheek. It felt real. I shook my head and stepped back, wondering where this crazy conversation was headed.

“So, Rose. How about that drink.” He purred. I looked up at him. _God, he was tall._

“I don’t really feel like a drink…. it’s been a long day.” I said, bewitched by the boyish smile that sprang to his mouth at my statement.

“Really? I don’t really either, it just seemed like the only way to keep you with me so late at night. Are there any late night coffee shops around here?.” He asked.

“Do you even know where you are? You are in the middle of nowhere!“ I squeaked. “The only reason this store is open is because Christmas is in two days. Things around here close at nine, normally.” He pondered that for a moment, looking around.

“You know, I don’t know where I am, I just got off the highway because I saw the Target sign…. And I had a feeling I had to stop here….So, what are we to do then?” He asked, smiling at me like the Cheshire Cat.

“Uhh. I have to finish shopping and get home. Mitch will miss me if I’m gone much longer, I would love to have a coffee or something but I really don’t think it’s a good idea, I have to make a lot of cookies, and then….” I trailed off, realizing I was rambling.

“Ok, can I finish shopping with you then?” He asked, smiling at my awkwardness.

“It’s a free country.” I replied, instantly hating myself. _Why would you say that?_

He laughed and said “Yes, yes it is, isn’t it?” He followed me to the pet section where I proceeded to grab one of those huge bones that can’t fit through a door way.

“Do you have a dog or a dinosaur?” Tom asked, eyeing the giant bone.

“Oh, Mitch is about the size of a small horse, but he thinks he’s a lap dog.” I laughed.

“Ah, so Mitch is your dog. I was wondering who would miss you if you stayed out too late.” He smiled at me and winked. I literally thought I would die.

How was I going to get away from this charming man? And did I even want to? _He had to be insane, right? I mean, who tried to pick you up at Target in the middle of the night besides a crazy man who wanted to chop you to bits with an ax?_


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/violence (I promise it will be ok…)

  
“So, how late will Mitch let you stay out?” He asked, as he looked at the dog toys. He grabbed one that looked like a piece of pizza and squeezed it, making it squeak. He threw it in the cart, smiling at me.

“I need to get home soon. He’s been cooped up all day, and he needs to be walked.” I said, secretly happy that he looked disappointed. His eyes were tracing my lips as I spoke and it was distracting me, making my pulse jump. _God, if just looking at him makes me feel this way…..Ok, crazy girl, you need to back up here and calm down, and maybe a cold shower wouldn’t hurt. Yes, definitely a cold shower when I get home._

I looked over at him, wondering if I was absolutely insane for wanting him. _If I invited him to my apartment, would he come? Would he have his wicked way with me? Would he kill me in my sleep?! Did I care if it meant I could get into those gloriously tailored trousers?_ As I was debating the pros and cons of being murdered by such a specimen of gorgeousness, my phone went off. My eyes flew to Tom’s face. He clenched his teeth shut, and I noticed a muscle ticking in his cheek. I hit the silent button and half-heartedly smiled at him.

“I don’t suppose you would let me speak to the little worm, would you?” He asked, deceivingly calm. His amazing eyes were like blue electric storms, pounding into mine with such intensity that I practically lost my breath.

“What’s the point? He’ll eventually get over it and leave me alone. He’s just acting out because he thinks I left him for no good reason…” I stopped mid-excuse at the look on Tom’s face. He wasn’t buying it.

“So,” he drawled, deftly changing the subject, “What else do we need?” I stared at him as he proceeded to get behind my cart and push it down the aisle. _God, I could get used to shopping with him,_ I thought, following him, staring at his broad shoulders.

“I need to get a scarf and a few baskets. Oh, and some ribbon. Really, you don’t need to finish shopping with me.” I looked at him, hoping he would tell me he did need to finish shopping with me. There was something about him. Something that made me feel all weak and giddy. Something that made me want to run like a woman possessed into his arms and never, ever leave. I was insane.

“And how would I get the nuts you so kindly promised to share with me?” He asked, smiling that megawatt grin.

I was struck dumb for a second and made a noise that sounded like 'ppppffffttttbbb'. He just kept walking. I had to practically run to keep up with him. My phone went off again. It was sitting on top of my purse in the cart, he grabbed it and answered.

“Do yourself a favor and leave the lady alone.” He said it in a surprisingly friendly voice, given the look of hard steel in his eyes. He hung up the phone before John could say a word. “So sorry, Love. Couldn’t be helped,” he said, and leaned over, his lips settling near my ear. “Next time I won’t be as nice. He really needs to stop with this foolishness.” He walked away, pointing to the next aisle, saying, “I believe the baskets are over here?”

While searching through the baskets, he asked me if I like to read.

“A little bit.” I said, smiling at him. “Do you?” I asked him.

“A little bit.” He said, sarcastically, winking. “What about classics? Or are you a science fiction groupie?”

“Oh, I dabble in the classics.” I said evasively, not knowing how to tell this man I could open my own bookshop.

“Dabble. I see. In the spirit of the season, what is your favorite Christmas song and movie?” He asked.  
“Hmm. That’s a tough one.“ I said, as I thought about what my favorites were. "Well, I think I have a few for different reasons. Favorite church Christmas song is Silent Night. Because when I was younger, we would go to midnight mass and they would turn all the lights off and sing it, just the candles lit… it was beautiful. Favorite older Christmas song… White Christmas by the Drifters, it makes me laugh. Favorite newer Christmas song… Last Christmas by Wham! I guess it gives me hope that you can move on, even at Christmas.” I was staring at my hands, feeling embarrassed; like I had shared too much with this stranger, who, felt like he was quickly becoming less of a stranger.

“Movies?” He prompted, gently breaking my reverie.

“Miracle on 34th Street, Love Actually, Holiday Inn, I think White Christmas gets too much credit, even though I do like White Christmas, too. Besides, Fred Astaire’s drunk dance? Perfection!” I declared. “And yours?” I asked him, wondering how he could possibly be interested in this drivel.

“The Snowman with David Bowie and We Wish You a Merry Christmas,” he said right away.

“I’ve never seen that, but I loved Bowie,” I said. “I’ll have to find it and watch it sometime.”

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye and said, “We can watch it together.”

I swallowed and took a deep breath, getting ready to say something about how that wouldn’t be happening, and he changed the subject again, asking about my work. We spoke of that and he mentioned that he traveled a lot for work.

“What do you do?” I asked him. He stared at me for a long moment, then said “I don’t mean to come off as full of myself, but you truly have no idea who I am, do you?” I looked at him, taking in his hair cut, his suit, _dear God alive, he was fine_ , and had a vague feeling that I had seen him before.

"I feel like I’ve met you somewhere. Oh, I know. You’re a doctor, right? Have I seen you at one of those conferences Dr. M drags me to?” He laughed at that, and started to walk down the aisle again. I stood and stared after him. He had the cutest laugh, kind of like “ehehehehehe.” _Adorable man. Stop it right now, Rose. Do not get attached to him, this cannot work!_ I scolded myself.

We managed to find everything I needed, and made our way over to the register. The kid that was working started, doing a double take when he saw Tom. “Duuuuuuude! Are you…” Tom held up a hand, silencing him.

“Just put it all on one bill, please.” Tom cut him off. I looked from one to the other, the kid looking like Christmas had been taking away, and Tom smiling at him and shaking his head.

“Oh, no. No, no, no. Nope. This is mine, this is his. Separate please. You can buy Mitch the pizza.” I said primly. Tom looked at me with a mixture of exasperation and some other heated emotion I really tried not to read into. But really wanted to. Multiple times. All. Night. Long.

As the kid was ringing up our things, he kept staring at Tom, almost worshipfully. _Maybe he was gay? I mean, I’m having a hard time not staring at him, too. Just look at him._

Tom was talking to him, asking him questions. His name was Derek, he was in college. His major was in biology. He kept calling Tom “Sir.” As I was tucking my card and receipt away, I glanced over and noticed Tom writing something on his receipt, and handing it back to the kid. He looked like Christmas had been given back. “Duuuuude! You are the best! Uh, Sir.” Tom just smiled, and headed towards the door with me.

“What the heck was that about?” I asked.

“Oh, nothing. So, what shall we do now?” He asked, his eyes sparkling.

“Listen, Tom, it’s been really nice, er… amazing really, meeting you. You seem like a real nice guy, and part of me would love to spend the ni- ah… more time with you.” I was babbling again. We had reached my car. As I opened the hatch, he moved closer and put his finger to my lips, effectively stopping my verbal blubbering and making my heart leap out of my chest and do the Charleston at the same time.

_Holy mother of god, he smells so good,_ I thought. _I'm going to die. Just die right here in the Target parking lot and I’m okay with it._

“Rose, love. I have no intention of leaving you tonight. Let me be perfectly honest and tell you, this is not me. This is so not me, it’s not even funny. I don’t usually go to a store in the middle of the night, listen in on the private conversations of a complete stranger, and then meddle in her affairs. I got off the highway because I wanted some pecans. Then I stumbled onto you. Now I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach. That if I let you slip through my fingers, as you keep trying to do, I’m, no. _We’re_. We're going to miss something so special, we would never forgive ourselves.” He ran his hand up my arm, and I felt it through the layers of clothing like they weren’t even there.

“I’m drawn to you, Rose. I want you so badly, even after just knowing you for an hour. My God, the things I want to do to you. I want feel you beneath me, your legs wrapped around me. I want to hear you scream my name.” He whispered. “And, yet, I want to protect you more than anything. It’s like you have imprinted on my soul, and now that I’ve met you, I could never live with myself if I didn’t act on this. I-” He had been speaking so quickly, with such an intense passion, that I literally had become weak in the knees.

He had to grab my waist to steady me and was leaning in, his eyes fluttering shut. I could feel the body heat radiating off of him. I reached up to grab his suit jacket, mostly because I needed to steady myself, but let’s face it, also because I wanted to feel that fabric. I grasped it and breathed his name. “Tom. I don’t know…”

He hushed me, and leaned in more. I closed my eyes. All of a sudden his heat was ripped away from me and I felt cold, the coldest I had ever felt, like my very soul had been torn from me. I heard a grunt as my eyes flew open. I screamed when I realized what was happening.

It was John.

He had charged at Tom, who was now lying on the ground. I couldn’t tell if he was hurt. John whipped around towards me and pushed me up against my car. “You fucking whore! Who the fuck is that?” He yelled into my face. His breath stank of whiskey. I tried to turn away from him.

I whimpered as he grabbed my hair and pulled me to the side, towards his truck, that I somehow hadn’t noticed before. He threw me up against the truck, my left temple connecting with the side mirror. I saw stars, and felt as if the ground was moving under my feet. John grabbed my arm roughly as he tried to push me in to the truck, all the while he was yelling at me.

“You fucking slut! So you’re just fucking every guy you meet now? I’ll teach you. I’ll fucking teach you! You need to be put back in your fucking place, you god damned who-”. His tirade was cut off by a fist to his jaw. My arm was forcefully removed from John’s grasp, and I fell to the ground, my hands skidding across the pavement. I heard the knees of my scrub pants rip and felt the asphalt slice into my legs. My hands and knees were stinging as I scuttled around like a damn crab, trying to get out of the way of the brawling men. I tried to focus on what was happening, but I was seeing double, and couldn’t tell who was hitting who.

I heard three quick thuds, and saw John go down like a sack of potatoes. Tom was on his knees in front of me in an instant, gently grabbing my shoulders.

“Darling, are you ok? Rose! Speak to me.” He said urgently.

“God, there’s two of you… that’s not fair, I can barely resist one…Aw, your beautiful forehead has a cut…you smell so good… I need to bring the roast.” I incoherently managed to mumble before I passed out in his arms.

 


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: language/panic attack

“Rose. Rose! Girl, if you don’t wake up, I’m gonna slap you so hard, that curly mess of hair on top your head is gonna go straight.” My eyes felt like they had weights on them. I tried to open them, but they were so heavy. _And why was it so bright?_

“Can you turn down the sun?” I groaned.

“There you go, Sweetheart. Come on, come back to Martha.”

“Martha?” I croaked. “What?” I slowly opened my eyes. I was laying in the back of an ambulance. Martha, a paramedic, who I had known for years and happened to be my best friend, was looking at me with a mixture of worry and amusement in her large brown eyes.

“Girl, what kind of mess you got yourself into now?” She drawled, chuckling.

“Oh, God! Is Tom ok?” I tried to sit up. “Shit, my head.” I flopped back down on the stretcher.

“Honey Bunny, he’s fine, in more ways than one, mmm-hmm. But you wanna explain to me why I had to have Doug forcibly remove Tom Hiddleston from the back of my bus? He was beside himself. Bleeding all over the damn place and wouldn’t let me treat his cut. I tell you, I'm getting too old for this shit. We got here first, Sargent Slowpoke took forever, as usual. He’s giving his statement now. What the hell is going on?” She stared at me, her eyebrows raised.

“Hiddleston… huh. That’s his last name?” I felt like I knew him from somewhere, but just couldn’t wrap my head around it.

“You need to start from the beginning, Baby Doll. Momma needs some answers. I was called out of my nice warm station at this God forsaken hour to an assault call. I show up to find you, passed out in the arms of Tom Fucking Hiddleston, who is bleeding from his glorious forehead, all over the place, did I mention that? Then there is your piece of shit ex-boyfriend. On the ground. Hog tied with Christmas ribbon. Even for you, this is a bit much.” She looked at me over her glasses as she was writing something on a form. 

“John has been kind of stalking me. Calling me a lot, saying things. He was drunk, and he attacked us when we left the store, I don’t kno-” I was trying to explain to her, when there was a banging on the doors of the ambulance. Martha eyeballed me for a moment, then leaned over and opened the doors.

“Don’t make me call Doug over here again.” She said to Tom, shaking her finger at him. I stared at him, standing there, looking amazing, holding a wad of gauze to his forehead. Doug was Martha’s police officer husband, who I could see over by my car, looking at something on the ground. It was John, and he was indeed tied up with the ribbon I had just bought in the store. Tom followed my gaze, turned back to me and a small smile lifted the corner of his mouth. I gave him a little smile in return, trying to convey my thanks.

“You gonna let me take a look at you now? Or we can just let that pretty face of yours have a big ole scar if you want.” Martha barked at him, snapping us out of the moment.

“I do apologize, I just wanted Rose to be cared for first. Her injuries are much worse than mine. Please, forgive my rude behavior.“ Tom said, turning his charm on. Martha was immune it seemed.

“Mmmhhmm. Get up in here and close that door. Letting out my heat, like he was raised in a barn. What your momma would say, just standing there in the doorway.” She muttered, turning to reach for her bandage kit.

Tom obeyed, climbing gracefully up into the ambulance, and sitting by my knee on the stretcher. Martha stopped what she was doing to stare at him.

“There’s a seat over here.” She said, pointing next to her on the bench.

Tom looked at me and said to Martha, “I need to be here.” Simple as that. It really did make me feel a little better, having him near. I could feel the black edge of panic starting to set in. The realization that if he hadn’t been there to save me, I might have been seriously hurt or worse, was really coming to the front of my brain. I felt as though I was watching everything through thick glass, and the conversation was muted. Tom took my hand and gently, avoiding the scratches, rubbed the back of it with his thumb.

Martha stared him down for a full minute. She then tsked, and said, “Hey, Mr. Mischief . You need to look over here for me to fix up your face.” But she was smiling slightly as she said it. Like she was starting to warm to him.

“Anything for you, Martha.” He said solemnly, obediently turning his face. She pulled back the gauze and it didn’t look to bad at all. Head wounds tend to bleed like crazy, even if they are mild. She flushed it with some saline, put a little triple antibiotic on it, and slapped a steri-strip on it.

“You’ll be fine, just keep it clean.” She said, all business as usual when it came to care instructions. “You, on the other hand, Little Miss, I think we should take you to the Emergency Room for observation. You took a hit, and have a nasty egg to prove it. Now, Doug will be wanting a statement, but he can do that there.” She stated, like there was no other option.

“No, I’m fine.” I tried to sit up again, but Tom gently put his hand on my shoulder, pushing me back down. I looked at Martha saying “Really. No, really, Martha! I’m fine. I know the signs to look for, and I would be much better off at home. Where I can get some sleep and peace and quite. You know how it is at the ER! Plus Mitch needs to go out!” I begged.

Martha looked like she would argue with me, when Tom cut her off saying “I will take excellent care of her, she will be pampered in every way possible.”

Martha looked at me, saying “It’s up to you, Sweetness. I can’t make you go. But you know my opinion on the matter, I would feel better if we can do a scan to make sure you don’t have an internal bleed.”

“I really just want to go home. Please. I’m fine, really. It’s been an extremely long day.” I pleaded. Martha opened the door and waved Doug over. I noticed that John was gone. _Thank God. If I never see him again, it will be too soon._ Doug ambled over to the back door and leaned in.

“Quite the night, eh, Rosie?” He chuckled. He cleared his throat at a look from Martha. “John is going to be charged with multiple offenses, not limited to attempted kidnaping and attempted murder. He had a gun and a shovel in his truck, Rosie. Why didn’t you tell us he had been stalking you all this time?” He asked, switching from good natured cop to concerned fatherly figure. I felt like I had let him down. Doug and Martha were at least 20 years older than me. Sometimes they were like surrogate parents. It didn’t stop them from being some of my favorite people.

“I dunno, I just thought he would get tired of it.” I muttered, picking at my scarf, not meeting any of their eyes. I felt ashamed that he had gotten away with treating me that way for so long. I felt weak for not being able to save myself. I felt like a horrible person, what if Tom had gotten really hurt trying to defend me? I looked to Doug, pleading silently with him to get this over and done with quickly. He seemed to understand, the questions being short and to the point. Martha have me instructions on caring for the scrapes and bruises, told me to ice the egg on my head, and instructed Tom on what to watch out for.

“Nausea, vomiting, dizziness, change in vision. Any if those things, you bring her to the ER. Make sure she takes it easy.” She said as we climbed out of the back of the ambulance. “I think you should be fine for tomorrow afternoon, you’re bringing the roast, right? Norma talked me into making my cornbread, like I have time for that!” She leaned out the back and planted a kiss on my cheek. “Nothing too strenuous, if you get my drift, Lover Boy.” She shot Tom a look. She cackled after us.

“Oh, and Mr. Hiddleston?“ She call out as we were walking away. “If you harm so much as a hair on my precious girl’s head, I will cut you.” She said pleasantly.

Tom stopped after helping me into my coat and turned towards Martha, with the most sincere look on his face said “Martha, my dear, if I ever harm a single hair on her head, I will buy you the knife.” He turned back around, gently put his arm around my waist and said “Come along darling, let’s get you home.”

Tom drove my car, leaving his at Target. I told him my address and he punched it into the navigation system on his phone. I sat and stared out the window, wondering how I could ever apologize for what had happened. I felt like he should despise me, that he should have left me to the care of my friends and run, perhaps screaming, in the other direction. Instead, he kept murmuring soothing words, while rubbing his hand up and down my thigh. He kept throwing anxious glances at me, asking if I felt like I would be sick or was I dizzy. I mostly made noncommittal noises in response, it took too much effort to think of words to say.

We pulled into the long drive leading to my apartment.

“You live here?” He asked, sounding impressed as he took in the beautiful white washed Victorian mansion and its expansive grounds.  
“Oh, no. I live in what used to be the carriage house. It’s out back, behind the modern garage. The owners give me a good deal, because they’re gone a lot and I water their plants when they are gone. They go to Florida in the winter.” I explained.

He pulled up alongside the carriage house and put the car in park. He jumped out of the car and walked swiftly to my door, holding it open and grasping my hand to help me out. “Milady.” He smiled. I gave him a small smile, that he returned with interest. He led me to the door, and as I unlocked it, I could feel his gaze on the side of my face. I turned to look at him, and he looked so angry, I took a step back.

“No, no, no, no, darling. I’m sorry, I was thinking about that bastard and what he could have done to you. What he had planned to do. Thank God I was there. Please, please don’t ever be frightened of me. I will never hurt you, I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” I muttered, pushing the door open and heading to the stairs. The downstairs section held relics of years gone by. Old cars, furniture, toys, trunks of clothes, you name it. The big open floor plan had been collecting treasures for almost 100 years, since the “modern” garage had been built. We climbed the beautifully carved staircase towards my apartment.

“This is pretty impressive for what probably used to be servers quarters.” He said, running his hand lovingly along the oak banister. _God, I wish he would touch me that way_ I thought. _Stop it, Rose._

I unlocked the frosted glass door on the upper landing, pushing the door open. Immediately, a giant, black, fluffy monster bounded out of the kitchen.

“Mitch! Hi baby!” I said, as I reached down to scratch his head. He whimpered in response. “I have to walk him. He’s been home alone all day.” I said as I reached for his leash. Tom didn’t say a word, just grabbed the leash and clipped it to Mitch’s collar. Mitch started to pull him toward the stairs.

“Go take a nice hot bath or a shower, I will be right back. Give me the keys, and lock the door. That’s a girl.” He said as I handed him the keys. I shut the door behind me and leaned on it. This was the most absolutely insane night of my life. It was like I was watching from a distance. It didn’t feel real.

I headed from the kitchen and walked through my cozy living room, then down the hall towards my bedroom. I could feel that black edge creeping in again. The panic was starting to come back. I told myself to calm down, that I was safe and Tom was just outside with Mitch. _Tom._ How had he become so important to me in just a few short hours? How could just the thought of his name being me relief from the inescapable panic attack that was slowly working it’s way into my brain.

I turned on the shower, all the way up. Skin searing hot. I stripped out of my scrubs, wincing as I had to pull the fabric of my pants out of the cuts on my knees. _I loved those pants. Another reason to hate that bastard._ I stepped into the shower, letting the boiling water wash over me. I leaned against the cool tile wall, staring into space, not really seeing anything. I tried to fight it. It was inevitable. The last thing I thought before I let the panic take me over completely, was at least Tom can’t see what a mess I am. A sob escaped my lips as I slid down the wall to sit on the floor of the shower. I pulled my legs up and rested my head on them, hugging them to my body, as if I could roll into a ball and hide from this fear. My body was shaking uncontrollably.

Tom knocked gently on the door and said “Rose, love, are you alright? You’ve been in there quite a while.” When I didn’t respond, he tried the door, which I had locked. He knocked again, more insistently, calling my name. Somewhere beneath the gripping panic, part of me reveled in the sound of his voice, calling my name. “Rose, I’m sorry darling, but I’m going to break the door if you don’t answer me right now….” He called, sounding very anxious.

I tried to respond, but all that came out was a pitiful sob. There was a loud bang as the door flew open, and Tom came barreling into the bathroom, Mitch hot on his heels. He stood and took in what was going on for a second, breathing heavily from his exertions. He quickly took off his suit jacket, kicked off his shoes and came over to the shower. He opened the door and stepped in. He sat on the floor next to me and pulled me onto his lap, shushing and rocking me. He sat there and held me for what seemed like hours, his hand rubbing my back, pushing my streaming hair off my face. Speaking kind, gentle and soothing words in a low voice.

“It’s ok darling. I’ve got you. No one will hurt you again. Deep breaths, Love. Shhhh.” Eventually my sobs quieted and he stood, taking me with him as he exited the shower. He pulled a fluffy towel around my body, kissing me on the nose, so gently, if I hadn’t been cried out, I may have cried.

He proceeded to strip off his wet clothes and toss them into the shower, pulling another towel around his waist. I was completely exhausted and could barely move a muscle, but good lord almighty. _What a sight._  
He picked me up and walked down the hall to my bedroom. I didn’t have the strength to protest. He sat me on the edge of my bed and took a towel to dry my hair.

“Your hair smells lovely.” He murmured as he finished. He got up and walked over to my dresser, saying “Pardon me, Love, I’m going to pillage your drawers…” and turned a cheeky smile on me. I managed a small smile in return.

He opened and closed several drawers, poking through the clothes. He ended up finding what he wanted the third drawer down. A large, beat up, old tee shirt that was my favorite sleep shirt. He pulled it over my head, and gently pushed me back into the pillows, pulling the covers up. Mitch climbed up and lay on my feet.

“Shall I read to you until you fall asleep, love?” He asked, poking through the stack of books on my bedside table.

“You don’t have to. You’ve been so nice, and you must think I’m insane…Please don’t feel like you need to stay here. I’m such a mess….“I trailed off, suddenly feeling self conscious. He looked at me, his eyebrow raised.

“Nonsense, darling. I already told you earlier, I have no intention of leaving you now that I’ve found you. Tonight was a nightmare, and you’ve held up amazingly well. You're strong, Rose. Stronger than you give yourself credit for, I think. Sometimes you can only take so much before you can’t process any more. I want you to try to get some sleep. I'll be right here.” He climbed into the bed next to me, and pulled me close.

I immediately began to drift to sleep. I had never felt more secure in my whole life. It was like I had finally come home.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Nightmares/ language/ fluff

_I was hurrying down a wooded path. Fog swirled all around me, making it hard to see where I was going. I heard loud footsteps, as if someone was running after me. I turned to see who it was, and saw only a wall of fog. As I began to move faster, so did the footsteps. Every time I stopped to turn around, the footsteps ceased and there was no one there._

_I felt something wet brush across my hand._

_“What the fuck was that?” I yelled, pulling my hand away from it and flailing my arms out in front of me. I tried to run, but something was weighing down my legs._   
_“Please, just let me go, please!” I pleaded. I kicked out, connecting whatever had grabbed me and I heard a yelp._

From all around me, a low, calming voice broke though my panic.

_“Darling, wake up. It’s only a dream. Just a dream, Sweet. Wake up, Rose.”_

I started awake, sitting straight up, realizing that the weight I felt in my dream had been Mitch, who was still laying on my feet. Cowering, but still there. _What a good, loyal dog._

“Oh, Mitch, baby, I’m sorry!” I cried, reaching out to him. He climbed up to my lap and snuggled into a ball. A ball the size of a boulder, but somehow, he managed. I slowly turned to look at Tom. I couldn’t believe he was still there. _God damnit._ He looked amazing with his hair having dried all curly the night before. He was sitting against the headboard, looking at me with concern in his eyes.

“How’s the head, love?” He asked. He reached out and touched my cheek gently. I stared at him, trying to compute what he had said. _How is it possible that this man, this incredibly sexy man, was in my bed?_ I felt like the events of the night before had been a bad dream. I started to run over everything in my mind. Then I remembered the shower. _Oh god. The fucking shower. This glorious man held me, sobbing, in my shower while I had a complete mental break. Oh, for fuck’s sake._ My hand flew to my mouth as I gasped.

“Oh God, oh God, oh God. I am so sorry. Jesus, I can’t even begin to apologize for everything…For last night, for John, for being a complete wreck.” I stopped to take a breath, and gasped again. “Oh God, you saw me naked! Oh God…..” If the ground could have just opened up and swallowed me whole, I would have died happy. He smiled at me, the corners of his eyes crinkling up.

“First thing, darling. Don’t ever apologize for what that bastard did. Which you keep doing, by the way. I am so thankful that I was there. I’ve been thinking about it all night. What could have happened had I not gotten off the highway and all this,” He gestured between the two of us., “Hadn’t happened? Don’t be sorry for that. Ever. Case closed, the end, thank you, have a good day. As for being a wreck, you deserved to be. I’m frankly a little concerned that you’re not more of a mess. You were assaulted by someone that you obviously trusted, at one point anyways. That fucks with a person’s mind. You’re doing pretty well considering. And yes. I did see you naked. I’m not sorry about it, either. I didn’t really look. Too much, anyways. It wasn’t the time for it. However, in fairness, you saw me naked, as well.” He ended, with a cheeky grin.

I buried my face in Mitch’s gleaming, fluffy black coat. _This was insane. Who is this man?_ I still didn’t understand how this happened. _Wait…._

“Who are you, really? Martha knew you. She knew your last name. Actually, she called you Tom Fucking Hiddleston, like I should know you. When she said it, it sounded vaguely familiar. Are you a politician or something? An author? Is that where I’ve seen you, on the back of a book? A mass murderer? You’ve been in the papers?” I managed to peek at him through Mitch’s fluffy mane. He smiled at me for a moment.

“Martha called me that, did she?“ He chuckled. “I like her, she’s real. I’m not going to lie, I sort of enjoy the fact that you don’t know who I am. It’s a nice change. To you, I’m just Tom, the guy who tried to pick you up in the baking aisle at Target. To the rest of the world, I’m Tom Hiddleston, the actor.” He said, watching my reaction. I looked up at him. I knew I must have seen him in something, but I’m not much for tv. I gestured to the large bookcases covering three walls of my bedroom.

“I don’t own a TV.” I said sheepishly. “Martha always tells me to get out of the 18th century and join the living, but books are like movies to me. Not that I haven’t seen movies. I’m not that weird.” I babbled on. _Please just shut up. You’re showing him how socially awkward you are!!!_

“I was looking at those last night while you were sleeping. You have quite the collection. I hope you don’t mind, I borrowed one of your Shakespeare’s” He said, holding up a leather bound copy of his sonnets.

“Of course not. So…” I trailed off, not knowing what to say to him. I looked at the clock, it was five past ten.

"Oh no!” I cried as I jumped out of the bed like a drunk ninja, falling over the side in a tangle of bed clothes. “I need to make cookies and get that damn roast in the oven, like 10 minutes ago! Damnit. I’m so sorry, I have to get this done now… do you want me call you a cab, or I can give you a ride after if you want….what?” I asked, noticing his eyes had widened.

"Are you trying to get rid of me?” He said with a small smile. “I will go if you want me to. There is an old etiquette rule, Victorian, I think, that says the duty of a rejected suitor is that he shall accept the lady’s decision as final and will retire from the field. And while I have no right to demand reason for your refusal, I would hope that it's not because you feel like you don’t deserve happiness. Or at least to try for it. Besides, I would much rather stay and help you.” He said, leaning over the side of the bed, because, I was still in a heap on the floor. I stared up at him, my mouth opening and closing.

"You? You want to help me make cookies? Where did you come from?” I was in disbelief.

"Westminster, actually. Lovely place.” He said as he hopped off the bed and padded towards the bathroom. Without a stitch of clothing. _Jaw, let me introduce you to the floor, I have a feeling you’re about to become good friends._ He went in and shut the door. I was still staring at said door, when it popped back open and he peaked his head out.

"Do you have a washer/dryer? My suit is in a sad state and I can’t really wear it right now.” He said, smiling at me, still on the floor. 

"Uhhh. I do, but I doubt that thing can go in a washer. Or a dryer. But wait!” I jumped up and ran out the door to my spare room. I started digging through the closet and found a sweatshirt and some track bottoms.

"I hope those don’t belong to the Worm?” Tom said, right behind me. I gulped and turned around. He was still naked. _Ack! Look up, look up, woman! Mayday, mayday, mayday! Oh my God, stop staring at it!_ I screamed in my head. Or maybe out loud, because he started to chuckle. I forced my head to snap up, meeting his amused smile.

"No, they’re my brother’s. Sometimes he crashes here when he’s in town for work. I think they’ll be loose, but the length should work. I- ahh, I don’t want you to leave, if you don’t want to, that is. I don’t know why you seem so keen to stick around, but-” Tom cut me off by leaning in and gently brushing his lips over mine. He gripped my arms at the elbows and pulled me in, deepening the kiss. His hand skimmed up my arm and cradled my head, pulling me even closer. He sighed and leaned back, looking saddened.

"What?” I asked. _Oh my God he thought it was bad. He looks like he thought it was bad. And it was AH-FUCKING-MAZING! Dear God, if you love me at all. Lightning. Me. Now. Just end it._

"Rose, darling, how long do you think Martha’s instruction of “nothing too strenuous” is valid for? She scares me a little, and I wouldn’t want to make her upset.“ He said, then winked, a smile pulling at his lips.  
I stared at him. I had a thought.

“You could ask her later, if you’d like….don’t feel like you have to say yes to this, but, we are having a little get together, if you want to come? Martha and Doug will be there.” I held my breath, praying he would say yes, because even though I had been trying to resist him since we met, I didn’t want to. I really, really, really didn’t want him to leave. I just knew if he did, I would never see him again.

"I was hoping I would get invited to wherever the prodigal roast was going. I would be delighted to go.” He said. He leaned in and kissed me on the forehead, making a noise in his throat, almost like a groan. Like he wanted to do more than just kiss me on the forehead. A lot more. I was a puddle of goo on my spare bedroom’s carpet.

He turned and headed to the door, looking over his shoulder as he said, “Shall I meet you in the kitchen, then?” He chuckled when he noticed where my eyes were trained. I snapped my eyes back to his and nodded, sheepishly.

I hurried down the hall towards the kitchen. My kitchen was my favorite room in my apartment. Bright and welcoming, with hawthorn yellow walls over white wainscoting. The brown counters had golden flecks that reflected the yellow walls. Just the right size for an avid home cook. I pulled out a pan and grabbed the roast out the fridge. I put it on the counter and headed into the pantry to get the special spice rub I had gotten. I came back into the kitchen to find Tom, leaning against the counter, looking deliciously disheveled. I smiled at him.

"Would you like a cup of tea, darling? I make a mean cup of tea. ” He proudly boasted. “Or do you prefer coffee?”

"I drink coffee at work, but tea at home. Is that weird?” I asked, as I rubbed the spices into the roast. It smelled like Christmas.

Tom was staring, as if mesmerized by what my hands were doing to the roast. He cleared his throat, and headed to the pantry, murmuring, “No, not at all, dear.”

"I only have tea bags. They are in the sunflower container. Left side, third shelf? I think?” I called out to him. I covered the roast and slid it into the oven.

Tom returned with mugs and tea bags. “Kettle?” He inquired.

"Cabinet above the stove.” I said as I ventured back into the pantry to get the ingredients for the cookies. It was odd, but nice, being so domestic with him. _I shouldn’t get used to this_. _Don’t get your hopes up._ I scolded myself. _But wait a minute. Why the hell shouldn’t I get my hopes up. It’s about damn time something good came along for me. And you know what, Negative Nancy? I’m going to grab on. With both hands. Fuck it._

I came back out of the pantry with a new mindset. I was going to stop resisting, stop putting myself down, and see where this was headed. Well, I was going to try. Old habits die hard.

"I need to walk Mitch real quick and grab the pecans from my car. Would you mind measuring out the dry ingredients?” I asked as I handed him a note card with the recipe.

"Gladly.” He smiled. But instead of starting on his task, he wrapped his long arms around my waist, trailing a finger along the side of my head that had hit John’s truck last night. His eyes looked darker, and he took a deep breath and leaned in and kissed me again.

_Good lord, I could do this all day. What party? Forget about it. I’m busy._ I thought, joyously. _Cookies and the roast can wait!_

He pulled back and resumed trailing his fingers along my temple. “You’ve got quite the bruise there, darling. It makes me sick to see your beautiful face this way. Will your friends be upset to see it? I know Martha and Doug will know why it’s there, but will you share with the rest of them what happened?”

"Oh, they will already know about it from Martha. Besides, they are all expert interrogators. They would have it out of me within minutes. What are you going to wear? I can try to clean your suit, but I think it’s dry clean only, and I would hate to ruin it. I don’t think any of Andrew’s dress clothes that are here would fit you.” Again with the babbling. I do that when I’m nervous. _And him being this close made me nervous, well more excited. But a nervous kind of excited._

"How about I take Mitch for the walk, and if you don’t mind, I’ll take your car quickly back to Target. I have a bag in the car. What are you wearing?” He asked, tracing circles on my back with his long, capable fingers.

"Oh, just clothes.” I sighed. I cleared my throat, realizing I sounded like a moron and clarified. “A sweater and a nice pair of jeans. Riding boots. Casual.” He planted a kiss on my nose. Grabbing my keys off the counter, he headed towards the door, calling Mitch as he went. Mitch came trotting down the hall, halting at Tom’s feet and sitting. Tom clipped the leash on him and they headed out the door.

I leaned against the counter, pulling the cup of tea he had made me across to my side. I took a sip. Heaven. The man could make a good brew. I sighed and closed my eyes. I didn’t want to wake up from this dream. He just kept getting more and more unreal. Even my dog liked him. Mitch didn’t like men, usually. He had hated John. I heard the door open, and turned around. Tom poked his head in and tossed me the bag of pecans.

"Be right back, love. Save me some pecans, ok?” He asked, smiling that boyish grin that made my toes curl.

_Fuck me, if his smile can do that, imagine what the rest of him could do. Ok, focus, Rose. Cookies._ I scolded myself, as I set about measuring the ingredients.


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m going to leave the warning from the original -cuz it makes me laugh: Warnings: Usual warning of super fluff ahead…. and there are some dirty bits ahead. :::ducks behind computer, blushing and giggling like a school girl:::: (Oh, how innocent I once was….)

 I threw the last of the cookies on the cooling rack. The roast was well on its way to becoming pure deliciousness. My kitchen smelled amazing. I quickly wiped down the counters, then hurried to my bedroom. I made the bed as the shower warmed up. I stepped into the shower, marveling at the difference in my mindset from last time I had been in there. I washed my hair and applied conditioner, letting it sit as I put my foot up on the bench and started to shave my leg. _Better to be prepared,_ I thought with a grin. I began to sing Silent Night. I was just finishing the second leg when Tom entered the bathroom.

“You have a beautiful voice. Do you sing often?“ Tom asked. I whipped around, trying to cover myself, thanking God for the steamed up glass.

“Tom!” I squeaked. “Ah- Usually when I’m alone in the shower.” I said awkwardly.

“Ah, so not when you have a friend in the shower with you?” He said as he opened the door. He was eating one of the cookies, naked as the day he was born. He looked down at the cookie and sheepishly smiled. “These are really good, I couldn’t resist the smell when I came back. Mitch enjoys car rides, doesn’t he? He’s a really good dog.” He said conversationally as he stepped into the shower. I just stood there in disbelief. I tried really hard to keep my eyes up. _He’s just talking away about cookies and my dog, like it’s not odd at all that he just commandeered my shower. Sure, come on in. The water’s fine. Oh, dear God, would you look at him, water just running right down…._ my eyes followed the water…. _Oh my. Ahem._ My eyes snapped back up to his. He offered me the last bite of cookie, with a sly grin. I mutely shook my head.

“Ah, you’re missing out, darling. You’re a really good baker. Or at least cookie maker. I’d have to sample more of your wares, to make sure you were a good baker. Purely scientific research, of course.“ He smiled as he popped the rest of the cookie into his mouth. “I once did a thing with Cookie Monster. Poor fellow. I think I understand him on a deeper level than most people. It’s so hard to resist a good cookie.” His voice dropped as he moved closer, backing me up against the wall, so that we both were under the shower head. He was standing so close, but not touching me at all. The anticipation was killing me.

“Here, let’s finish rinsing out your hair,” he murmured. He turned me around and began to run his fingers through my hair, getting out the last of the conditioner. It was hypnotizing, the feel of his hands on my head and in my hair. He began rubbing his hands up and down my arms, trailing them down my back and settling them on my hips. He turned me around to face him. _Jesus, he was amazing._ I started to giggle when I looked at his face. I couldn’t help it. He had chocolate smudged at the corner of his mouth. He looked like an overgrown child. It was too cute. He had started to rub his hands up and down my arms again, pulling me closer.

"And what is so funny?” He asked lowly, waggling his eyebrows at me.

“You’ve got some chocolate…” I reached up on my tip toes and kissed the chocolate away. “Right there.” I finished, pulling back to look at his face, biting my lip nervously. I could feel his desire against my stomach. Hard and insistent. I’m not naïve enough not to know that it doesn’t take much for men to get excited, but I believed he truly wanted me. Me.

“Rose, what time do we have to be at this party?” He asked, his voice strained.

“Uhm, it starts at 3. And we have to pick up Norma and Sarah. But they live together and it’s on the way to the General’s house. Why, what time is it now?” I asked, taken aback by the suddenly normal conversation. He sort of growled, leaned down and kissed me, hard. I could feel his barely leashed passion behind that kiss. My back pressed into the cool tile, I wasn’t sure which caused the shiver that ran up my spine. _Good lord, I want this man so much. Please, God, Santa, whoever is listening. This is what I want for Christmas! Bow, no bow. I don’t care! Though if there was a bow, I could remove it with my teeth…._ When he pulled away, I was a little disorientated, falling forward slightly. He grinned at me.

“It’s almost two. I don’t have the time to do what I want to do with you, do to you, right now, and I always do things properly. Our first time isn’t going to be rushed. Not at all. I want to have unlimited time with you.” He dropped his gaze to my lips and leaned in once more to nibble them gently, eliciting a soft moan from me. “Oh, my darling Rose. We are going to have fun later.”

He winked at me and reached for the soap and began to wash. I didn’t want to leave him, but I had to get ready. I hadn’t realized what time it was. I reluctantly stepped out of the shower, quickly wrapped in a towel and went into my bedroom. I felt a tingling in my stomach as I looked at the bed. Would we be there, together, later? I could just imagine him moving over me, his muscles straining in his arms….

"You poor, sad, deprived girl. Focus and get your head out of the gutter.” I mumbled to myself.

“Having naughty thoughts, love?” I heard from the doorway. I peeked over my shoulder, and there he was in all his glory… well with a towel wrapped around it, anyways.

“I should have known. You’re always there when I do something embarrassing. How is that, when we have known each other for less than 24 hours…. Oh, when I say it like that, it makes me feel kind of wrong. I’m really not that kind of girl, as cliché as that sounds. I’ve never met someone and taken them home. Not that that’s what happened! I didn’t mean that I took you home!” _Babbling, Rose, babbling._

“I think that our situation is slightly different than, say, if we had met at the pub. You can’t go through something like what happened last night and not bond with someone. To risk sounding like a romantic fool, I think that we were meant to meet. It’s almost like our souls are old friends. I feel like myself when I’m around you. As for the embarrassing things, please don’t ever stop. I find them endearing. And entertaining.” He came across the room and pulled a bag off the floor and opened it on the bed. He pulled out a pair of black jeans and a dark blue sweater.

I made myself turn around and head into the walk in closet. I grabbed my favorite cream colored sweater off the shelf and a pair of jeans out of a drawer. I went back into the bedroom to see that Tom was not there. I padded over to my dresser. and pulled out a matching bra and panty set, because, well, might as well be prepared, right? I hurried back to the bathroom and looked in the mirror for the first time since last night. I had been avoiding it, because it hurt, which meant it must be ugly. I knew it was going to be bad, but I hadn’t expected this. The whole upper left side of my face was an angry purple. It started at my cheekbone and went up to the hairline and back into the hair behind my ear. My ear was even bruised! I didn’t think that was possible. I was studying my purple ear when Tom reappeared. He stood in the doorway, looking like a statue. A gorgeous statue. An angry, gorgeous statue. He came to stand behind me. I looked at him in the mirror, watching him watching me. He looked so pissed.

“I don’t think that I have any make up that will cover this.” I joked. He didn’t look amused. I started to brush out my hair. As I was doing my hair, he just stood behind me, watching me in the mirror.

“I noticed you have a lot of romance novels on your shelves. What’s your favorite?” He asked, as he leaned down and began kissing the back of my neck.

“Uhm, ah, I-I think that my favorite of all time would be, oh my, that’s nice.” I closed my eyes and focused on what he was doing with his tongue to my ear.

“Your favorite of all time…?” He prompted, nuzzling behind said ear. _Good lord, this man literally drove me to distraction. Like I actually lost my thought. Out the damn window. Oh god. That is nice._

“Jane Eyre. I’ve read it so many times, I could recite it, I think. I love the classics, Jane Austen, of course. But I have a secret love for paperback romance novels, like bodice rippers.” I giggled after I said that phrase. _I cannot believe I told this beautiful man that I loved to read smut novels_. “Some of them are actually quite good. I love Julia Quinn. She's amazing. Hers aren’t really bodice rippers, more a romance with dirty parts.”

“I really enjoyed Jane Eyre. Way before it’s time.“ He murmured, running his fingers along the edge of my towel at the top of my back. I tried to focus and put on some eye liner and mascara. A little eye shadow. I skipped foundation because, well, it wouldn’t make a difference. No more than I do on a normal day. 

“I’ll go walk Mitch quickly, shall I?” He asked.

“Oh, that would be great, thanks! He is coming with us, the General adores him, but its about a half hour ride, and we have to stop to pick up the twins.”

“Twins and a General. You have some interesting friends, I think.” He smiled at me as he headed out of the bathroom.

“You have no idea.” I chuckled to myself. I finished getting dressed, and pulled on my old brown, knee high riding boots. They were so comfortable, so worn, they were like a second skin. I went back to my spare room for the presents that were sitting on the bed in a tote bag. I grabbed the baskets and the scarf I had purchased the night before, placing the scarf in a gift bag. I had a thought and dug around in the closet, finding what I was looking for and placing that in a gift bag as well. Tom came back in with Mitch, who was carrying a large rock in his mouth.

“I didn’t have the heart to take it away. Big guy was so proud of himself.” He laughed. “Oh, its ok. He has a rock garden under the bed in here. I used to throw them back outside, but he would whine at the door until I let him out to get it again. I gave up. Can you hold this for me?” I asked, holding out one of the baskets.

“Of course.” He said, grabbing the basket. I pulled a pink patterned patchwork cover out of a bag and pulled it over the basket. “That’s, uh, interesting.” He said. Clearly he had no idea what it was.

“You’ll see, it will make sense later.” I smiled at him. _He is too damn cute. I cant even._ We repeated the process with the remaining basket, with a purple patterned patchwork cover. I placed the baskets in the tote with all the other gifts and handed it to Tom to put in the car. I went into the kitchen and packed the cookies into a box and transferred the roast into a large crock pot. Tom brought those down to the car as well. I was pulling on my coat and scarf when Tom came back in the kitchen. His cheeks were red from the cold. He wrapped his arms around me and put his forehead to mine.

“Excuse my rudeness, Miss Rose. I never asked you if you minded if I spend Christmas with you. I just assumed that you feel the same pull that I do. I really hope that you are feeling this, I don’t know, this thing between us, like I am. I think that we could be amazing together. Look at how quickly we fell into domestic bliss together. I know that in a few days, I will have to go back to filming, and you will have to go back to work, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t make this work, does it? Please tell me that you're willing to try this?” I looked up into his eyes, so blue, so earnest. I could have lived in them. They were life. I thought about what he had just said. It was true, how quickly we became comfortable with each other, and it just seemed, right. I nodded. He grinned at me, leaned down and tenderly kissed the corner of my lips.

“Lets go celebrate Christmas Eve.” He said, pulling me out the door.

“I can’t wait to meet your twins, what are their names again? Norma and Sophie?” We were in the car, Mitch was in the cargo part in the back. He was bouncing up and down. _He really does love the car_ , I thought.

“Norma and Sarah. You’ll like them. They’re very…original. The General will like you as soon as he hears you talk. His wife, Bess, she passed away 3 years ago. She was from England. He keeps saying he’s going to go over there, just so he can hear her accent again. I’m not sure which part of England she was from though, London, maybe? Her accent sounded a bit different than yours. She was lovely, though. One of the most amazing women I have ever met. They were so in love. It was heartbreaking when she died. She was so sick. He was a wreck. We all were. That’s actually when the G.O. Christmas Eve Party started, a few months after she passed.” I said

“The G.O. Christmas Eve Party? What does G.O. stand for?” I just smiled and said, “You’ll see.” I pulled up to a small, red ranch house with window boxes and a bright yellow door. The front door flew open and a tiny elderly woman stood there. She had on a bright red sweater with a blinking Christmas tree emblazoned on the front. She had a tiger striped Santa hat on.

“Goodness, Rosie! I didn’t think you were coming! Its not like you to be late! I was worried you got into an accident, or you forgot us! Teddy called looking for you.” She called as she came down the ramp. Behind her came an identical tiny elderly woman, but she had a candy cane on her bright green sweater, and her hat was leopard print.

“Oh, hush Sarah! Rosie would never forget us!” Norma called, rolling her eyes at her sister. “She thinks if someone is five minutes late that the worst has happened. Or they’ve been abducted by aliens or some such nonsense. Oh, look at your face, child! Of course Martha called me this morning to tell me what happened. No offense, my dear, but I never cared for him anyways. He didn’t treat you like the gift that you are. He was such a prick. Oh, well then. Who do we have here?” Norma said, just noticing Tom, stand by the back door with it open.

“Norma, Sarah, this is Tom Hiddleston. Tom, my very good friends, Norma and Sarah LeBlanc.”

He took each of their hands in turn and put his lips to their knuckles, and said “Ladies, the pleasure is mine.” They tittered and batted their eyes at him. He helped Sarah in the car, then came around and helped Norma in.

"By the way, dear, I thought you were brilliant as Loki. That character had spunk, job well done.” Norma said as she got in the car.

Once their walkers were packed in, he leaned into me, smiling, and said “G.O. stands for?”

“Golden Oldies.” I said, biting my lip, trying not to laugh.

“Ah. Well. After her compliment to my acting skills, Norma pinched my bottom. This is going to be a fun night.“ He grinned. 


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/ Old people talking about sex (Yeah, you read that correctly.)

 

As we pulled out of their driveway, Sarah leaned forward and touched Tom’s hair.

“Oh, Norma! It’s just like Teddy’s hair, so soft. Feel it! It’s the wrong color, though. Do you know Teddy, young man? The General does. He served with him in the war. He should be home soon. Are you taking our Rosie to the prom? She’s been a good girl, I think father will let her go, and I’ll make her dress for her. I think she will look lovely in navy blue. I have just the fabric, came from China. ” Sarah rambled.

“Jesus, Sarah, stop molesting the poor kid.” Norma scolded, though she smiled at her with obvious affection.

I looked at Tom out of the corner of my eye and whispered, “She has dementia. Teddy was their brother, he died in World War II. He did serve with the General, though. And you don’t have to take me to prom.” I laughed, though deep down, part of me really wanted to go to prom with him. Tom turned in his seat and smiled at Sarah.

“I never had the honor to meet your brother, Miss Sarah. He must be a very brave man. And I agree, Rosie will look ravishing in navy blue. Are you a seamstress?” He leaned his head further back towards her because she was touching his hair again. _Oh my ever loving God. Could he be any more perfect? Seriously, just strike me dead right now, because I don’t want my image of this man to ever change._ I thought to myself, smiling as I listened to the two of them.

We pulled up to an old, blue colonial house, with large oak trees in the front yard. I parked the car by the front door and hopped out to help Norma out of the back, while Tom attended to Sarah.

“Teddy, when you come to pick up Rosie for the prom, make sure you bring her a corsage. I think yellow roses would look really nice with her navy blue dress. What do you think?” Sarah asked Tom.

“Yellow does look nice with blue, doesn’t it? What about daisies? It’s more original. Like Rose. Besides, no rose can compare to our Rosie.” He said, winking at me over his shoulder. _That was so damn cheesy, why am I dying? Oh my god, this man is really going to be the death of me!_

Norma grabbed my hand, and leaned into me whispering, “Jesus Christ, Rosie. You need to tell me what the hell is going on here! That’s Tom Hiddleston, for fuck’s sake! And he’s talking with my senile sister about taking you to prom. They are discussing fucking corsages! And him coming to a G. O. Party! I’ve seen a lot of shit in my day, but this is definitely a top 10. How did you find him? He’s so good with her. If I’d been born with a soul, I might have cried when he let her play with his hair!” She cackled. I looked at Tom, who was leading Sarah up the walk. She was chatting animatedly and he seemed to hanging on her every word.

“He sort of found me. And I didn’t know who he was when we met. He was there when John attacked me. Norma, I think he may have saved my life.” I started to choke up as I said that, thinking about how I might have died the night before, and this man, who it was turning out, was amazing inside and out, had protected me, and seemed to want me.

Norma patted my hand and said, “It’s ok, Lovey. We’ll talk about this later, but how the hell could you not know who he was? He’s been all over the place in the past few years. Such a looker, too. You and those damn books.” She mumbled, as she grabbed her walker and headed over to Doug, who had come down the walk towards her. She kissed his cheek and headed towards the house. Doug said hello, and grabbed the roast and the cookies out of the back. I let Mitch out of the back and he ran up to the house, barking happily. Tom came back and helped me with the rest of the bags.

“What a sweet woman. Sad that she can’t remember things, but maybe she’s happier for it. Norma is fantastic as well. She’s like that crazy aunt that scares the crap out of you, but you think she’s fabulous anyways.” He laughed.

“I love them. Norma takes such good care of her. Sarah’s been getting worse in the past few months. Dementia can be very frustrating. Not just to the caretakers, but to the person that has it as well. Imagine not knowing anyone, or that some of your family members are no longer alive, or that you are 87, not 18. And some days, having such clarity, it’s almost as if nothing is the matter with you. It’s really tough for Norma, and that woman has steel in her veins, but they are in their late 80s. She refuses to put her in a home, and she’s her primary caretaker. We all try to help as much as we can, but there is only so much you can do… What?” I asked, because he was staring at me with a goofy grin on his face.

“Rose, you really are an incredible woman, do you realize that? You have so much love for these people. You have a very big heart, it’s refreshing to see someone who really cares about other people. Someone who’s there for people who don’t have anyone.“ He reached up and tucked an errant curl behind my ear. “You really are lovely.” He whispered as he leaned down and kissed me gently. His hands had made their way to the small of my back and were tracing slow circles. He ran his hand down, brushing it across my bottom, pulling me even closer.

“Rosie, is that octopus bothering you? I’ll go get my gun if you want.” Barked a man from the porch. You could tell that he was advanced in years, but there was still a vitality to him. He positively exuded energy.

I laughed a little and called out, “No, that’s alright, General. Thank you for the offer, though.”

“Well you keep it in mind. You just say the word, my dear.” He turned his sharp eyes on Tom, who looked more than a little uncomfortable, but still kept his arms wrapped around me. “As for you, come here and let me shake your hand, young man. I want to thank you for saving our Rosie last night. She’s the light of day to a lot of us old timers, and we’d have been lost with out her constant interference.” He chuckle as he shook Tom’s hand vigorously.

“Yes, sir, she is an amazing woman. I did what anyone else would have done, I hope. I’m just glad I was there.” Tom said modestly.

“Nonsense, Doug told me you dislocated that punk’s jaw. Good man. Coulda used men like you back on the front lines. Come inside and have a drink. You like whiskey?” He asked as he turned about and limped into the house.

I called out after him, “You’re not supposed to be drinking that! I’m telling Doc!”

“Oh, for crying out loud! It’s Christmas, Rosie!” He barked back at me, waving his hand, dismissing my comment.

Tom looked at me and shrugged, grinning. He grabbed the bags from me and followed the General inside. I shook my head and went in after them. I stopped in the hallway, looked into the living room and saw the General introducing Tom to some of the G. O. Members. Sarah was already ensconced on the sofa with a blanket across her knees and Mitch laying beside her with his head on her lap. Doug was shaking Tom’s hand and slapping him on the back.

“You should have seen it, fellas! He hog tied the bastard with Christmas ribbon! Stuffed a dog toy in his mouth, too! Best part was, every time he tried to talk, it squeaked!“ Doug regaled, to the laughter of the others. Also in the living room were three elderly men, Phil, Stewart and David. They were all laughing and shaking Tom’s hand as well. He looked slightly embarrassed, but pleased with himself. I caught his eye and smiled. He grinned back.

I headed down the hall to the kitchen, where Martha was commanding the ship. She already had Norma shelling peas at the table along with May, and she was stirring a large pot on the stove. Over at the island, Irene and Peggy were putting the finishing touches on some pies. The women all stopped and looked at me when I came in the door, smiling at me. Irene and Peggy came over to me and hugged me, fussing about my face and telling me old home remedies that they swore would get rid of the bruise.

“Mmhmm, but Miss Thing over there won’t be wanting to smell like liver and fish oil from that paste you talking about, Irene. Not when she’s entertaining that dashing, young Englishman.” Martha said with a smirk. I gave her a look, but I tried to just laugh it off. The girls all laughed at her comment.

“It’s nice to see you too, Martha. I’m feeling much better, thanks for asking.” I shot sarcastically at her. She blew me a kiss.

"Listen, Rosie. There’s nothing wrong with having a good man to warm your sheets!” May chuckled from the table. Norma gave her a smile. “After Bob died in the war, I was only 24. You can bet your boots I had a few good sheet warmers that would come from time to time.”

“Come being the key word!” Cackled Peggy. I opened and closed my mouth, trying to think of something to say to that.

“Oh, there was this one. He was a mechanic. Girls, you should have seen the arms on this man. I wish I had a picture of him. He was so handsome. He was a widower, his wife died in childbirth. Boy, could he go all night long. He used to do this thing, where he would take my leg and-” Martha cut of her reverie.

“Ladies, lets not scar the poor child, who thinks that anyone older than 40 doesn’t know what S-E-X means. Lord. I could tell you about last weekend at my house, but it would curl that hair of yours even more!” Martha laughed, stirring her pot. _Don’t picture it. Do not picture it. Oh god. I’m picturing it!_

“Rosie, can you put these in the oven?” Asked Peggy, gesturing to the pies. She moved over to the table to grab the peas, and handed them to Martha. I grabbed the three pies and put them in the preheated oven.

“We are just about ready, just waiting on the potatoes, and the peas. Everything else is done.” Martha said. As she passed by me to the dining room, she gave me a peck on the cheek. I followed her.

“How you doing, Honey? More importantly, how was he?” She giggled. Martha actually giggled. She was moving around the table, filling the glasses with water. I began taking the silverware out of the box on the sideboard, setting each place.

I stared at her in disbelief for a minute and said, loftily, “I wouldn’t know. Doctors orders to not do anything strenuous, if you remember.”

“Oh, Sweetness! You listened to me? I was just being an asshole! I can’t believe you listened to me. You missed out on a golden opportunity, woman!”

“Well, he listened to you. I think you scare him a bit, actually.” I laughed.

“Me? But I’m a fucking delight! What’s to be scared of?” She finished filling the water glasses.

“You can be, I don’t know, strong, I guess. If someone doesn’t know you, that may be intimidating. But he did say he liked you, that you’re “real”. I said, finishing the settings. I grabbed the empty bread bowl to bring in the kitchen.

“Fancy that. Hiddleston thinks I’m real. Well, go grab Norma and May, and then tell the boys we are almost ready, they can guide in Miss Sarah.” I did her bidding. She’s such a mother hen, she was in her glory when she was bossing people around. Even if most of them were at least 30 years older than her. She loved our G. O. parties, and all the members. We had formed our own little group, and I spent most of the holidays with them, my family being pretty scattered. I headed towards the living room, but stopped in the hallway when I heard the General say my name.

“She’s not the kind of girl that you can wine and dine and take out parking, if you know what I mean, boy. She’s a true lady. Rosie deserves to have a good man. I like you, I think you are a decent, honest man. I’m just saying that I don’t know how your lifestyle is going to fit with hers. I know this is jumping the gun, but she’s been through the wringer, that one, and we feel that is our duty to protect her. I want to know that your intentions towards her are true, and your not going to use her and leave her tomorrow. Because I may be an old man, but I’ll kill you. And these other old bastards will help me do it. See Stewart over there? He used to be a mortician. He knows how to make things look like an accident.” There was a chorus of “Here ,here!” from the others, and a chuckle from Stewart.

Doug interjected and said "I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that, General. Listen, Tom, you know what he’s getting at. Were not saying we’re gonna chase you to the church with a shot gun. Rosie’s a big girl, and she can make her own choices, but we just want to make sure you understand. She isn’t like those Hollywood women. She’s a good kid, she’s got a big heart, and I think she’s starting to fall for you, buddy. Just be careful with her. Or I’ll have to arrest all these old coots for attempted murder.“ I was feeling so many emotions at once. Touched, embarrassed, pissed, amused.

Tom cleared his throat and said, "Guys, I really appreciate how much you obviously care for Rose. I know that we haven’t known each other that long-”

I didn’t want to hear what he was going to say and I didn’t want them to know I had heard their conversation. I went back into the dining room, as Irene was coming in with the roast on a platter. I went over to Peggy and asked her to go get the guys. I handed the bread bowl to Irene. I sat down in my seat, and hoped that my face didn’t display my conflicted emotions. If anything, embarrassment was winning out. He would run, screaming for the hills, as soon as this night was over.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/Meddling old folks/angst/fluff/  
> Oh. And Smut.

 

“Rosie is pregnant.” Sarah declared. There had been a slight buzz of conversation as everyone was passing serving dishes back and forth. Twelve heads whipped around to face Sarah, after she made the pronouncement. You could have heard a pin drop.

“Sarah, that’s not true!” I squeaked.

“Of course not darling, you’d have to get laid for that to happen. You’re not the bloody Virgin Mary.” Norma said, with a wink. _Fuck my life,_ I thought, wanting to sink into the floor. Everyone laughed and went back to eating and the chatting resumed among neighbors.

I was sitting in between Tom and David. Sarah was on the other side of David. I leaned forward so I could see her. She smiled at me and said, “You’re going to be a great mother Rosie. Teddy will be home soon. He’ll be so happy. Have you written to him, or will you tell him when he returns? I’m so happy I’ll be an auntie. Don’t worry, I can babysit for you after school, Mother said so.”

David patted her arm and smiled at me, and said quietly, “Just go with it, dear. Best not to burst the bubble, so to speak.” I could feel Tom looking at me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I moved the food around on my plate, having lost my appetite between the conversation I had overheard earlier and Sarah’s overactive imagination.

Tom cleared his throat quietly, and moved his hand over to my leg. He began to run his hand up and down on my thigh, in a comforting motion. I managed a peak at him and he gave me a small, sweet smile.

“Eh, how’s the roast?“ I asked him stupidly.

“Oh, it’s really delicious, love. Everything is. You don’t seem to be enjoying your meal?” He said quietly.

“I think I’m just worn out from the past 24 hours.” I muttered.

“Yes, I would imagine you are. Perhaps a walk after dinner?” He suggested. “The General was saying he wanted to have a fire, but hadn’t been able to get firewood. I’m sure we could find some in the woods out back?“

“Yes!” Said May and Stewart in unison. They were seated across from us.

“That sounds like an excellent idea!” Declared May. Stewart nodded enthusiastically.

“So, you want to join us, then?” I asked, knowing full well what they were up to.

“Oh, no, my legs…you know how bad my legs are, Rosie!” Exclaimed May, while Stewart nodded in agreement again.

“Meddling old people, leave the kids alone. I’m sure poor Tom has already had enough of us to last him a lifetime. But it would be nice if you’d go get some wood! It’s not Christmas Eve without a fire!” Said the General. “Always had a fire when Bess was here. She would have gone out and got the wood herself if I couldn’t have.”

“I think Rosie will indeed be getting the wood.” Muttered Norma, with a twinkle in her eyes. Tom stifled a laugh, taking a swig of his drink to cover it. _God, I love and hate her in equal measures._

“Shush up, you saucy old minx!” Chided the General, chuckling. _I literally just want to die. I’ve never wanted to disappear so bad in my whole damn life._ I just stared around the table at these people I thought I knew so well, who I had thought were kind and caring people. _But no, you’re all just assholes. Geriatric assholes. Hell bent on making me look like a fool and die of embarrassment. I mean, I still love you all. I just want you to go to fuck yourselves._

They all smiled back at me, knowing exactly what I was thinking.

“Excuse me, I’m going to check on the pies.” I mumbled, and shot out of my chair toward the kitchen. I stood inside the kitchen door, breathing a sigh of, relief? _No. Brief pardon from imminent death of embarrassment. Something like that._ I went over to the oven, opening it and poking half heartedly at the pies. I knew they weren’t done yet, but I had needed an escape.

_Tom must think I’m a freak. That I must be so desperate. To have these old people trying to set us up. Oh, God! I hope he doesn’t think I put them up to it. Could this get any worse?_ I groaned, my face in my hands, as I leaned against the counter. This night was turning out horribly.

“Penny for your thoughts, love.”

_Ask and you shall receive. Fuck. Fuck, double, triple fuck._ I wailed in my head.

I turned around and looked at him. _God damnit. There he is. Looking far too fine in the General’s kitchen._

“I’m fine.” I said, throwing him a smile.

He smirked at me and came over to the counter. He put his hands at my waist and leaned down, kissing the side of my neck.

“I know she doesn’t know what she’s saying,” He murmured as he moved to the other side. “And I’m actually a little flattered that they seem so keen for us to be alone together. They all love you, and want what’s best for you.”

“I-I-I’m so sorry. You must think I’m such a weirdo.“ I sighed. He was doing that thing to my earlobe again, and it was making me go cross eyed. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but stop, please.” I was surprised, and to be honest, a little disappointed by how immediately he stepped back.

“I apologize. I’ve been too forward.” He said, a look almost like a mask of polite solicitude falling over his features.

“No! I just can’t think straight when you’re touching me, makes my brain go fuzzy and I wanted to say something to you with out sounding like a complete ass for once.” I explained. The boyish grin sprang back on to his face and he stepped forward again, putting his hands back on my waist.

“You can’t think straight when I touch you? Forgive me, but I find that very intriguing. I wonder, what would happen if I…” He trailed off, as he gripped my waist and hoisted me up onto the counter. He stepped between my legs, pulling them around his hips.

“Tom!” I gasped

“Yes, darling, get used to saying my name. You’ll be saying it a lot later.” He chuckled as my eyes glazed over while he ran his hands along my thighs, and around to my bottom, gripping it and pulling me closer to him.

“We can’t do this here!” I hissed at him.

“Hmm? What? No, of course not. I just find you so irresistible, love. I’m finding it harder and harder to keep my hands off you. I’m not normally like a randy school boy. I’m sorry.” He didn’t step back, but his hands stopped moving.

“What did you want to say to me?” He asked. I stared at him for a moment.

What did he want from me? He couldn’t possibly really be interested. _I’m just a distraction,_ I thought.

“Oh for fucks sake, Tom! Why are you doing this? You don't even know me! How you can possibly still want me is beyond me. Or how you even did in the first place. The events of last night aside, I then dragged you to spend your Christmas Eve with a bunch of crazy old people, who have threatened you with death if you get involved with me. Yes, I heard them, the old fools. And, then, because that wasn’t bad enough, they basically confirm what you must have already figured out on your own, that I’m a fucking mess.“ I was talking so quickly, just letting all my thoughts fall out of my mouth.

I stopped my tirade, searching his eyes, looking for an answer. I wanted to be wrong. I wanted him to really see something in me that was worth hanging around for. All I saw was guarded curiosity. I sighed.

“Why are you here? Why did you stay? Do you feel obligated? Is it the gentleman in you? Am I a damsel in distress? Or is it that you think I’m easy? That what John said last night was true? I assure you, from what he always said, I’m not that good in bed, if that’s what your after. And I don’t sleep around, anyways. There isn’t anything about me that should make you want to stay. I’m not like the women you work with. I’m not glamorous, I’m not beautiful. I’m not worldly. I’ve never left New England, for Christ’s sake!“ At this point, I was so worked up, that I felt the tears pooling in my eyes. I pushed him away from me and hopped off the counter, and practically ran to the back door.

Mitch was laying next to it and jumped to his feet. I opened the door and strode out into the back yard. Mitch came running after me as I moved toward the path that led to a small pond. _I cannot believe I just said that to him. What the fuck is wrong with me? I’m not usually this dramatic, running, crying from a room. He must really think I’m nuts now. I bet he’s gone when I come back. Oh, Rose. Why would you go and act like that?_ Mitch barked and ran past me down the path. There was snow on the ground, but it wasn’t as cold as it had been. I was still wishing I had my coat.

I walked further into the woods, coming to the small pond, where there was a bench under a large tree off to the side. I sat on the bench, and had a good, long, ugly cry. _This is it. I’m going to die old and alone. No man will ever want this mess. I just chased away the most handsome, lovely, sexy man who had ever deigned to touch me. Who cares if he just wanted sex, it probably would have been amazing anyways. You’re a fucking moron, Rosie Girl. You are officially the dumbest person I’ve ever met._ I scolded myself. I sat there, watching Mitch, finally starting to calm down. I wiped the tears from my face, taking big breaths of the crisp air.

“I think you want to be alone, but it’s cold out here, darling, so I just brought your coat.” Came a voice from behind me. I sat up straight on the bench, embarrassment coursing through my veins like fire.

“Tom, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that… I didn’t really mean that you… fuck. You can take my car if you want to go. I can get a ride.” I buried my head in my hands and sighed. I felt my jacket being draped over my shoulders. He didn’t say a word. I sat there for another ten minutes, not moving. _He left._ I thought. _Of course he left, you fucking lunatic! You would have left, too. You wish you could leave yourself here, you crazy bitch! Why would he stay after you showed him how insecure and needy you are? What guy in his right mind would want to deal with that train wreck?_

I let out a groan and opened my eyes. I gasped. He was still there. Standing patiently in front of me. He didn’t look irritated, or upset. He had a small smile on his lips.

“May I?” He asked, gesturing to the bench next to me. I nodded mutely.

“Thank you, love.” He said as he sat down. He took my hand in his and twined his long fingers with mine. We sat there. I don’t know how long. It felt like an eternity, but also seemed to last only seconds before he spoke again.

“I feel like I have to address a few things, for both our sanity.” He started off. “First of all, I want you to stop berating yourself. You have a right to have some trust issues. You are not, as you keep saying, a mess. You are strong. You have one of the biggest hearts I’ve had the pleasure to witness in action. You are beautiful, even with half your face purple.” He joked. “I am here because I wanted to be. There is something about you, like I told you already, that pulls me. I feel connected to you on a deeper level. I’m not, as you seem to think, just trying to get into your pants, though, I’ll admit, it is a side goal. Ehehehe. I want you, and I’m pretty sure you want me, as well. But it isn’t about making love. I want to see where we can go. Where this relationship, shhh, don’t interrupt,” He put a finger to my lips. “Strange as it may have started, this is a relationship, in one way or another. I want to see where this can go. As your loyal protectors said to me earlier, you’re not like the women I meet in my work. You’re real, and that’s one of the things I’m finding that I really like about you.”

“Oh, Tom, I’m sorry. I should never have said those things to you. I was just so embarrassed and-” He cut me off with a kiss. His kiss was so tender, so gentle. I sighed as he moved his lips on mine. His hands started to move on my body. I whimpered a little as he ran his tongue along my bottom lip. He pulled me into his lap, so that I was straddling him on the bench. His hands slid under my sweater, cold on my back. He kissed me, with an urgency that made me feel faint. His fingers traced my spine, making me shiver.

“Darling, is it too cold?” He asked, concern written on his face.

“Shhh.” Was all I could manage, as I leaned forward to capture his mouth again, grinding into his lap. He groaned and pulled me even closer to him, leaning back against the bench. His hand slid to my breasts, cupping and gently kneading them each in turn. My hands were gripping his shoulders, holding on for dear life. I ran my fingers up the back of his neck and into his hair, gently pulling him to me. I reached down to the waist of his pants, the heat between us making me bold. His eyes were smoldering and his breathing was already a little heavy. I wanted him more that I’ve wanted anything in my whole life. He began to fumble with the button and zipper on my jeans. I managed to get his zipper down, and reached into his boxers, stroking him. He groaned, his hips bucking forward.

He was kissing my neck, and he breathed into my ear, “You have no idea what you do to me, darling.”

“Oh, I’ve got a good idea,” I said breathlessly, with a small laugh as I stoked him again. He shifted me on his lap, pulled off my boots, and lifted me enough to pull my jeans down. He threw them onto the bench. He ran his hands along my bottom, gently squeezing. One hand came around in between us and began trailing its way up, settling at my most sensitive spot. I gasped as he started to slowly move his thumb in a circle. He smiled at me as I bit my lip to stifle a cry.

“Does that feel good, Love? What about this?” He asked as he slipped his finger into me. I buried my face in his shoulder, biting the fabric of his jacket. He worked me, his thumb pressing harder, making me moan his name. “Oh my God, you are so ready for me!” He groaned as he stoked the fire burning inside me. He curled his finger, making me arch back as I gripped his jacket even harder.

“Yes, yes. God, Tom I need you. Right now. I can’t. I can’t wait. Now.” I moaned, my breath coming in gasps. _If his fingers feels this good…_

He lifted my hips, and guided himself into me. The feeling of him stretching me, filling me was exquisite. I felt like I would explode from pleasure. I began to move on him, he was gripping my hips, pulling me closer with each thrust. I could feel something building. He was saying my name, and whispering soft, lovely words that I couldn’t really hear, but loved anyways.

I began to move faster, reaching for that feeling I knew was there. As I arched back, I felt myself close around him. I shattered into a million pieces as he bucked up and pulled my hips down to meet his, as he filled me completely. He moaned as he found his release as well.

I collapsed into his arms and he pulled me close, kissing my forehead, wrapping my jacket around us.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: language/ a wee bit'o'angst/ fluff/ saucy old ladies

 

I had my face buried into his chest, breathing in his scent. I could hear his heart, loud and fast. I could feel mine pounding as well, as I tried to catch my breath. He was running his hands lightly up and down my legs, which were starting to get cold. As if he sensed it, he pulled my coat a little lower, covering them.

“Rose, that was…” He breathed, stopping to pull my chin gently upwards so we were face to face. I cringed inwardly, waiting for his to say it was shit. “That was…God, that was…. I can’t even think straight right now. It was amazing. Almost…..spiritual.“ He looked at me for a moment, his searing blue eyes searching my face. “Darling, are you alright?”

I didn’t answer him. I could feel a knot building in my throat. I was willing it to go away and not ruin this. I had never felt this before. Never had I felt this connected to someone, and so quickly. I was on a deeper level than I had ever been with another person. Tom saying that it had been amazing and fucking spiritual didn’t help. And it had been amazing. I had only ever been with John. He certainly had never said anything like that. As for the sex, at best, it had been tolerable.

_Don’t, Rose. Please, please, please! Don’t you fucking DARE!_ I screamed in my head. I could feel tears stinging in the corner of my eyes and my throat burned. My breath hitched in my chest. _Oh. My. Fucking. God. You’re fucking crying? Really? God damn it, Rose. I’m disowning you. Yes, I’m disowning myself, because you are pathetic and I just can’t with you._

“Rose….” He looked stricken. “Sweetheart, did I hurt you? Rose, can you please answer me?” He gave my shoulders a little shake. “Rose!”

“No-no-no! T-Tom, I’m s-s-sorry!” I stuttered, the tears falling now. Now I couldn’t tell if it was from the feelings that I had or from embarrassment. I tried to bury myself back into the warmth and somewhat safety of his sweater, but he held me back to face him again.

“What’s wrong? Please…” He begged me. His brow was pulled together in concern and he gripped my arms. I sniffled and dashed at the offending tears angrily. I took a shaky breath.

“I’m sorry. Oh my go-god, I’m so sorry. You didn’t hur-hurt me. I’m fine.” I said quickly, pushing myself back into his chest so I didn’t have to look at him while I told him what was going on in my head. He seemed to understand, because he just wrapped his arms around my back, and pulled me tight to him. “Tom…. I didn’t mean to react that way. I’ve just never….” I burrowed my face in his sweater and mumbled.

“What? Had sex outside?” He asked, running his hands up and down my back, pulling me closer.

“Well, no, but…” I muttered.

“But that’s not it, is it? Had sex on the first date? I know this doesn’t really count as a date, but it’s our first outing together. I’m usually not one for it either, but it’s alright, Love. This is different. You don’t have to be ashamed of it, it was beautiful…” He trailed off because I was shaking my head against his chest.

“What, then, Rose?” He said, trying to pull me back so he could see my face. I burrowed closer to him and took a deep breath. _God, he smells so damn good._

“It’s stupid. I don’t even know what to say.“ I stopped, weighing my words. _Oh for fucks sake! Just tell the man. You can’t look like more of an idiot at this point._ I took another deep breath. "I just never felt like this. I’d only ever been with John, and to be completely honest, most of the time it wasn’t good. I never really enjoyed it, that’s for sure. I’ve never had an orgasm. I didn’t think I could. He always made me feel like it was my fault it wasn’t good. That there was something wrong with me. I guess I just didn’t know it could be like this.“ I said quietly into his chest. "I’m sorry. I don’t know why I reacted the way I did. When you said that it was amazing, I just….”

“Rose. Look at me.” He commanded. I pulled away from the safety of his chest and looked at his face. His eyes were kind and he had a gentle smile on his lips. “You’re making me wish I had done more than dislocate that worm’s jaw!” I snorted, not expecting the joke, but he got the smile he wanted. “Woman, you scared me! I thought I had hurt you. You have no idea how relieved I am that you feel the same as I do. Please, don’t be upset, this is a good thing.” He ran his thumb along my jaw line. “This is a very good thing.”

“I’m not normally this… emotional. You seem to bring out the best in me.” I said sarcastically, looking away. He chuckled. “ I’m just not used to…. nice.”

“Get used to it. This is how you should feel. How you deserve to be treated. Well, except the whole ravishing you on a bench in the woods part. Well actually, that’s ok, occasionally.” He laughed. “As for the orgasm, we’ll have to work on another one, or several, of those for you, later. You have a lot of catching up to do, from the sound of it, madam.“ He murmured, positively smoldering. “As much as I’d like to stay out here, with just you, we are being rude to our host, I think. We should head back. And I need to find some wood.” He said. “Though I think Norma will know, she kept telling me to go after you. She offered me a blanket as I was heading out the door.” He laughed.

I reached over and grabbed my jeans, vaguely wondering where my panties had gone. I pulled on the jeans, then my boots, standing and trying to adjust my clothes a little. Tom stood with me, and wrapped his hands around my waist, pulling me flush to him. He smiled and kissed my forehead. Taking my hand in his, we turned back towards the path.

“Where’s Mitch? Mitch!” I called.

He came bounding out of the woods, carrying a rock. He trotted over to us, wagging his tail.

"This guy and his rocks!” Tom chuckled, scratching Mitch’s head.

We headed back towards the house, looking for wood on the way. When we had found enough for a decent fire, we walked back up the path. Walking across the back yard, we could see several faces in the kitchen window, looking out at us. They all scattered when they realized we had spotted them. I groaned.

“They’ve been watching for us. Nosy old women.”

“I think I see Stewart and Doug in the mix there.” Tom laughed.

“Ugh, the guys are worse than the women sometimes.“ I bit out.

Tom shifted the wood in his arms. Doug rushed out to help us. He grabbed the armload of sticks I had.

“Must’ve been hard to find wood with all the snow.” He said, grinning at me, slapping Tom on the back.

"Oh, yes. Of course. All the snow. Yes.” Tom said evasively. I just rolled my eyes at his horrible cover-up and walked ahead of them into the kitchen. It was so nice and warm and smelled like the pies, which were now on the counter, along with my cookies.

“That was quick!” Peggy said loudly, her smile a little too big. She handed me a cup of tea. I accepted it with a small smile. I looked over at Martha, she just raised an eyebrow.

“It was long enough, though, wasn’t it? You’re glowing, dear!” Irene whispered, winking at me as she turned to cut the pies.

“Well, now that you’ve had your dessert dear, I think I’ll have mine.” Norma whispered at my elbow. She made her way over to the counter and grabbed a cookie. _They’re lucky I love them._ I thought to myself.  
I went to help Irene. She asked me to put on a pot of coffee and put some more water in the kettle for tea. Martha sat at the kitchen table watching me, not saying a word, a small smile playing at her lips.

“Hey, Hiddleston. Come help an old lady carry her coffee into the parlor.” Norma ordered, winking at me, adding under her breath "You know, if you’re not too worn out, of course.“ Tom snapped to attention from his spot lounging against the counter, a cookie hanging out of his mouth. He rushed over to her and took the two coffee cups she was holding and followed her down the hallway. I shared a smile with Irene. Martha coughed. I turned to her.

"Come on. Everyone else had their comments. Let’s hear yours.” I said, my hands on my hips. She stood from the table and walked over to the island where Irene and Peggy were doling out pies onto plates and setting up the coffee and tea tray to bring in the other room. Coming around to my side, she pulled me into a hug.

“Honey Bunny, it is such a relief to see you with _that smile_ on your face.” She said into my hair.

“That smile?” I replied, not sure where this was going. She pulled back and held me at arms length, looking over at Irene and Peggy.

“You know that smile, right ladies?” She asked them. They both smiled and nodded. “Mhmm, I bet you do, dirty birdies that you are. That is the smile of a woman that has just had herself a good time. With a good man. A _good_ man. I was worried that piece of shit John had broken you. Turns out I was wrong. Very wrong indeed. I know it’s early, Sweetness, but I see this working.” She smiled at me, then added, “And if it doesn’t, at least you got some that was worth getting!”

Cackling, she grabbed the coffee tray and sauntered off down the hallway. Peggy and Irene laughed and followed her, carrying the pies on trays. I stood in the kitchen, not knowing if I wanted to laugh or not. I shrugged and grabbed the plate of cookies and followed them.

Once everyone was settled with their dessert and beverages, and the fire was crackling merrily, we started on the presents. I had gotten the guys all scarfs, and the women pretty Christmas pins for their coats. Norma and Sarah got the quilt covered baskets, which could hang off the front of their walkers.

“That’s a pretty smart idea, love.” Tom said to me. I was sitting on the floor, leaning against his legs. He was running his long fingers discreetly up and down the back of my neck, it felt marvelous.

“Thanks, it’s something I’ve been working on for a while. Here, this is for you. It’s nothing special. Just made me think of how we met…..” I said sheepishly, handing him a bag. He looked at me with that boyish grin, that was becoming so dear to me. He ripped out the tissue paper and pulled out a nutcracker. It was an old one, a little beat up, and missing an ear.

“It was my grandmother’s, she always had it out at Christmas, with a bowl of nuts next to it…. if you don’t-” he cut me off by reaching down and caressing my cheek.

“Darling, I love it. My mum has one like this and she always has it out with a bowl of nuts, and my sisters an I would fight over who got the pecans… that’s why I was at the store looking for them… a reminder of Christmas at home. Thank you.” He leaned over and kissed my cheek. I looked around, and was met with smiles and nods. I looked back at Tom and he was playing with the lever on the back, making it talk to Sarah, who was laughing. I sighed, content. The General and Martha were over at Bess’s old piano, trying to find some Christmas music. Phil and Stewart were telling old stories, making the girls laugh. David was sleeping in his chair.

It was a good night.

“I think it’s time to get this show on the road, Rosie.” Norma said from her perch on the window seat. “It’s starting to snow.”

“Ok, I’ll just run out and start the car, let it warm up. You guys give me your keys and I’ll start yours too and brush them off.” I said, collecting the keys. Tom jumped up and came to help me. After starting all the cars, we each took a snow brush and divided and conquered. I was on my last one at the end of the row of cars, when I hear a rustling in the woods behind me. I stopped and looked into the woods. I couldn’t see anything, but I had the unnerving feeling that I was being watched.

Tom joined me, and we finished the car together. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we walked back to the house. I turned to look once more at the spot in the woods, and stopped in my tracks, turning fully. I could have sworn I saw someone standing there, but when I turned, there was no one there.

“What is it, Rose?” Tom asked, his body going tense as he looked where I was looking, picking up on my slight panic. “Did you see something?”

“I…no. It was just an animal or something. The wind.” I said, grabbing his hand and turning back to the house. _Do not let that bastard get into your head, Rosie. Why would he be in the woods? Besides, even if he knew where you were, he’s in jail!_

After we helped everyone pack up, and said our goodbyes, we headed out into the snowy night. Tom helped Norma and Sarah into my car as I got Mitch into the back.

“Teddy, are you going to stay at our house? We have the spare room.” Sarah said from the back.

“Oh, for fucks sake, Sarah! He’s not-” Norma started, but at the look on Sarah’s face, she couldn’t bring herself to finish.

“It’s ok Norma,” Tom said quietly. “Thank you, Sarah, but I think it best if I go with Rose. She needs my help.”

“I’ll bet she does.” Cackled Norma. Tom chuckled quietly.

_Fuck my life._ I thought, but honestly, I wouldn’t change her for the world.

We pulled up to their house, Tom jumped out and started helping Sarah to the door.

“Rosie, let me give you a piece of advice.” Norma said, leaning in to speak quietly to me.

“Norma, I don’t need advice on sex, thanks though. Or that he will only break my heart, I don’t really need that conversation either.” I said, really not wanting to hear it. She looked affronted.

“I was going to say,” she said, putting her nose in the air, “don’t let him get away. The boys a keeper, and not just because he’s gorgeous, rich, famous, talented, sweet, funny… I could go on. He’s got a heart, and a big one, too. I bet that’s not all that’s big!” She giggled. “Sorry, couldn’t help myself.” She kissed me on the cheek, turned and headed up the walk, leaving me speechless.

_Could this work? I know it’s amazing right now, but how can this possibly go on? We live in completely different worlds. I’m here, and he’s… everywhere else but here. Will he forget about me as soon as he leaves?_ I thought to myself, doubt creeping in again. Then I looked up and saw Tom striding towards me, snow clinging to his hair.

“Ready to go home, love?” He opened my door and pecked me on the cheek as he helped me in the car.

I have never been more ready for anything in my life.

 


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Oh. I forgot about this angst. There’s angst. and language. And Orange Cinnamon Rolls. OMG Yes.

  
Just after leaving the twins, my phone started going off, Here Comes the Sun ringing out loudly over the soft Christmas music coming from the radio.

“Would you like me to get it for you, love?’ Tom asked.

“Yeah, its in my jacket pocket.” I answered. I wondered who it could be as he reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone.

“It’s Doug.” He said as he looked at the screen. “Hey Doug. Yes, she’s driving. Really? But, why? But is that enough? Ok, I’ll tell her. Alright, yes, Merry Christmas to you, too.”

“What could he possibly want? We literally just left him!” I said, looking over at Tom, who looked grim.

“Rose, John’s made bail. I guess his parents paid to get him out. Doug just wanted to let you know. He said that there is a restraining order against him, he isn’t supposed to come near you. Darling, are you ok?” He was looking at me with concern in his eyes.

“He’s out?” I breathed. “How could they let him out? He was going to…He-He wanted to…” I trailed off. My hands were gripped to the steering wheel, my knuckles white.

“Pull the car over, darling.” He said gently.

“I’m fine.” I snapped. My mind was racing. _How could they have let him out? Didn’t Doug say they were going to charge him with attempted murder? It’ll be fine. He doesn’t know where my apartment was. He was drunk. He would have realized what a huge mistake he had made by now, surely?_ I thought. _Oh my god. That was him in the woods. He had been watching me clean off the cars. He was right there. Oh my God. Tom had been right there. He could have attacked Tom. If something happened to him because of me…..Fuck! No. No, no, no. You are over reacting, and need to calm the fuck down. It was an animal. There is no way he would have known where you were. It wasn’t him._

“Darling…” Tom said, gently grabbing the steering wheel and guiding us to the side of the road. “Brakes, Rose.” I slammed on the brakes and threw the car in park. I turned to look at him. He unbuckled my seatbelt and pulled me into his arms. I let him hug me for a moment then pulled back.

“Tom, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’m so sorry that you have to deal with all this craziness. I just didn’t know how to handle that news. I thought that they would keep him longer. I’m ok, really. It doesn’t matter that he’s out. He’ll have come to his senses. Besides, he has no idea where I live now. He definitely wouldn’t come to my work, Dr. M and Alex would kill him if he ever showed up there, and that was before any of this even happened. My apartment is safe and I’ll have Mitch after you are g-….” I stopped, swallowing hard. I turned to look at him. He seemed tense, watching me closely, waiting to see how I would finish. I closed my eyes and just said it.

“Gone. After you are gone. When you leave. I’ll be ok. You don’t have to worry about me. You don’t want to deal with this shit, do you? You don’t need anymore complications in your life, I’m sure. Don’t feel like you need to stay to protect me. Or that you have to stay because you’ll hurt my feelings. I’m not worth the trouble. ” I said, staring out the windshield. _Maybe it would be better if he left? That way if John did come back, Tom couldn’t get hurt trying to protect your crazy ass. You are the reason all this is happening._ I though. I could feel him staring at me. I looked over at him and his face was stone. He was looking at me hard. I swallowed again and looked back out the windshield.

“What did he do to you?” He asked quietly. “What did that bastard do that made you feel like you don’t matter? Why do you keep fighting this? This must be the fifth time we’ve had this conversation. I swear, had I known at the time, I would have gotten in a few more hits. Rose…” I didn’t answer him. I didn’t know what to say. _How could I tell him how I felt?_ I sighed and put the car in drive, pulling back onto the snowy road.

“Rose… Talk to me. Tell me what you’re thinking?” He asked.

“It’s probably best if I don’t right now.” I said. He was quiet as I pulled up the driveway. I parked the car behind his Jag.

“Where did that come from?” I asked, finally looking at him. He was still looking at me with that same tense, searching look on his face.

“I had it brought here. The rental people were very obliging.” He said, his eyes boring into mine.

“Oh, I see. I’ll go grab your bag for you then?” I couldn’t quite hide the tears in my voice. Even though I had just thought that it would be best if he left, I still didn’t want him to go.

“Only if you want me to go, darling. Rose, is that what you want?” He asked quietly. I stared at him. God, I didn’t want this glorious man to walk out of my life, like nothing had happened. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and never let go. But was he staying because he felt the need to protect me? Would he have left if Doug hadn’t called, if John was still in jail? I couldn’t stop the tears from welling in my eyes.

“Rose…. What do you want?” He asked gently. I looked out the front window, at the back of the beautiful car in front of us. I took a shaky breath and looked back at him, forcing myself to meet his eyes.

“I want you to stay, but not because I’m some mess you feel the need to fix, or a damsel in distress that needs protecting. I’ll be fine. I want you more than anything, more than the air I breathe. I don’t know why I keep pushing you away, I feel like I don’t know anything anymore. My whole life has been flipped upside down in the last 24 hours. I think maybe I just cant believe that you’re real. I already told you, not to make promises that you can’t keep. You said last night that you will never hurt me, but what if you do, even if you have good intentions? I’ve been through a lot of shit in the past year, as my geriatric meddlers told you earlier, and I don’t know if my soul can handle anything else. I know that sounds dramatic, but I’m serious. It’s pretty beat up at this point, and I don’t think it can take many more cracks. If you want to be with me, I want to be with you, desperately, but don’t stay because you feel obligated. John won’t come back for me. He’s not that stupid. Well, he’s pretty stupid, but even for him that would be pretty bad.” He chuckled at that, and reached out, touching my cheek.

“Darling, I don’t want to change a thing about you. I want you. I want your mind, I want your body, I want your soul, damaged or not. No one’s soul is in perfect condition, anyways. I want YOU. All of you. What’s going on right now doesn’t define you. While I do want to protect you, its not because you are a damsel in distress, as you put it. It’s because you are precious to me. Yes, even after only such a short time of knowing you. I want to be with you. You, just as you are.” He said. He leaned over and kissed me gently.

“Shall we go up? The snow is really starting to come down.” He asked, matters settled as far as he was concerned. I nodded, getting out of the car. I still had my doubts. If I’m at all honest, they were screaming in my head. I told them to shut the fuck up. They muttered a little, and then stopped. I knew I couldn’t stop myself from thinking that he was better off getting away from here, away from me, but I was too selfish to tell him to go.

As we got into the kitchen, Mitch shook his coat off, and pattered down the hall with his new rock. I threw my keys on the counter and went over to the living room. I turned on the Christmas tree and my little electric fireplace. Tom stood in the doorway, watching me. I flipped on the radio, Christmas tunes softly filled the room. I smiled at him as I passed him on my way into the kitchen. I went over to the pantry and pulled out a cookbook and set it on the counter.

“What are you making?” He asked curiously, pulling a chair out from the kitchen table and sitting down.

“Christmas tradition in my family.” I said wistfully. “Orange cinnamon rolls. Make the dough the night before, bake them on Christmas morning and eat them while opening presents.”

“Where is your family? You mentioned a brother. Are your parents still around?” He asked as he stood up and came over to the counter.

“Oh, yes. My brother and his wife and kids live down south. My parents are usually about an hour and a half from here, but they went to see them for the holidays. They had asked me to go, but I couldn’t leave work for 2 weeks. We are a little short staffed right now.”

“I’m glad you didn’t go.” He said quietly. I nodded my agreement as I flipped through my cookbook.

“Do you want some wine?” I asked absentmindedly as I read the recipe to myself. I gestured to the wine rack in the corner. He went over to my wine rack, and began looking through the bottles, selecting a nice red. He opened the bottle and poured us each a glass.

“Can you put some ice in mine? I’m tacky and drink my red wine with ice.” I laughed.

“Oh, the shame!” He said. He went over to the fridge and got some ice, dropping the cubes into my glass. He came to stand behind me, placing my glass next to the cookbook. His free hand found its way to my waist. I sighed in contentment.

“So, Orange Cinnamon Rolls? I’ve never had them, and I like to think I’m a bit of a dessert connoisseur.” He chuckled.

“I think my grandmother invented them, to be honest. I’ve never seen them anywhere else, anyways, though maybe its a French thing.” I turned to go to the pantry and he didn’t move so I bounced off his chest and back into the counter.

“I’m sorry, darling. Am I in your way?” He drawled.

“I-uh. I need to get the, uhm. The. Stuff.” I said lamely. I couldn’t think when he was this close, and his eyes were all blue and sexy.

“The stuff?” He asked innocently.

“Yeah, stuff.” I said. _Get your shit together WOMAN!_ I mentally yelled at myself. I shook my head to clear the haze that had settled in my brain.

“Ahem, excuse me.” I said tartly, pushing past him, and going into the pantry. I heard him chuckle. _Bastard._ I gathered the ingredients and took a deep breath, heading back into the kitchen.

_Focus, you sad, sad woman. He’s just a man. There are Orange Cinnamon Rolls at stake here. Don’t mess this up. Meme would be very disappointed in you if you screw up her rolls. Who am I kidding? She wouldn’t give a damn about the rolls if she could see the man that is currently lounging against my kitchen counter. She’s want to know why I was baking, and not climbing him like a tree._ I started to giggle at the thought.

“What’s so funny, love?” He asked smiling.

“You don’t want to know.” I muttered, reaching into a cabinet for a mixing bowl.

“Oh, but I think I do.” He said.

“Can you grab me those oranges over there?” I asked him, trying to change the subject. 

“Sure, so what was so funny?” He asked again.

“I was just thinking that my Meme would have liked you.” I said, laughing.

“And that’s funny because…”

“Oh, no reason. Do you know how to zest an orange?” I asked, handing him a grater.

“I do, in fact. How much do you need?” He asked, setting down his glass.

I took a gulp of my own wine, and pointed to the oranges. “All of them. Thanks.”

I walked past him and he grabbed me by the waist, stopping me. He brushed his hand down my cheek, and kissed me. His hands ran down my back and settled at my hips. He deepened the kiss, pressing me harder against his hips. I sighed against his lips. He let me go and turned back to his oranges and began grating the zest. I stood there for a moment.

“You ok?” He asked over his shoulder. I glared at him for a second, then went back to measuring the rest of the ingredients. Once the dough was formed, I rolled it out and spread the filling on it, rolled it, placed it on the pan and covered it with a towel. I walked over and stuck it in the fridge. I looked over at Tom as I shut the fridge door. He was leaning against the counter, and he looked exhausted.

“Did you sleep at all last night?” I asked him. He smiled sheepishly at me.

“No, I was worried that you might need me and I can be a pretty heavy sleeper. Plus, I was reading, and I can stay up all night if I have something I want to read.”

“I do that, too. Listen. Why don’t you go lay down? I’ll finish cleaning up, then I’m going to take a quick shower.”

He looked at me and smiled. “Sure. Wake me when you come to bed?” I nodded, knowing that I would do no such thing.

He headed off toward my bedroom, and I finished picking up the mess I had made. I shut off the fireplace and the radio, took my wine and headed through the bedroom into the bathroom. Tom was laying on his side. I couldn’t tell if he was asleep, but he didn’t stir as I made my way into the bathroom. I took my wine into the shower with me and enjoyed a nice, long, hot shower. When I was done, I pulled on my giant tee shirt and went into the bedroom. Tom had rolled onto his back and was snoring gently. Mitch was laying on his feet. I felt like crying, looking at this man. Who was so sweet. Who was so beautiful. Who was in my bed. Who desired me. Who wanted to be with me. Who my dog obviously loved already. I crawled into the bed with him and lay there for a long time, just watching him. At one point, he murmured something and reached out to me, rolling towards me and wrapping his arm around me, pulling me closer.

“You were supposed to wake me, naughty girl.” He said into my ear, his voice scratchy with sleep.

“I know, but you looked so peaceful, and you haven’t slept. Sleep.” I said, and kissed his jawline.

“Minx.” He yawned. I snuggled closer, and he held me tight. I sighed contentedly. He opened one eye and looked at me for a moment.

“Merry Christmas, Rose.”

“Merry Christmas, Tom.”

I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

 


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: nightmares/ smutty smut/ language

 

_I was in the woods again. There was more snow on the ground than last time, but it was sweltering hot. There was a thick blanket of fog settled all around me and I couldn’t see more than a few feet in front of me. I turned to run, but my legs wouldn’t move. I could hear something crashing through the woods behind me. I could feel a scream building in my chest as it got closer and closer. I willed my legs to move, but it was like they were stuck in the snow. I looked behind me, and I could see a shape just out of my line of sight, circling me in the mist._

I woke with a start. I lay there for a moment, breathing hard. I bit my lip to stop it from trembling as I squeezed my eyes shut. _You’re safe. You’re safe. You’re in you’re bed and you’re safe. Jesus, its fucking hot in here_. I thought groggily.

Then I looked down and noticed the long, pale arm thrown over my chest, and below that an even longer leg across my thighs. Mitch peeked over the leg from down on my feet. _No wonder I’m dying of hotness, every male in this house has decided to lay on me. And that would be why you couldn’t run. What the fuck was that thing anyways?_

I turned my head, and looked at the man sharing my bed with me. He really was beautiful when he was asleep. His long eyelashes resting on his cheeks. His mouth, which smiled and smirked so quickly, was hanging open just a tiny bit. He was breathing deep and even. I was glad I hadn’t woken him. It made me feel more calm just watching him. I watched him for a bit more, then decided at I really had to pee. I slowly slid out from under his leg and arm and off the side of the bed. He didn’t stir. He hadn’t been kidding about being a heavy sleeper. I laughed quietly to myself.

I went to the bathroom, did my thing and brushed my teeth. Then I quietly made my way to the kitchen and put the orange cinnamon rolls in the oven. I pulled out a mixing bowl and started to make the frosting that went on top, humming along with the Christmas songs on the radio as I moved about the kitchen. After the rolls were done, I put them on a pretty plate and drizzled the frosting over them and placed them back in the warm oven.

I poked my head into the bedroom, and Tom was still asleep, Mitch laying lengthwise on his body, his head on Tom’s chest. I giggled quietly. He groaned.

“Mitch, Buddy. You’re killing me.” He said, his voice strained. I giggled again. He lifted his head and peered over my massive dog at me. He smiled.

“Merry Christmas, Darling. Those rolls smell amazing.” He said, trying to push Mitch off, gently. Mitch gave him a kiss, causing him to laugh.

“Merry Christmas, to you, too.” I said, making my way over to the bed. I snapped my fingers and Mitch jumped off the bed. I climbed up onto the bed and sat down facing him.

“Did you sleep alright? Any more nightmares?” He asked, watching me closely.

“I slept great. No, no nightmares.” I lied. I don’t know why, but I didn’t want to tell him about the nightmare that had woken me.

“Mhmm.” He murmured, still searching my face. To change the subject, I leaned over to him and kissed his forehead softly, to the right of the little cut.

“That looks good. You can probably take off the steri-strip now.” I said, as I started to pull the edges of it up. He watched me as I worked the bandage off, making sure it didn’t stick to the wound. “Yeah, looks fine. Probably won’t even have much of a scar.” I rambled. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his mouth, tenderly kissing the scrapes and cuts on my palms. He reached up and gingerly ran his fingers down the side of my face that was bruised.

“Its starting to turn different colors…It looks worse, its spreading downward. Have you looked at it?” He asked, concerned.

“Yeah, its fine. Bruises on the face tend to travel with gravity. Its going to look gross for a bit, but its fine.” I said, looking away, ashamed. He gently pulled my chin back, so I was facing him again.

“Rose, you are beautiful, do you know that? Even right now. Especially right now. This will fade, but the beauty that you hold won’t. It’s inside you. In your heart, in your eyes. You have such life in your eyes, such animation in your face. I could look at you all day.” I felt like I was going to cry. Why did this man always make me want to cry, but in a good way? This was new to me. I leaned over and kissed his lips. Once, twice, three times. I worked my way down his jaw, to his neck. He had a beautiful, elegant neck. I kissed where his pulse throbbed, and it jumped at my touch. I chuckled lightly, feeling empowered by the response. I kissed my way down it to his chest. I took full advantage of his mostly smooth chest, kissing and licking my way down, stopping to pay homage to each of his nipples, causing him to giggle and squirm.

“Ticklish?” I murmured. “I’ll have to remember that.” I moved down to his stomach. kissing slowly. He sucked in a breath when I reached the edge of the sheet. I ran my fingers along the trail of hair that pointed to my ultimate goal. “Hmm. And I didn’t think that I would have anything to unwrap on Christmas morning.” I said cheekily, dipping my fingers under the sheet, slowly pulling it down.

“God, Rose…” He breathed.

“Shhh… Let me open my present.” I said softly.

As the sheet skimmed past his thighs, his erection sprang free. I know I had touched it and it had been inside me last night, but I truly didn’t realize. The man was gifted. I continued smattering kisses along his lower abdomen, following the trail. I kissed his thighs, getting closer and closer. I could see him twitching out of the corner of my eye, and it made me smile. I really enjoyed having a little bit of power over this man, since the majority of the time he made my brain feel so fuzzy and like I couldn’t remember my name. Finally, I reached out and took him in my hand, slowly grasping him and stroking. He took a deep breath. I looked up from my study of him to find him watching me, with an almost predatory gleam in his eye.

“Do you realize how badly you are killing me right now?” He practically groaned. I gave him a small smile and leaned over and took him in my mouth. I took him as far as I could, and then ran my tongue back up along the bottom of his cock, finishing at the tip, swirling my tongue around it. I repeated this several times, moving to lick around the tip.

“Fuck, I- No. I can’t anymore.” He said. Next thing I knew, I was on my back and he was leaning over me. His eyes bore into mine for a split second, then he was kissing me, hard. His hands were everywhere, caressing, squeezing. I moaned as his fingers found their way down to my thigh and he squeezed. He moved his fingers up and his thumb began circling my clit, while he pushed into me with another finger. I grabbed his shoulders and closed my eyes against the onslaught of pleasure. His kissed were raining down on my neck and chest. He took a taught nipple in his mouth, gently nipping at it.

“Oh my fucking God.” I breathed.

“Oh, yes, Darling. Just you wait.” He said into my chest. He pulled up and was hovering over me, his arms on either side of my head. I wrapped my arms around his lower back and pulled him toward me.  
He looked at me, raising his eyebrow.

“God, damn it, Tom. Now!” I demanded.

“Impatient girl.” He chuckled. He thrust forward, embedding himself to the hilt. I let out a gush of air, not expecting to be filled so quickly. He held himself very still, watching my face. Once the initial shock wore off, I began to move my hips against his, causing a big grin to spread across his face. He began to move, slowly increasing his speed. I could feel myself spiraling closer and closer to the edge. He reached between us, his thumb circling the already swollen bud. I cried out as I exploded, my insides clenching around him, holding on tight. He rolled to the side, taking me with him, so that he was on his back now and I was straddling him. My legs were still numb from my earth shattering orgasm, when I felt him begin thrusting his hips up to mine. I began to move again, feeling that sensation building again.

“Oh my God, I can’t again. I can’t. Oh God.” I cried as he grabbed my hips. He was pushing and pulling me at a relentless pace.

“Oh, yes you can, and you will.” He ground out from between clenched teeth, pushing harder. I was riding him hard as his hands dug into my hips and suddenly I felt it coming. I felt like I had shattered into pieces and he was the only thing keeping me from floating away. He thrust once more and he came, filling me.

I fell down onto his chest, both of us breathing as if we had run a marathon.

He was running his hands along my back, and I made to move off of him. He held me close, and said, “No, stay.”

I sighed and closed my eyes, listening to his racing heart. My breathing began to slow down, and I felt so sated, and tired. I drifted off to sleep in his arms as he smoothed my hair away from my face and kissed my forehead.

~*~*~*~

We awoke in the early afternoon, and ate reheated orange cinnamon rolls. We sat in the living room and talked about our lives, families, careers. He told me that he had been in the area because he was filming a movie in the western part of the state, up in the mountains. He had been headed to Boston when we met.

“Were you going home for Christmas?” I asked, feeling guilty.

“No, I was just going to stay in the city. I’ve been staying at a hotel there most nights. There is a house that the production company rented up in the mountains, but I was feeling a little sorry for myself that I couldn’t make it home to see my family, and wanted to be alone. Shows how wrong I can be.” He smiled at me.

“So you have to go back when?” I asked.

“Monday morning. So we still have two whole days to ourselves, love.” He reached over to where I was sitting on the couch and pulled me in his lap, kissing me.

“I could get used to this.” I sighed.

“I hope you do,” He murmured into my hair.

The next two days flew by. We cooked meals, listened to music, read to each other from our favorite books. It was pure, fluffy, fairytale magic. We made love too many times and places to count. Monday morning came far too soon.

My alarm woke me at 4:45am. I groggily reached over and shut it off. Tom snuggled closer to me, pulling me into his side.

“Tom. Babe, I have to get up.” I said and I pulled away.

“Hmm. First time you’ve called me that. I like it.” He mumbled, as he rolled over and fell back asleep. I showered and got ready, going into the closet to pick out a pair or scrubs. I pulled out my favorite, green with purple and pink frogs on it.

When I went back into the bedroom, Tom was sitting up, with the most magnificent bed head I have ever seen. I really wanted to jump back into bed with him. He seemed to be thinking along the same lines, as he pat the mattress next to him.

“No. I can’t! I’ll be late!” I laughed as I turned and left the temptation behind me. I went into the kitchen and made my lunch. I made one for Tom, too. He didn’t have to eat it if he didn’t want to. It made me feel better. Like I was sending a little piece of me with him.

We hadn’t really discussed when we would see each other again. We hadn’t wanted to think about it. It had been looming in the background the whole weekend, but neither of us had brought it up. Tom came into the kitchen, hair tamed, dressed in dark grey jeans and a navy blue sweater. I sighed.

“What’s wrong, love?” He asked and he came over and kissed me on the nose.

“I’ll be the one to mention the pink elephant in the room, shall I?” I asked him.

“Oh, that. Yes. I’ve decided, if its ok, I will try to come back here at night? Some nights I won't be able to, if we are doing a night scene. But I should be able to tonight.” He said, wrapping his arms around me. I breathed in his scent, not wanting him to let me go.

“That sound fantastic.” I said into his chest.

“I’d hoped you’d say that!“ He chuckled.

We finished getting ready, and I handed him his lunch in a brown paper bag. He looked at it for a moment, then a huge grin spread across his face.

“Darling, I lo-” he stopped short and stared at me. I swallowed hard. _No. He was not going to say what I fucking think he was going to say. Was he?_ I thought frantically. _No. Uh uh. Way too soon. Even though I totally feel the same. But I’m crazy. He’s not. Unless he is. We can both be crazy together. Say it. Fucking say it you bastard! You started it! Ok. Calm down Rose. Back off the ledge, girl._

“Thank you, you are so sweet.” He said, averting his eyes from mine. _He wasn’t going to say it, you sad, sad woman._

I sighed as I grabbed my bags and pulled on my coat. He grabbed his coat and his lunch.

It was really cold out, I was kicking myself for not starting my car to let it warm up. I stared at my car, thinking something looked off. I walked over to it, to inspect it more closely.

“Shit!” I cursed. “Both my drivers side tires are flat!” I turned to look at Tom. Tom came over, his brow knit together and looked at my tires. His head whipped up, and he began scanning the lawn leading to the main house, and the woods bordering the yard in the back.

“What?” I asked, starting to get spooked.

“Nothing.” He said slowly. “Come on, love, I’ll give you a lift.”

I took one last look around and followed him to his car.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/nightmares/sandwich theft and a few dirty thoughts (I’m leaving this from the original post: This chapter is dedicated to my real work husband, who has no idea that I write, about this story, that I shamelessly based a character on him, or that I ratted him out for always stealing my lunch. I do have him to thank for dragging me to see War Horse all those years ago and, if inadvertently, introducing me to Tom.)

 

Tom parked the car and jumped out, coming around to my door. He pushed his glasses up on his nose as he ran around the front of the car. _Jesus, he looks so fucking hot in glasses… I wonder if I asked, if he would leave them on during…._ I thought to myself. _NO. Focus, Rose. You need to get through this goodbye without crying or wrapping yourself around his leg and begging him not to leave you here._

“You didn’t have to open the door for me.” I laughed at him when he reached in for my hand. His face did not hide his displeasure at my comment. He pulled me into his arms, burying his face in my hair.

“Yes, Rose, I did. You deserve to be treated like this. Can’t you get that through your lovely, thick skull?” He murmured. I giggled into his chest, then pulled back and looked at him.

“I’m going to miss you today. How late do you think you’ll be?” I tried not to sound pathetic and clingy. I don’t think it worked.

“I’m not sure, but I’ll text you when I’m on my way, darling.” He said as he leaned down and captured my mouth in a long, heady kiss. He was holding me tight, kissing me passionately, when we heard someone clearing their throat. _Oh, for fucks sake_ ….. I thought, rolling my closed eyes.

“Ahem. Do you mind telling me who the hell you are, and why you’re grabbing at my wife like a dog with a steak?” Drawled a deep male voice. I knew that voice and pulled back to see Tom staring down at me with confusion written all over his face.

“Work wife, Alex.” I corrected, biting my lip to keep from laughing at the look on Tom’s face. I leaned around him, and leveled a glare at the large man standing behind Tom. Alex was standing there, his arms crossed across his large chest. He had the build of a line backer. He was massive. His baby face was the only thing that made him seem not as threatening. That and his hot pink scrubs.

“Good morning, Alex. What are you doing out here?” I asked him, stifling a laugh.

“Waiting for you to bring me my morning coffee so I don’t have to drink that sludge that Karen makes. What do I see when I look out the window? I see this fancy ass car pull up, and this guy,” He pointed his meaty paw at Tom, “Groping you in the middle of the parking lot. What the fuck happened to your face, Rose?” He demanded when he could finally see my whole face, turning to Tom, menacingly.

“Oh, no. No, no, no. Down boy. It’s not what you’re thinking. Didn’t Martha call you? I would have thought you would have been top of her list.“ I said, putting a hand on his massive chest.

“We went away for the weekend….Explain. Now.” He barked.

I sighed. _Fucking men._ I thought.

“Long story short, John attacked me the other night, Tom saved me. He’s the good guy. Simmer down, Beef Steak.” I said, getting a corner of his mouth to curve up.

“Alex, I want you to meet Tom. Tom, this is Alex. My work husband.” I said, looking at Tom, who so far, had not said a word, was just staring at this giant in pink scrubs, who I had just affectionately called Beef Steak. Alex stared at Tom for a few moments longer, then reached out his massive hand towards him. Tom looked at it, then reached out and shook it, a smile starting to come to his face.

“Do I know you from somewhere?” Alex asked, narrowing his eyes at Tom suspiciously.

“You may have seen me around.” Tom said, chuckling.

“Were you ever in prison?” Alex asked.

“No, Alex, he’s never been in prison, you ding bat. Alex used to be a nurse at the state prison before he came to work here,” I explained to Tom, who was looking more and more incredulous. “Tom's an actor, Alex. Maybe you’ve seen one of his movies.” I said. Alex squinted his eyes at Tom, and a look of dawning comprehension crossed his face.

“Pine.” He said in awe. “Holy shit. You’re Jonathan Pine. Rose, why are you with Jonathan Pine?” He asked.

“Not Pine, just Tom.” Tom said laughing.

“Of course. Of course. I know that. Rose, where…” Alex said, looking at me like he had never seen me before.

“Ok, well, Tom has to go now,” I interrupted him, “So if you don’t mind, Alex, I’ll be inside in a few.” I said, trying to shooing him away.

“Actually, darling, if you don’t mind, I’d like to have a word with Alex.” Tom said, flashing a smile at me.

“Ok…. Ill see you tonight then?” I asked.

“Yes, love.” He leaned down and kissed me goodbye. I started walking into the building, looking over my shoulder at the two men staring at my retreating back. I hurried into the office and over to the reception desk, where our secretary, Karen was staring out the window at them.

"Jesus Christ, Rosie! What the hell happened to your face?” She gasped when I came in. She reached out to touch my face and I batted her hand away.

“Long story, Karen. I’ll tell you later. Can you tell what they are talking about?” I said, peering out the window. Tom was gesturing towards the woods at the sides and back of the building, then at his car. Alex had his arms crossed across his chest again and was nodding. They pulled out their phones and seemed to be exchanging numbers.

As they were talking, a minivan pulled up next to Tom’s car. A small, middle aged woman got out and proceeded to get two toddlers and an infant in a carrier seat out of the back. The toddlers ran at Alex and each grabbed a leg. He waved the mother towards the building.

“Mrs. Miller has an appointment this morning?” I asked Karen.

“Yes, she called Doc over the weekend. She’s had a nasty cough for over a week, I guess, but didn’t want to take anything because she’s still nursing. So he told her to come in first thing.” Karen said over her shoulder as she bustled over to her desk as Mrs. Miller came in the door.

“That Alex, the boys love him so much! He’s so good to them, it’s no wonder. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s giving them candy.” Mrs. Miller said, as she dissolved into a racking cough.

“Oh, Mrs. Miller, you sound horrible! Let me just throw my stuff at my desk and I’ll come grab you.” I said, as I hurried out back. When I came back out to the waiting room, Alex was inside with the Miller boys. He waved her over to me, saying that he’d watch the boys while Doc saw her. We left them watching Sesame Street.

“Rosie,” She said as I shut the door of the exam room, “Who was that?” She leaned forward, grinning.

“Oh, that’s Tom.” I said, trying to avoid anymore questions by shoving a thermometer in her mouth. She waited until it beeped, then pulled it out, looking at it.

“101.8. Oh my god, he is gorgeous! Please tell me he’s your new boyfriend? Because I will die happy knowing someone I know got to touch a man like that!” She laughed, then started coughing again.

“I’m going to go grab Doc so he can take a listen to those lungs, Mrs. Miller.” I said quickly, leaving the room and shutting the door behind me. I shook my head, smiling. I walked down the hall and poked my head into Dr. M’s office.

“Hey, Rose. How are you feeling?” He asked, looking at the bruise on my face.

“I’m fine. I take it Martha got a hold of you?” I asked him.

“No, actually, it was Norma. She called me yesterday about Sarah. She was concerned the she had a urinary tract infection, she’s had some mental status changes. She said that Sarah has been talking a lot more about Teddy, since she met your new fella. She told me about what happened, and how this famous movie star saved your life. I was a little worried about her mental status, to be honest, but then not ten minutes later, I got a call from General Frashburn. He wanted me to know that John had gotten out on bond. Why didn’t you call me and let me know what happened, Rose? We’ve worked together, and been friends long enough that I thought that you would let me know about something like this!” He said, looking a little hurt.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think of calling anyone. I figured I would tell you about it today and don’t worry about John. He won’t come here.” I said, not knowing what to say to him, feeling guilty.

“I’m not worried about him, if he dared show his face here, Alex would tear his arms off, and that would be if I didn’t get to him first. So who’s this Tom? From what the General says, he’s a great guy.” He said.

“He is. He’s too good for me, I think.” I said quietly, getting a little choked up, as Alex came in the room.

“Rose. What the fuck! Why didn’t you call me?” He said, accusingly.

“Oh, for crying out loud, not you too!” I huffed. I turned and walked out of the room, leaving them alone to trade stories. The day finally fell into its normal routine. When it was time for lunch, I pulled out my phone to see I had two text messages from Tom.

_Miss you, darling :)_  

_How’s your day?_

I smiled at my phone and text him back. _I miss you too. I wish we were still at my apartment. It’s busy. How’s yours?_

_Do you now? Let’s see… What could we be doing right now if we were all alone in your bedroom?_ He shot back.

I looked up from my phone with a goofy grin on my face, to find Alex leaning against the counter, watching me through squinted eyes.

“You are head over heels, my dear girl.” He accused me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I tried to deny it.

“Oh, please!! Not that I blame you. He’s the man. Not only is he, like, one of the hottest actors out there right now, but he seems like an actual stand up guy. And he seems pretty smitten with you, too.” He smiled. My phone buzzed, and I looked down to see a reply from Tom.

_I wish I had the time to list the things I’m going to do to you later, but I would be here all day. Alex is going to drive you home later, ok?_  

I looked up at Alex. “You’re bringing me home?” I asked him.

“Oh, ah, yeah. Tom told me about your tires. He said that you would need a lift home, because he wasn’t going to get back here by five.” He said, as he helped himself to half of my sandwich.

“Doesn’t your boyfriend make you lunch?” I asked, swatting at his hand, and losing my apple in the process.

“He’s away for a few days, business trip. Didn’t go shopping before he left.” Alex said, his mouth full of said apple.

“Are you guys going to the benefit?” I asked, taking a bite of what was left of my sandwich. A text popped up on my phone from Tom.

_Thanks for lunch, Darling. Someone stole my apple, though._

I smiled. I typed back, _Must be the apples. Alex stole mine._

“Earth to Rose!” Alex said, as he was digging through my lunch bag, looking for more food. “That’s all you have? We’re going. I got a new tux and everything. Anthony said that my old one had moth holes. It was fine, but he likes to make me buy new clothes.” He pulled a face. “Why? Are you going to bring Mr. Movie Star?”

I reached into my desk drawer and pulled out a bag of chocolates and threw it at him. He squealed like a two year old.

“You definitely needed a new one. I thought you were going to bust out of those pants last year. Though, Norma would have been happy. She’s determined to see you naked before she dies. Its on her bucket list.” I teased. Norma had the serious hots for our nurse.

“She’s not getting any.” He laughed. “You didn’t answer me.”

“I was thinking of asking him. I’m not sure what “this” is, though. I’m trying not to put a label on it. I don’t know what he wants, long term.” I said, picking at the remains of my sandwich.

“Rose, I really think he cares about you. He’s definitely concerned about you. He was telling me about your tires, and how he thinks it might have been John. He wants me to bring you home tonight, because he doesn’t want you to go home alone.”

_I fucking knew it!_ I thought. _Great, now I’ve got Beef Steak the Security Guard to be up my ass until he gets home._

“I figured as much, though I am a little irritated that he didn’t think to tell me that.” I said, sulkily.

“He didn’t want you to freak out. He said that you had some nightmares, too. Have you had headaches or anything? Here, let me look at your pupils.” He said, leaning towards me, pulling out his pen light.

“Oh, no you don’t. Don’t go all nurse mode on me, Beef Steak. Come on. We’ve got patients.” I said as I jumped up and walked out front.

Norma and Sarah were just arriving for Sarah’s appointment when I got out front.

“Rosie! I’m surprised to see you here!” Exclaimed Norma.

“Why wouldn’t I be here? I’m always here!” I said to her, confused.

“I’m just surprise that you can walk after the weekend you must have had with Mr. Loki.” She cackled as she walked towards the back with Sarah. _This fucking woman will be the death of me._ I thought. Then I giggled at the look on Karen’s face and followed her.

~*~*~*~

Once we had finished for the day, Alex gave me a ride home. As we pulled up my driveway, there was a police cruiser parked next to my car. I got out and walked over to find Doug, leaning over and looking at my tires.

“Hey Rosie! How are you, sweetheart? Hey, Alex, thanks for getting her home.” He said, giving me a hug and shaking Alex’s hand.

“I’m doing fine, Doug. Why are you here?“ I asked.

“Tom called me earlier and told me about your tires. I told him I would come up and check them out. Rosie, it looks like someone did this. Looks like they were slashed. I had one of the deputies look into it and John’s parents have given him an alibi, but I don’t believe them. I want you to be careful, and not go out alone.” He gave me his best dad glare.

“Are you kidding me? Why would they lie?” I asked, but thinking to myself, _you know, his mother always hated you. She would probably help him kill you if she could._

“I don’t know, but just be careful. I’ll have someone patrol up here a few times through the night. Just to be safe.” He said, casually.

“Oh, ok. Sure. Thanks, Doug.” I said, leaning over and pecking his cheek.

“Tom said someone was coming to replace the tires, so you should be all set for the morning.” Doug said, as he clicked a few pictures of my tires.

“Wow, Rose. I think he’s really into you. He’s even taking care of your car!” Alex joked as he followed me to the front door. “That’s love, baby.”

“Are you under orders to stay here until Tom gets home?” I asked him, with a little attitude.

“Simmer down, little girl. We are all just concerned, just want to make sure you are ok. Tom really wanted to make sure you were safe. That makes him ok in my book.” He said as we walked up the steps.  
Once I got Mitch settled, we took him out for a quick walk, and went back upstairs.

“I suppose you want supper?” I asked him as I started to gather ingredients.

“Well, it would be payment for being your body guard.” He chuckled as he left the room. I started making a quick pasta dish, not really paying attention to where he went.

He came back about 10 minutes later, just as I was draining the pasta. “I checked all your windows to make sure they are locked. Can’t be too careful.” He said. I rolled my eyes.

“Alex, I’m on the second floor, and it’s like the third floor. Downstairs has 20 foot ceilings!” I stirred the veggies. Once I had fed him, I convinced him that I would be fine without him hovering around me. I did have Mitch, after all.

“I know he’s a big lover, but he hated John. I don’t think he would get more than one foot in the door before Mitch took it off.” I joked.

“Fine, but you lock that door, and I’ll lock the downstairs one on my way out. Does Tom have a key?” He asked.

I nodded.

After I saw him off. I locked the door and headed to my room. I put on a comfy sweatshirt and yoga pants, grabbed a book off the shelf and settled down to read. I didn’t make it very far before I nodded off.

_I was walking through the snowy, foggy woods again. I could see someone on the path ahead of me, on the ground. I kept trying to get closer. I could sense that they needed my help. I could hear something behind me, but every time I turned around, they were just out of my vision, pacing. I needed to get to the person on the path, before whatever it was behind me got to them. I started to run, but it was taking so long to get to them._

_“I’m coming, don’t worry, I will get to you!” I called out to the person laying on the ground, but the wind picked_ _up and carried my voice away. finally_ _, I was close enough that I could see them._

_“No!”_ I screamed, jolting myself awake.

 


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/nightmares/smutty smut/angst?

  
I woke with a start, feeling like I had fallen a long distance into my bed. I turned quickly and frantically felt the cold side of the bed that Tom had been occupying the past few nights. He wasn’t there. My bedside lamp was still on, I could see that he wasn’t there, but I was still wildly searching the blankets for him, sobbing and crying his name.

“Tom! Oh my God, Tom! Please! Fuck! Tom! Please….” I sobbed.

“Rose! Rose, what’s wrong?” I whipped my head up at the sound of his voice, my eyes wildly searching for him. He was standing in my bedroom doorway, his coat still on and snow in his hair. I launched myself off the bed and threw myself at him, desperately pulling his coat open and his shirt up. I ran my hands over his chest, making sure he wasn’t injured. The nightmare had been so vivid, felt so real, it was still with me.

Having assured myself that he was fine, I began to cry harder, and would have sunk to the ground had he not caught me.

“Darling, tell me what happened. Was it another nightmare?” He asked softly, as he gathered me in his arms and carried me to the large overstuffed chair in the corner. He sat with me cuddled in his lap.

“I’m so-so-sorry.” I whispered into his chest. “I’m so sorry.”

“Shhh. It’s alright, I’m here.” He said, as he began rubbing my back, and hugged me closer. “Tell me about the dream.”

“It was so horrible… I couldn’t help…them.” I sobbed.

“Who, darling? Who were you trying to help? What happened?” He asked, though I think he knew, given the fact that I nearly ripped his clothes off him a few minutes earlier.

“I can’t. I don’t want to say it.” I said, burying my face in his chest, inhaling his scent. It was having a calming effect on me. I slowly stopped crying, and he just held me, slightly rocking.

“Tell me about it, Rose.” He did not ask this time.

I took a shaky breath and pulled back so I could look at his face. He was looking at me with nothing but warmth and concern. _He really does care about your crazy ass. Just tell him_. I scolded myself.

“It was a nightmare… I had one like it last night, but it was just me. I was in the woods and it was foggy, I was trying to run, but couldn’t. I could feel someone was there, just out of my sight. This was similar, but there was someone ahead of me on the path, on the ground. I kept trying to get to them, to help them. I couldn’t get close enough. The thing that was hunting me was there, it was going to get them if I didn’t save them. I finally got close enough to see who it was…” I choked on the last word, tears starting to fall again.

“It’s ok, darling, no one will hurt you. Was it me? On the path?” He asked gently. I nodded. He pulled me closer and held me tight, kissing the top of my head.

“You were… there was blood, and I couldn’t stop it…I woke up, but I thought, I thought….” I sobbed.

“I’m fine, love. I’m sorry, I should have been here sooner.” He kissed my forehead.

“No. Don’t feel like you have to be here to.. I don’t know, save me from my dreams. It’s not your problem, is it?” I finished lamely. He looked at me, his face stern.

“Rose, that’s how a relationship works. You are there for each other. Coming in and seeing you tearing the bed apart, crying my name, it ripped my heart out, and to be quite honest, scared the shit out of me. If I had been here, I could have woken you up before it got to that point. Or at least been there when you reached out for me.” He looked pained at the thought of me waking up, scared and alone.

He wiped the tears from my eyes and just held me. His coat was still on, the wool rough on my face. I didn’t mind. It was real. He was here, he was safe. Eventually, I moved so that I was straddling him, so I could look into his eyes. He touched my cheek and kissed my nose.

“There’s supper in the fridge, if you’re hungry.” I told him, as I began removing his coat.

“I’m not hungry right now, but thank you. Maybe later?” He smiled at me as I began working the buttons on his shirt. I was moving quickly, my hands shaking slightly. He put his hands over mine, stilling them.

“Darling, are you sure?” He asked, looking into my eyes, so I had to tell the truth. He could tell if I didn’t.

“I need to be close to you right now, does that make sense?” I said quietly, and I began moving my hands over his buttons again. He nodded and stood up, taking me with him. He brought me over to the bed, setting me down in the middle. He took his shirt the rest of the way off, kicked off his shoes and climbed on the bed. He knelt in front of me and tugged off my sweatshirt. He reached over to me, pulled me down to lay next to him. He was running his fingers along my back as I caressed his chest.

_I love him. I really love him. I can’t believe that I love him, but I do. I would do anything this man asked me to and I’m not even frightened by that, and I think I should be. But I don’t care. Because I think he just might love me a little, too._ I pondered.

“You look so serious. What are you thinking about?” He whispered. I stared at him for a moment, wondering if I should really say what I was thinking.

“I want to know what your are really thinking, not what you think I want to hear.” He said.

“Can you read minds?” I laughed.

“Sometimes. It’s easy when someone’s thoughts are written all over their face. You should never play poker, my dear.” He said.

I sighed, as he leaned forward and began kissing my neck. “I, ah, that’s really nice. Um, I was thinking about you. I guess.”

“Me?” He murmured as he began moving down my neck to my chest. I arched my back to get closer to him.

“Mhmm. Oh, Tom!” I moaned.

“Yes, darling, we’ve already established, you were thinking about me. You guess. What about dear old me?” He said, as his tongue darted out and ran along the edge of my bra.

“Ah, what? Oh, I was thinking,” I brought my hands up to my face, trying to hide, because I knew he would be able to see it in my eyes. I was glad he wasn’t near my face at the moment. “I was thinking about how much… you mean to me. About how I think, maybe, I’m…”

“You’re what, love?” He questions, as he moved down my belly, to my pants. He began peeling them back, kissing my skin as it became available. He tossed my pants to the side, covering the lamp, and effectively dimming the room. He was kissing my thighs, moving closer and closer to my center. I couldn’t think straight, but my mind was screaming. _Shut the fuck up! Do not say what you were going to say! Don’t do it!!!!! I swear to God, Rose, don’t you dare!_

“Rose?” He asked, hovering above me. I looked down at him, and he raised his eyebrow in question. When I didn’t answer him, he growled, looking predatory. He grasped my panties, and in one quick motion, ripped them off. He went back to kissing my inner thighs, closer and closer. He ran his tongue along the outside of me, making me moan his name. I grasped the sheets, trying to hold on, to what I don’t know. _My sanity, probably._

He began licking and sucking, moving his tongue slowly. His hands, his beautiful hands, were grasping my thighs, pressing me open to him. He was driving me insane, I couldn’t take it.

“Tom, I can’t. I-” I cried, as he sunk his finger into me, curling it, rubbing that magical spot. I reached out and grabbed his hair, pulling him up, so he clambered up my body. He was now laying on top of me, his forearms braced on either side of my head.

“My darling Rose. So beautiful.” He said, as he dipped down and took my mouth with his. He tasted of me, and it made me groan. I could feel him at my entrance, gently pushing. He would go in a few inches, pull back out. In a little, pull back out.

“You’re killing me!” I cried, arching myself, trying to fully take him.

He wickedly smiled at me, and said, “What were you going to say earlier?”

“No! That is not fair!” I practically wailed. He chuckled and drew out again. I could see that now that I was looking closer, that he was holding himself very taut. His face was a mask of concentration. _It’s killing him, too! The fucker!_ I thought. _He’s barely hanging on… well, two can play at this game!_

I pushed at his chest, trying to get him off me. He didn’t budge at first, until he realized what I was trying to do, then he jumped back.

“Darling, are you ok?” He asked, concerned. I got up on my knees and jumped on him, tackling him back onto the bed. I was straddling him and he looked quite shocked. I gripped him and guided him into me, sinking down, until our skin met. He moaned and threw his head back, gripping my hips and bucking up, trying to get deeper than he already was. I began rocking back and forth, slowly, then stopped. His head snapped up and he looked at me. I threw him a saucy smile. I rocked forward a little bit, then stopped again.

“Oh, I see. Ok, then.” He said through gritted teeth. He grabbed my hips, and flipped me over, onto my stomach. He grasped my waist, pulling me up and back, so that I was on my knees. He stuffed a pillow under my head, and entered me in one quick motion. He began pumping hard. His hands were gripping my hips so hard, but it felt amazing.

“Come on, love, come for me. Come for me.” He ground out, as he thrust even harder. As if on command, my body exploded around him, gripping him tightly. I heard a relieved groan, and felt him release as well. He fell down on the bed next to me, and pulled me into him, so that he was spooning me. He ran his fingers along my arm.

“You’re not going to say it, are you?” He asked quietly. I turned around in his arms, to see the look on his face. He had a small smile playing on his lips.

“Wha-what did you think I was going to say?” I asked him.

“It’s fine, Rose. You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to. I’ll say it first. I love you. I don’t care how long it’s been. I feel like I’ve found home when I ’m with you. I just wanted to see if I could make you say it first. Like I said, darling. I can read you like a book. Please, don’t ever play poker.” He chuckled.

I stared at him. _What the FUCK did he just say? Did he say… No. He couldn’t have. But he did. He said he fucking LOVES you. Oh. My. God. No. Yes. No. YES!_ My heart was arguing with my mind.

He was watching me closely. Those amazing blue eyes of his seeing my internal struggle, and just waiting patiently for me to finish. He began playing with my hair, wrapping it around his long fingers.

“Tom, I… You know I…Well, you just said… And I…” I floundered for the words.

“You’re very cute when your flustered, do you know that?” He laughed, dusting kissed on my forehead.

I grabbed his face, making him stop and look at me. I looked into his eyes, and smiled. “I love you, too.” I said.

He smiled and kissed me deeply. He pulled me close to him, and sighed contentedly.

“So, what’s for dinner?” He asked, chuckling.

~*~*~*~

When my alarm clock went off in the morning, I groaned, hitting it, none too gently.

“I don’t wanna.” I said into my pillow. Tom pulled me close to him and kissed my neck.

“I don’t want to either, my love, but we must.” He said as he got up from the bed, stretching and headed into the bathroom. I watching him go in amazement. _Wow. just fucking WOW. That is mine._ I thought, shaking my head. I reluctantly got up and began getting ready.

We said goodbye in the driveway, kissing each other for far too long.

“I don’t think I’ll be back tonight, love.” Tom said sadly.

“Oh?” I said, trying to keep my heart out of my voice.

“Its supposed to snow tonight and the director wants to get a scene in with it. So if it does, I’ll be there really late, I might as well just stay there tonight. I’ll miss you terribly.” He said, kissing me again.

I pulled back and smiled at him, “Its fine. Don’t worry about me, I’ll still be here tomorrow!” I said lightheartedly. Inside I was dying.

“Rose… We will make this work. I promise. I’ll be back."

“Tom, please, don’t make promises that you can’t keep. We will try, I know we will, but don’t promise. You have no way of knowing what will happen.” I said, looking at the ground. He gripped my arms and pulled me closer to him. His hand gently tilted my chin so I was looking at him.

“I promise.” He said fiercely. “Don’t start with this right now, Rose. I’m a man of my word, don’t forget that.”

“I do really love you, you know that?” I asked him.

“I do. I love you to, darling. Have a good day. Be careful. I texted Alex, he said that he will follow you home tonight. Just to make sure. I don’t like the idea of you coming home alone.”

“I’ll be fine. It was just a fluke thing, the tires. I don’t think it was John. Kids, or something.” I said

“Poker face, Rose.” He chided, as he grabbed his brown lunch bag from me and pecked my lips once more. I watched him get into his car, and turned to get into mine. I thought I heard twigs breaking in the woods off to the side of the carriage house. I looked around carefully, but didn’t see anything. I got into my car and headed to work.

~*~*~*~

It was a long day. Alex was in a mood, and was blaming it on me, saying I was sulking. He was sitting at his desk, his feet up on the desktop, lounging back in his chair.

“The man’s gotta work, Rose! You don’t see me being all bitchy every time Anthony has to go away for work! And what are you going to do when he has to go somewhere far away for months for a project? I’m not trying to be an asshole, Rose, I just want you to think about what you’re getting into. Tom’s great, but you have to realize his life is totally different than ours. He doesn’t work a nine to five.” Alex said, watching as I was digging around in my desk, looking for candy.

“Did you eat all of my candy?” I snapped at him.

“See! This is what I’m saying! It’s not like you to be angry about me eating your candy! That’s it, I’m calling Martha.” He said as sat up straight, reaching for his phone. I jumped up and grabbed him by the neck of his scrub top, lime green today, brining him up to my level.

“You will do no such thing. I’m fine. I’m great, actually. Never been better. I just didn’t sleep good last night, and I would appreciate if you would do two simple things for me.” I snarled at him.

“What?” He squeaked.

“First, go to the fucking store and get me some more chocolate. Secondly, butt the hell out.” I said, deathly calm.

Doc came around the corner with the General at that moment.

“Well, that’s not something you see everyday!” The General hooted, looking at the odd scene in front of him.

“Rose, could you please refrain from maiming Alex and give the General his b12 shot?” He said, like it was no big thing to see his five foot five medical assistant gripping the shirt of his six foot five nurse, snarling in his face like a honey badger.

“Sorry, General, Alex can do it. I have to run out.” I said, snatching my purse off my desk and walking away. I needed to get out of there.

“Rose! You aren’t supposed to go out alone!” Alex called after me. I threw my middle finger up at him on my way out the door.

_What the fuck Rose? What is wrong with you? It’s not their fault that you are all fucked up in the head! Its like I don’t even know you anymore… and you’re me!_ I scolded myself as I got in my car and turned it on. I drove down the road to the store and spend twenty minutes in the candy aisle.

“You alright, Rose?” Asked the clerk, who was, of course a patient.

“I’m fine, Sue. These are for Alex, he’s having a bad day.” I lied, perusing the magazines.

“Oh, is Anthony out of town again?” She giggled.

“Yeah…” I said absentmindedly as my eyes fell on a tabloid that had a very familiar face on the front.

“This too, Sue. Alex loves trash magazines. Ought to cheer him up a little.” I said as I threw it on the pile.

I hurried back to my car and ripped the magazine out of the bag, scanning the front.

Up in the top right corner, was Tom, coming out of a building, smiling at the cameras as he led some beautiful woman by the hand.

_“Tom and Isabelle - Engagement Rumors!”_ It said in big red letters. I stared at it, in shock, the tears already streaming down my face.

 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/ angst / nightmares

 

I drove back to work and parked my car. I sat there, staring into the woods, not really seeing them. My phone went off, making me jump. It was Tom. I hit the silent button, laughing a little at the irony. I looked at the offending publication sitting on my pile of candy. _The magazine came out almost a month ago, it must not be true, right? I mean, everyone knows that tabloids are crap, right? Right. He wouldn’t do that. Would he?_ I thought. _He couldn’t tell me he loved me and be engaged to another woman, or even in a relationship with another woman. You know him better that, Rose. But do I? It’s been a week! A fucking week and you think you know this man’s character? Yes, god damn it. I do._

I had stopped crying. I was just zoned out, staring at the windshield when someone knocked on my window making me jump. It was Alex. He was bent down, his face level with mine. He looked pissed.

“What the fuck, Rose?” He hissed at me through the window. “You know better than to be out on your own! If something happened, Tom would have a conniption! He’d kill me if you got hurt!“

“Don’t worry about Tom. I’m a grown woman, Alex. I don’t belong to him. I can go to the store on my lunch break by myself. I needed chocolate, some asshole ate all of mine.” I said, holding up my bags. He stared at me, either dumbfounded at the amount of candy I had purchased or that I had just called him an asshole. I opened the door, pushing him out of the way. I gathered my things, not looking at him. I left him standing there and went back into the office. I sat at my desk, and put on my headphones, effectively tuning everyone out with my iPod on shuffle.

We didn’t have any patients on Tuesday afternoons. It was the day I usually caught up on paperwork. I threw myself into the world of prior authorizations, prescriptions, pre-op paperwork and the like. I ate way too much candy, the pile of wrappers growing larger by the minute. I could see Alex at his desk from the corner of my eye. He was watching me and texting on his phone. I had a feeling I knew who he was texting. I was typing away, when Karen came to the counter in front of my desk with a vase of flowers. The most heart wrenchingly beautiful lilacs that I had ever seen. She placed them on the counter and waved the card at me. I sighed and pulled off my headphones.

“Read it! Who could it be from? How on earth did he find them at this time of year?” She giggled. _I love Karen, I really do, but I want to throat punch her._ I ripped open the envelope and looked over at Alex, who was watching me closely. I looked down at the little card.

_I Promise. Love, Tom._

I looked at the lovely, delicate light purple flowers. My favorite. How had he known? _Probably Alex._ I reached for the vase, and pulled it down so I could inhale the beautiful scent. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.

“I need to go.” I said, as I stood up, grabbing my coat off the back of my chair. I pulled it on, grabbing my purse, and making my way toward the door.

“Rose, wait. Let me get my keys. I’ll follow you.” Alex said, standing.

“No.” I snapped. I took a deep breath and smiled at my dear friend, who was only trying to help me. “No, Alex. Thank you. I'll be fine. I swear. I'll text you when I’m home.” I said, more kindly.

“But Rose, what if John’s there? What if something happens to you? I'd never forgive myself for not going.” He said, grabbing his coat and keys.

I sighed. “Fine. Lets go then,.” I said, leaving the flowers on the counter, and walking out the door.

Alex followed me home, and we passed a patrol car on the way up my driveway, who waved at me as he drove by. When I parked my car, Alex got out of his and said that he would walk Mitch for me. I didn’t argue. I was exhausted. After he had brought Mitch back up, he stopped in the kitchen.

“Rose, I don’t know what happened, but if you need to talk, I’m here, ok?” He said, his hand on the doorknob.

“Thanks, Alex. I really do appreciate it. I don’t know what happened, either. I’m fine. I’ll be fine.” I said, reaching up and kissing his cheek.

“You keep saying that, but you have a terrible poker face, you know that?” He asked.

“Someone told me that once, yes.” I said sadly.

After he left, I grabbed a bottle of wine, put on some PJs and grabbed a big comfy blanket and curled up on my overstuffed chair with my tablet. I checked my phone. Another missed call from Tom, and three texts. I decided that I should probably read them.

_Miss you darling._  
_Are you ok?_  
 _Rose… please let me know that you are ok._

I listened to the voicemail. "Hello darling, I’m trying really hard not to be the weird, clingy new boyfriend, but I’m getting a little worried. Please just let me know that you're alright. Love you.”

I text him back.

_I’m fine. Tired, going to bed. Talk to you tomorrow. I love you._

I hesitated before I hit send. I did love him, but did I want to say it right now? I sighed, and I hit send.

Right away, my phone went off with another message from him.

_Thank you. I was worried. I love you too darling. Sleep well. I’ll see you tomorrow._

I threw my phone to the side, gabbing my tablet. I sat there looking at the home screen for a bit. Even though Tom was a movie star, I didn’t know him in that light. I felt like I was snooping. I drank another glass of wine, and opened the search engine. I typed in his name, and was shocked by how many results came up. I scrolled through it a bit, then I clicked on his IMDb page. I told a brief history of his life, which he had already told me more about than what was written. I scrolled over to his filmography, seeing the films that had been mentioned by Norma and Alex.

_The War Horse… Ah._ _That’s where I’ve seen him!_ I knew he had looked vaguely familiar. Years ago, Alex had dragged me to see that movie. It had been a night out with him, before he met Anthony. There had been a lot of alcohol involved. I remembered that his character dies, and it was a heart wrenching scene, beautifully done. I remembered Alex crying like a baby.

I browsed a bit more, then logged onto YouTube. I typed in his name. I began watching videos of him. Interviews, mostly. Some clips from movies. He was, apparently, very good at impressions. There were more than a few of him dancing.

_Holy shit! Snake hips, indeed!_ I thought, giggling. I watched him charm the audiences and the interviewers. I saw a link for a play he had done, Coriolanus. It was a lesser know Shakespeare play, that I was pretty sure I had read for a college course.

I clicked the play button and snuggled down into my blanket. I was transfixed. He was incredible, so amazingly talented. His soul was on display for everyone in that theater. He was beauty in action. I was falling in love with him, with Tom Hiddleston, the actor. _Was that who I had fallen in love with? The actor?_ I don’t think so. While part of me was screaming, _He’s a liar! This is what he does for a living. Makes people believe lies. He was using you! You were just a convenient piece of ass!_ The majority of me was screaming right back. _No! He is not that kind of man. I know it in my soul! He said he loves me, and he means it._  
I took the tablet and carried it to my bed, curling up with it, wishing it was really him, not Caius Martius, who was in my bed with me. I drifted off to sleep watching him.

_I was in the woods again. The fog was so thick, that I couldn’t see anything more than five feet away. I could hear a woman, laughing. I tried to call out to her, but her laughter only increased, turning cruel. The fog was thinning ahead, I could see someone on the path. My stomach roiled as I noticed a woman standing over the person on the path, her head tossed back in manic laughter._

_“Help him!” I screamed. She turned to look at me. She was the woman from the magazine, but she wasn’t. That woman had been beautiful, young, vibrant. This woman was scary. Her face was stretched taut in a sickly grin. She looked old, with tons of makeup caked on her face._

_“You can’t have him. He’s gone.” She said is a slow, cracking voice._

_“No, he promised. He promised!” I cried._

_“Promises!” She shrieked. “Nothing more than words, girl. You know better than that. Save yourself, before it finds you. It is approaching.”_

_I whipped my head around. I couldn’t see anything, but I could hear the snapping twigs just beyond my sight, in the fog._

_“No, I can’t leave without him!” I called, turning back, but they were both gone._

I sat straight up in bed, crying out as I woke.

I put my head in my hands saying, “What the fuck!”

I wished Tom were there. He would have held me and made me feel so safe. I pulled my legs up to my chest, rested my head on my knees and sobbed.

~*~*~*~*

Morning didn’t come soon enough. I could not get back to sleep after that horrible dream. I finished watching Coriolanus. I also watched what seemed like a million more interviews. I had been avoiding anything that had her name on it. I felt that he should be the one to tell me if he was really engaged or what the story was.

I dragged myself to the bathroom and got ready for work. I pulled out a pair of black scrubs, and paired it with a black and pink stripped long-sleeved shirt under it. I dug out a pair of black sneakers. _Black, like my soul._ I let out a harsh laugh as I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. I looked like shit.

I made my lunch and took Mitch out for a quick walk. As I was walking him, I noticed foot prints in the snow. They came out of the woods and went around the back of the carriage house. As I was studying them, a big, brown, old pickup clanked up the driveway. I smiled and waved, holding Mitch back as he began to wiggle and whine. The pickup stuttered to a halt, and the General rolled down his window.

“Rosie, my darling girl. I just came to check up on you. You sure looked like you were going to lay out Alex yesterday.” He chuckled.

“He ate all my chocolate. Hi Stewart!” I said to his passenger. “Going to get coffee?” I asked the General.

“You know it. Listen, Tom called me this morning, asked me to drive by and make sure everything was locked up tight. I didn’t mention to him about your going out by yourself yesterday.” He said in a scolding tone.

“Oh, not you too!” I huffed. I was tempted to stamp my foot. “I’ve had about enough of all you, _you MEN_ , trying to direct my life. I know that you all have my best interests at heart, but I am a grown woman! And Tom is not my keeper. There is no reason for him to call you, or for you to tell him anything about what I do.” I turned and stalked back to the door.

“Rosie, don’t be like that!” the General called after me. I could hear the door of the truck open, and heard him grunt as he hopped down. _Why that stubborn ass continues to drive that ridiculous truck is beyond me. He can’t get into the fucking thing without almost losing his prosthetic._ I though viciously. _Whoa, simmer down there Rose. He only means well. They all only mean well._ I said to myself. It was like good angel, bad angel.

“Rosie, wait!” The General called. I only stopped because I didn’t want to deal with it if he fell and broke his hip.

“What?” I asked, turning on him.

“Tell me.” He said, standing with his hands on his hips, looking daggers at me.

“Tell you what?” I asked, peevishly.

“Tell me what has you acting like this. This isn’t you. Something happened. Being upset with Alex yesterday. Going out by yourself when you know that there is good reason not to. Being, well, like this towards me. Its not you. So tell me. Did something happen with Tom? Did he do something to hurt you?” He demanded.

“No, he didn’t do anything. I’m just feeling claustrophobic. I’m sorry. I know you guys just care and don’t want to see me get hurt. I guess I’ve just gotten used to doing what I want, when I want.” I said, not willing to tell the General about the tabloid. “Listen, I’ve got to get Mitch back upstairs and get to work. I’m late as it is. Thank you for coming up to check.” I reached up on my toes and gave him a peck on the cheek. I turned and left him standing there and ran Mitch up the stairs, grabbed my purse and lunch and headed back out, locking the doors behind me. When I got outside, the truck was gone and the footsteps were forgotten.

When I got to work, the lilacs were still on the counter in from of my desk. I took the vase and moved it out into the waiting room. When I came back, Alex was sitting in my seat.

“Yes?” I asked tartly.

“Oh, nothing. Just came over to say hi.” He said, spinning around in my chair. “Anthony’s home. He wants to go to Harvey’s tonight. Its been forever since you came out with us. Wanna come?” He asked, giving me the puppy dog eyes.

“I don’t know, Alex. Tom-” I stopped. Did I want to be available when he decided to show up? I tapped my pen on the counter, debating.

_Maybe I should go out, not be there when he gets home. It’s not his home, Rose. It’s your home, and he has just been sleeping there… sleeping with you, there._ My inner asshole so nicely reminded me.  
I smiled at Alex.

“Sure. Count me in.”

 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/drinking/bad karaoke/a homophobic,verbally abusive asshole/Angst/fluff  
> I don’t own My Church by Maren Morris (obviously), I just sing it when I drink too much and my work hubs makes me.

  
Thinking about going out with Alex and Anthony got me through the rest of the day. My phone went off periodically, but I didn’t check it. I knew I was acting like a twit, but I couldn’t make myself look. I don’t know if I was more scared of what it would say, or what it wouldn’t say. After we had finished for the day, Alex and I cleaned up the office. As I walked around, changing the table papers in the exam rooms and shutting off the lights, Alex popped up in the doorway of the last room.

“Why don’t you just come with me and I can give you a lift home later? You can leave your car here and I’ll come grab you in the morning.” Alex offered. I thought that was a good idea, so I followed him to his car after we locked up. His phone went off as we were getting in. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at it, texting a reply.

“Anthony going to be late?” I rolled my eyes. He was always late. “Is this button duct taped on? When are you going to get a new car?” I asked as I fiddled with the radio.

“What? Oh, no. No. He’s meeting us there. And I love this car. I love this car more than I love you. Don’t peel that off!“ Alex said, distracted, swatting at my hand.

Harvey’s was right down the street from the office. The small bar was cozy and welcoming. The owner, Harold, had a knack for making it a fun night for everyone. He would do trivia and karaoke. Football games were always a huge deal. Alex and I used to go together on Thursday nights before I had met John. Harold always used to give me a shot on the house if I would sing. He never would tell us why the name of the bar was Harvey’s, not Harold’s.

We walked in to a chorus of “Alex and Rosie!” from the people at the bar. Quite a few of them were patients. Harold waved at us from his spot behind the bar.

“Guys! Over here!” Anthony was waving from the back, at a high rise table. When we reached him, he jumped down and pulled me into a big hug. He was almost as tall as Alex, but not as, well, beefy. He must have come from work, because he was wearing a vest over a white button up shirt, the sleeves rolled up his forearms, his jacket was on the back of his chair.

“Oh, Rose! My sweetling, Rose! How long has it been?” He asked, squeezing me even tighter. Anthony always gave the best hugs.

“Oh, I don’t know, Tone. Two weeks?” I said into his chest. He chuckled and let me go, holding me at arms length and smiling at me.

“Feels like longer, my darling. Now, listen. Alex was telling me some very interesting bedtime stories last night, Little Girl.” He went to ruffle my hair and I ducked away and hopped up on one of the chairs.

“Alex, Rosie, the usual?” Harold called from behind the bar. Alex gave him a thumbs up.

“I have no idea what he’s been telling you, but its all lies.” I smiled.

“Well, I thought it was a little crazy that _THE Mr. Tom Hiddleston_ would be out in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the night, and at a Target, no less.” He smirked at me. “I didn’t want to believe him, thought all that chocolate had finally rotted his brain, yes I know about the chocolate, dear, no point in denying it.“ He said when Alex quickly looked up from his phone and opened his mouth to protest.

"Imagine my surprise when out of the blue last night, we got a phone call from this lovely sounding British man, who identified himself as Tom, and asked if he could please speak to Alex.”

“Why did he call you?” I asked, rounding on Alex.

“Simmer down, Rose. He just wanted to check on you because you hadn’t answered him. You’re acting like a spiteful teenager, if you ask me. I only told him that I followed you home and made sure you were ok before I left.” Harold came over with our drinks. 2 beers and 2 shots of Fireball.

“You kids want a burger or anything?” He asked, plunking a shot and beer in front of me.

“Oh, Harold, I think just the beer.” I said, pushing the shot back, it had been a while since I’d had anything strong.

“Oh no, shoot it, bitch.” Alex said, pushing it back. I narrowed my eyes at him. Alex and I both slapped the table with our hand and threw back the shots.

“There’s our Rosie!” Harold yelled, resulting in some cheers from my fans at the bar. “We’ve missed you around here.” He said.

“Burgers all around, Harold. Thanks.” Anthony said. After Harold had walked away, he leveled a stare at me and pushed his shot towards me. “Shoot and Spill, pipsqueak. Alex said that you were bouncing around the office like a lovesick school girl, and then the next day, you tried to kill him. Did something happen between you and His Royal Hotness, or is it just all this crap with John? You can talk to me. I’m the sensitive one.” He joked.

Alex was playing with his phone, not paying attention. I drank the shot and then I drank my beer in silence, wondering if I should tell them about what I had seen, and how much of a fool I felt like. After a minute, Anthony started tapping the table impatiently.

“Tone, I love you, you know that right?” I asked him, already feeling a little warm from the shots and the beer.

“Of course you do. And if I liked women that way, I would have married you by now, that’s how much I love you. However, that is neither here, nor there. What’s the story, no more distractions with love declarations please.” He chuckled. I sighed. I put my hand up to signal Harold I wanted another round of shots.

“I fell in love with someone who I’m not sure I should have. He’s perfect, well, no ones perfect, but you know what I mean. He says that we can make it work. He promised that we can make it work.” Harold dropped off the shots and another beer, patting me on the back as he walked by. I smiled at him. “You know how I feel about promises, Tone.” I said, staring into my beer.

“Yeah, you’re the most unromantic hopeless romantic I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet. So what happened, the poor bastard promised to try to make it work, and you freaked out? Cried hysterically, started quoting Romeo and Juliette, called things off?” He asked, passing around the shots. We all slapped the table and threw back the shots.

“No…” I looked at Alex, surprised he wasn’t interrupting, getting all fussy that I hadn’t shared any of this with him. He was typing on his phone. Anthony made a motion with his hands indicating for me to continue.

"Come on, Rosie…” He prodded.

“Oh, God, Tone. I don’t even know if I should be upset with him. I feel like an idiot, but I was so mad yesterday. First, I was already in a crappy mood because I didn’t sleep good….I’ve been having weird dreams….And, if I’m honest, because Tom had to work last night and I knew he wasn’t coming home… back to my place, I need to stop calling it his home. Then I found out that Beef Steak here had eaten all my chocolate. Like, 3 bags! Don’t you feed him at home? So then I went to the store, and saw a tabloid….”

“Ah. You saw him on a tabloid cover with some beautiful starlet? And you automatically assumed that what they wrote was true?” He asked. I felt like a dumbass.

“Well, I kinda had an argument with myself about that. Part of me wanted to let him tell me was the truth was, but the other part assumed it was true.” I said, looking away. Truth be told, I was embarrassed by how childish I had been. Tom had text me several times during the day, and I hadn’t answered him.

“Well, I don’t blame you, however, you should give the poor man the benefit of doubt. From what Alex said, he really cares about you, and he’s actually seems like a great guy.” Anthony reached across the table and squeezed my hand.

“He is. I don’t deserve him. This is never going to work. I was kidding myself thinking we could make it work, even though I really, really, really want it to work. I don’t know why he even wants me. I’ve been trying to push him away since we met. I’ve ignored him for the past two days.” I leaned back in my chair, squeezing the bridge of my nose.

“Maybe you should text him.” Alex piped in, trying to look innocent. I narrowed my eyes at him as I grabbed my phone. There was a text from Tom.

_See you soon, Love. Miss you._

I smiled a little. I typed back.

_I miss you. I’m not home, but I’ll be there soon._

“See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Alex smirked. Harold had come back over and put a shot and a wireless microphone in front of me on the table.

“We're getting requests, Rosie.”

“Oh, Harold, no. I haven’t done that in so long, I don’t think it would be a good idea.”

“Come on Rosie,” He said loudly, catching the attention of the bar flies. They all started yelling for me to sing a song.

“Yeah, come on Rosie!” Alex and Anthony joined in.

“Do Maren Morris!” Called Sue from the store, who was over at another table.

“Fine, just one, though.” I said, slapping the table and throwing back the fireball Harold had brought me. Harold went to fiddle with the karaoke machine, putting on my song. “I can’t believe you guys really want me to do this.” I grumbled, definitely feeling tipsy. The music started to flow from the speakers and I flipped on the microphone. I cleared my throat, said “Alright, you guys asked for this, remember that!” and started to sing.

_"I’ve cussed on a Sunday, I’ve cheated and I’ve lied. I’ve fallen down from grace a few too many times. But I find holy redemption, when I put this car in drive, roll the windows down and turn up the dial"_ I hopped down from my chair and began walking in between the tables. _“Can I get a hallelujah? Can I get an amen? Feels like the Holy Ghost running through ya! When I play the highway FM. I find my soul revival, singing every single verse. Yeah I guess that’s my church!”_ I got a high five from Sue. _“When Hank brings the sermon, and Cash leads the choir. It gets my cold cold heart burning, hotter than a ring of fire. When this wonderful world gets heavy, and I need to find my escape, I just keep the wheels rolling, radio scrolling ‘til my sins wash away!”_ I walked over by the bar, singing my heart out.

I finished out the repeat courses to applause and requests for an encore. I shook my head, laughing. It actually felt good. I turned to go back to my table and stopped dead in my tracks. Sitting with Alex and Anthony was Tom.

_When the fuck did he get here? Oh no. No. No. No. Wait….He doesn’t look mad…. Why is he smiling at me like that?_ I thought. He had that huge boyish grin on his face and was looking heartbreakingly handsome, and maybe a little proud of me. He was clapping enthusiastically, yelling “Encore!” I turned and quickly walked to the hallway that led to the ladies room. I hadn’t been expecting him.

_How did he know? Oh, Alex, you son of a bitch. Ohhh, no chocolate for you, my friend, for a very long time._ I though viciously as the door slammed behind me and I went over to the mirror and looked at myself. My cheeks were bright red, my eyes were bright and the bruise on the side of my face was finally starting to fade. I had been able to cover it a little with makeup, but most of it had worn off by this time of the day.

I was definitely drunk at this point. Not sloppy, falling down and passing out drunk, but well past tipsy. I decided that since I was in there, I might as well use the facilities. I went into the stall and did my thing. I came out and was washing my hands when I heard the door open. I looked in the mirror.

“Fuck. Of course.” I thought I thought, but I said.

“Well, hello to you too, Darling.” Tom smirked from just inside the door.

“Tom, this is the ladies room. You can’t be in here.” I said frantically, realizing where we were.

“But you’re the only one in here, love. I thought I could maybe get you to talk to me, as you haven’t been returning my calls or messages.” He said calmly. No yelling, or nasty words. I don’t know what I had been expecting.

“Oh, that. Yeah. I’m sorry.” I said lamely. He looked at me, and sighed.

“Rose, what’s wrong? Alex wouldn’t tell me what happened, only that you were upset with me. What did I do? I’m sorry, whatever it was, was unintentional. I would never hurt you, you know that.”

“That bitch. He’s got such a big mouth!” I said, rolling my eyes. _Ok, maybe I’m drunker than I thought._ “Promises…” I trailed off. “Did you promise her anything? Did you promise her that you would try to make it work?” I asked quietly. He had been looking at the vending machine on the wall and snapped his head back to face me.

“Who?” He asked, his eyebrows raised.

“Her. Isabella. Did you promise her that you wouldn’t hurt her?” I asked, watching his reaction. He looked confused.

“Isabella? Why would I promise her anything? What is this about, Rose?” He demanded.

“You’re not engaged to her? Or, rather, there isn’t any reason for,” I made air quotes, “Engagement rumors?”

“What are you talking about? Are you pissed?” He asked.

“Yes, I’m pissed! You tell me that you love me, then I go to the store and see you on a tabloid holding hands with some gorgeous creature, and it says you’re practically engaged! Why wouldn’t that make me mad?” I sputtered at him. He stared at me for a second, his mouth hanging open slightly, then he started laughing, hard. He was doubled over, holding his sides. I stared at him, trying to make sense of what just happened.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Darling.” He laughed. “I meant are you drunk. I’m sorry. This is not funny.” He took a steadying breath and moved towards me, backing me up against the counter. “Rose, my love. My sweet girl. Tabloids write things about me all the time. It’s hardly ever true, unless they are saying I stopped to get a coffee. Or its about my shoes. They have some kind of fascination about my shoes. Did you really think that I could be engaged to a woman and tell you that I love you? Make love to you? Is that what you think of me? It’s no wonder you weren’t answering my calls.” He leaned forward and kissed my forehead and pulled me into a hug. I took a deep breath.

“Jesus, you smell so fucking gooooooood. Have I told you that? Ok. Maybe I'm a little drunk. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you. I just didn’t know what to think when I saw you holding hands with some woman, an absolutely beautiful woman, and it said in big red letter “Engagement Rumors. Underlined. With little hearts.” I said into his chest.

“Isabella is a striking woman. She's a dear friend. She's also a lesbian.” He chuckled, rubbing my back.

“Is she?!” I leaned back so I could look in his face, way too excited about Isabella’s sexual preference.

“Very much so.” He smiled. He leaned down to kiss me, pushing me further onto the counter so he was standing between my legs. He was running his hands up and down my thighs, making my brain go even fuzzier than it already was. The door banged open, and Sue walked in. She stopped in her tracks, stared at us, smiled, and walked back out.

“Oh, no. We have to go back out there, she’s going to tell everyone we’re doing it in the bathroom!” I groaned. “She’s the biggest gossip in town!” I said as I dragged a laughing Tom back out into the bar.

There was a round of cheers and Atta-boy’s from the bar flies. I shot them all a look and they shushed. We made our way back over to Alex and Anthony. Our burgers had arrived.

  
“Oh, I’m so hungry!” I cried as I hopped up in my chair and grabbed a french fry. Tom reached over and grabbed half my burger.

“Tom, I have to ask, where do you get your suits tailored? They always fit perfectly.” Anthony gushed.

“Ugh, clothes!” Alex grunted from behind his cheeseburger.

“Oh, Hey! That remind me. Do you have a tux?” I asked Tom, signaling to Harold for another round of shots. He shook his head at me. He knew my limit better than I did. I stuck my tongue out at him.

“I have several in fact. Is there a reason you wanted to know that, or just curiosity?” He smiled at me, his hand on my leg.

“Uhm… you have such… capable hands. Did you know that?” I said, popping another fry into my mouth, eyeballing him in a lusty way.

“Oh good lord, she’s wasted!” Alex said, throwing his hands up. “Rose, what’s happened to you? Three shots and a beer and you’re under the table.“ I started to giggle, mouthing “under the table” to Anthony, waggling my eyebrows, making him laugh. “Should have known, she hasn’t drank like that in years. She’s trying to ask you if you want to go to a benefit that we go to every year. Its for the local children’s hospital. We usually all go together. Its next Saturday.”

“Sweetheart, I would love to go to the benefit with you.” Tom said, leaning closer and whispering in my ear, “I would also love to go home and let you experience how capable my hands can be.” He leaned back, smirking at my glazed look.

“Guys, its been real. We gotta go.” I said, hopping off my chair and bumping into Anthony. “Steady, pipsqueak, his, ah, hands aren’t going anywhere. I miss happy Rose. She needs to come out more.” He said affectionately.

The bar had been its usually rowdy self, but all of a sudden, the noise level dropped. We all looked towards the door, and a group of men had just walked in. John was among them. Harold immediately went over to them and quietly spoke to John. He stared at Harold like he had three heads and then started looking around the bar. Tom moved in front of me, Alex and Anthony flanking him. John pushed Harold aside and strode over to us.

“Fairy Cakes! Long time no see. And you. Mr. Movie star. You think that you can always be the hero? That you can always be there? Why you would want that _whore_ ,” He spat, “ I can’t figure it out. Why waste your time on some small town slut? Can’t satisfy those women you meet out in Hollywood? Gotta poach on other men’s property? Or are you like these two?” He laughed nastily.

“You should leave.” Tom said, deathly calm, staring him down. John was at least a half a foot shorter.

“I’ll leave when I’m good and ready. What’s the matter, Rose? Cat got your tongue? You think he wants anything more than to get into your pants? You’re just a piece of ass, and not even a good one.” He said mockingly, trying to see me around Tom.

Tom made to move forward, but Alex got there first. He grabbed John by the front of his jacket and dragged him away from us, towards the door. His friends were all standing there watching. None of them were dumb enough to mess with a man the size of Alex. He threw him out the door, and turned towards Harold, telling him to call Doug.

“You should take her home, I think.” Anthony said, looking at me. I had frozen in place, and felt nauseous.

“Yes, I was thinking the same. Come on Darling. Let’s go home.” He said, putting his arm around me and leading me towards the door.

“It was nice to see you Rosie, please come back and see us again. You are always welcome here, you know that, right?.” Harold said. I raised my hand in acknowledgement of his comment, but couldn’t answer.

Tom peered out the window, presumably checking if they had left. Alex came over and stood next to us.

“That little piece of shit. Oh, I’d love to break his nose. Rose, are you ok, honey?” He asked, leaning down to look in my eyes.

“I’m fine, Alex, I just want to go home, I think.” I said unsteadily.

“Alex, thank you. I appreciate all your help. Rose has really good friends. It makes me feel better, know she’s with you all day.“ Tom said, shaking his hand.

“Anytime, Hiddleston.” He said gruffly, but I could tell he was pleased by the praise. I managed a small smile at him. Anthony had come over.

“Rose, my dream. Please. If you won’t listen to anyone else, listen to me. Do not go out alone again. John has lost his fucking mind, and I don’t trust that little bastard.”

“I won’t. I’m sorry I’ve been such an asshole… I don’t know why I didn’t listen to you guys. I thought he would get over it, leave me alone.” I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

“Shh, it’s ok, sweet. Just try to be safe, for us, ok?” Anthony gave me a big hug, and shook Tom’s hand. Tom lead me out into the parking lot to his car. He opened the door for me and handed me into the car. He went around and got in the driver side.

“Darling, please. I know that you are scared, but it will be ok. He will not get to you. He just violated his bail. I’m pretty sure this is what Doug has been waiting for. He will be going back to jail, and I don’t think that they will let him back out anytime soon.” He reached over and stroked my cheek. “I love you, Rose. I won’t let him touch you.” I looked at him, hoping that he was right. I sighed.

“I love you too. Can we go home? I just want to get out of here.” He nodded and put the car in drive.

 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Smut/Cookies/Kitchen Smut (I know)/Language

  
Tom pulled up in front of the carriage house and parked the car, but didn’t get out. He was looking around towards the woods on the side and in the back of the house. He must have been satisfied, because he turned the car off, got out and came around to open my door. As we were walking to the door, he kept looking back and forth, and behind us.

“Tom…” I started, but he pushed on the small of my back, moving me quicker towards the door and gently shushed me. Once we were inside, the downstairs door locked behind us, he stopped me and pulled me into a bone crushing hug.

“Darling, I’m sorry. I just wanted to get you into the house before we talked. I have a feeling that tonight was not the last we'll see of our good friend, John. I don’t like this. I don’t like it at all. I hate knowing that I can’t be with you at all times until this is over.” He said into my hair.

“Tom, I’ll be fine. It'll be ok. Doug will find him tonight and it will all be over. He’s not hiding in my woods!” I laughed, even though inside, I was freaking the fuck out.

He looked at me and smirked. “Rose. Poker face.”

“Get outta my head, Hiddleston.” I mumbled. _Who the fuck does he think he is? Reading my mind. Damn it. Its really not good how he knows exactly what I’m thinking._ I thought.

Tom took Mitch out for a quick bathroom break, making me lock the door behind him. I went into the living room and put on the local classical station and wandered back into the kitchen. I couldn’t believe this. What had started off as a shit day, had turned into a good night, only to then turn around and be a horror show. I went into the pantry and grabbed my Meme’s cookbook. I flipped to her pecan chocolate chip cookie recipe and started gathering ingredients. I needed to do something, and baking is what I did when I needed to do something. And cookies sounded good to my still semi-drunk self. I already had all the dry ingredients in the bowl when Tom and Mitch finally came back in.

Tom came and sat at the counter. His phone started to buzz and he answered it.

“It’s Doug.” He said, stealing some pecans. “No sign of him? Where could he have gone? I would appreciate that. Yes, I don’t think its a good idea either. I’m not sure she’ll like it though.” I swatted his hand with my wooden spoon, putting up my other hand in question. He waved me off.

“Oh, fuck this shit. Tom, you give me that damn phone or you put him on speaker. NOW.” I said, brandishing my spoon. He reluctantly put the phone on speaker and placed it on the counter.

“Doug, what the hell is going on?” I asked.

“Oh, hey Rosie. Uh, well. The thing is. We can’t find John. His truck is still at Harvey’s. I’ve got a car outside his apartment and his parents place. We’ve got the other units out looking for him, but he’s off the grid, honey. I was just saying to Tom, I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to go to work tomorrow. I’m going to put a car at your house to keep an eye on things.”

“No. I’m not missing work because he’s lost his mind. I already left work early yesterday and I’ve got too much stuff to do. I’ll be fine. Alex and Dr. M are there.” I said stubbornly.

“Rosie…” Doug started.

“No, Douglas. I appreciate what your doing, I really do. But I’m not becoming a recluse. I’m going to go on living my life.” I looked at Tom. He was staring at me with a look on his face that I couldn’t quite figure out. He looked like a mixture of disappointed and worried, with a touch of fear thrown in. Doug sighed.

“I was afraid that’s how you would take this. Rosie, we just want you to be safe. I was talking to John’s friends. Even they were concerned for you. He’s lost his mind. They said he’s been talking about you like you’re still together. Saying you’ve been cheating on him and that you need to be put back into your place, taught a lesson. If you really insist on going to work tomorrow, at least have someone drive you and pick you up. And DO NOT leave on your own. Promise me, ok?”

“Doug, I wouldn’t do anything to intentionally put myself in harms way. I will try to be a good girl.” I tried to joke. It fell flat.

“Ah, Doug. I was out walking Mitch, and there are footprints in the snow out in the back of the house. I’m not sure how long they’ve been there, but I though I should let you know.” Tom said, watching me.  
I looked down at the cookie dough, and started to spoon it out onto the cookie sheet. I had noticed the foot prints the other day, and had forgotten about them. _Had he been here?_

“I’ll let the car that’s coming up know. I’ll have them take a look. I’ll check in with you guys tomorrow, and let you know any updates.” He said.

“Ok, thanks Doug, bye.” Tom said, hanging up the phone.

I turned away from him and put the cookies in the oven. I stood there, wringing my hands, not wanting to turn around and talk to him. Not wanting to hear what he had to say. I knew that they just wanted me to be safe, but I couldn’t believe that this was happening. It was insane.

Tom stood from his stool at the counter and came behind me, putting his hands on my hips and pulling me into him, placing his chin on top of my head. He sighed.

“Darling. I know that you’re upset. I know that you feel like you have no control and that we are dictating your life. We just want you to be safe. Be mad at me, at this point, I don’t care. I just found you and I’m not losing you. You need to listen. I want you to promise me that you will do everything that you can to stay safe, because it may have passed Doug’s notice, but not mine, that you did not promise.” He flipped me around so that I was facing him. He looked, well, pissed.

_Shit. He wants me to promise. Just tell him what he wants to hear. He’ll know you’re lying anyways. The man can see right through you._

“I don’t make promises. You can’t control what happens sometimes, and if you make a promise, and have to break it because you have no control over what’s happening….. I won’t do anything stupid. You have to believe me. It’ll be fine.“ I said evasively. He narrowed his eyes and pulled me closer to him, his hands digging into my hips, crushing me into his.

“Do you feel that? Even when you make me so angry I could breath fire, I still want you. I cannot risk you getting hurt again, or losing you. You need to take this seriously Rose. It’s not a joke. He wants to hurt you.” He lifted me up so that I had to wrap my legs around his middle. “Promise me. Now, Rose. I want your word.” He growled.

“Tom…” I said, trailing off because he had started to kiss my neck, and had moved forward toward the counter so that he could free his hands. He ran them up my back and pulled me closer, nipping my neck.

“Rose. Now.” He demanded, pulling back. His eyes were boring into mine.

“Fine, I promise.” I said, as he continued his assault on my neck and chest with his kisses.

“You promise what?” He murmured.

“Oh, for fucks sake! I promise I won’t do anything stupid! I wont leave work without an escort! I promise whatever you want!” I cried as I was pulling his shirt over his head. He pulled me off the counter, and pulled down my pants as I was fumbling with his belt. He grabbed my hips and turned me around and drew his tongue up my neck to the back of my ear, nipping the shell. I heard his zipper and he gently pushed me down against the counter. He ran his hand down the part of my back that was exposed, making me shiver. He chuckled. “That wasn’t so hard, now was it?” He whispered. He cupped me from behind, pushing a finger in and causing me to gasp.

“Shit, Rose. You’re so wet.” He groaned. I pushed back onto his hand, enjoying the growl it elicited from him. He stroked me, all I could do was grip the edge of the counter as I pushed even harder back on him. He pulled his hand away, and I whimpered from the loss of his touch. I could feel him at my entrance, so I pushed back, trying to get the connection I craved.

“Ah, eager tonight, aren’t we?” He asked quietly.

“Tom!” I whined, pushing back again.

He slowly began pushing forward. It was killing me, I wanted him so badly. I was leaning against the counter, flour all over my black shirt, and I’m sure my face and hair. I gripped the edge of the counter, begging him to go faster. He finished the agonizingly slow entrance and stilled. I bucked back at him, causing him to grip my hips more tightly. He began to move, slowly, teasingly. He set a steady pace, his grip on my hips almost painfully tight.

I could feel my orgasm building already, the tension making me cry out his name. He was continuing his painfully slow thrusts, and I broke. I felt myself tighten around him, and my legs began shaking. He started to move faster, gripping me harder. I could barely breathe. Another began to build and then I broke in rapid succession. I could barely hold onto the counter.

“Your life is not yours to just play games with. I love you. You are mine, Rose. Do you understand?” He gasped. I nodded, because I couldn’t speak.

"Do. You. Understand? Answer me, Rose.” He demanded.

“Yes! God, yes!” I cried.

Finally, he grunted his release. He held me still for a moment, and then caught me as my legs gave out. He picked me up an put me over his shoulder and reached over and opened the oven door as the timer went off. He turned off the oven, grabbed a towel and removed the cookies. He carried the cookies and me to the bedroom.

~*~*~*~*

The next day I was sitting at my desk, on the phone with a hospital in Boston, attempting to get medical records on a patient of ours that was inpatient. I was humming along with the hold music, thinking about last night. Tom had been like a man possessed. It was like he couldn’t get enough of me. I giggled, thinking of the cookies. _The cookies…._

“What’s so funny?” Alex asked as he walked by with a patient. I just waved and smiled.

Tom had driven me to work and waked me into the building that morning. I had started to tell him he was overreacting, but at the look on his face I shut it. He had passed me off to Alex. I felt like a prisoner. Neither of them had laughed at my joke about handcuffs.

Tom had called me at lunch, asking me if I wanted to go to dinner, seeing as it was New Years Eve. He had made reservations at a quite place not far from my apartment. I was mentally going through my closet, trying to figure out what to wear when Alex came back over.

“Tom’s taking me to dinner tonight, Antonio’s. Should I wear my black dress, or the green one?” I asked, switching the phone to my other ear.

“The green, but wear your hair up. It has that high neckline.” He said, absentmindedly, texting on his phone.

“Is that the warden, checking in on me?” I asked.

“Jesus, Rose. Cut the man some slack. He’s only got your best interest at heart. He is concerned. We all are. You should be too.” Alex snapped. I hung up the phone and turned to face him.

“Don’t you think that I’m concerned? I’m fucking petrified, Alex. Someone wants to hurt me, possibly to kill me. Don’t think for one minute that I don’t realize the severity of this situation. But if I stop and think about it. If I let that sink in, I’m going to crack, and I can’t let that happen. If that happens, that son of a bitch wins.” I said, slamming my fist on my desk. “I wish you people would stop saying that I’m not taking this seriously.” I was getting choked up.

“Oh, Rose. I’m sorry honey. I should have known that you were taking this more seriously than you were letting on.” He said, coming over and giving me a hug. “It’ll be ok. Doug will find him, and in the meantime, you will have all your friends constantly badgering you to stay safe.” He chuckled when I let him go and punched his arm.

“Wear the black peep toes.” He said, leaving me to go out front to get a patient.

Alex had driven me home. He took Mitch for a walk for me, coming into my bedroom when he came back.

“That dog is gross. I don’t know what the hell he was just eating, but he threw it up, then tried to eat it again!” He said from the doorway.

“Ew! Is he ok?” I asked from the closet.

“Yeah, the nasty beast is fine. He drank his whole water bowl and laid down near the door. Is this the bra you’re wearing?” He asked holding up a sports bra from my bed.

“No! Put that down. I need to get ready, why don’t you just go? Tom is going to be here in a half hour. I still need to do my hair. Unless you want to do it for me, and shave my legs while you’re at it…” I said, hands on my hips as I stood in my closet. He walked across my room, looking at the bookshelves.

“Please, You shaved this morning when you took a shower!” He shot back, lounging on my overstuffed chair. “Any woman in her right mind would have if that man was sleeping in her bed. Woman, how do you read this many books? No wonder you had no idea who he was!”

I rolled my eyes and walked back into my closet. While I was digging around, looking for the peep-toes, Alex’s phone went off.

“What? Are you ok? Oh my god. Oh my god. Ok, I’ll be right there. I love you, too.” Alex said, popping his head into my closet. “Honey, I gotta go, Anthony was in a car accident. He said he’s ok, but he’s at the hospital. Are you sure you’ll be ok?” He was wringing his hands.

“Oh my god, go! Go!” I said, pushing him towards the door. “I’ll be fine. Text me when you get there and let me know how he is.”

He kissed my cheek and told me to lock the door after he left. I complied with his wishes and went back to getting ready. I found the shoes I wanted and donned my best lacy black underthings. I slipped the emerald green dress over my head and went about attempting to tame my hair into something presentable.

I was digging through my jewelry box, trying to find the earrings I wanted, when I heard a noise. I stopped and listened. A soft knock from the kitchen door. I went out into the kitchen, Mitch was still sleeping, the noise not disturbing him at all. The knock came again. A quiet voice filtered through the door.

“Rose, darling, I left my key in your room.” Sighing and rolling my eyes, I went to the door and unlocked it, pulling it open.

“Hello, darling.” John smirked, a gun pointed at me.  
******************  
Soooooo. I’m sorry about that. Have one of my Mem’s recipes.

Mem’s Pecan Chocolate Chip Cookies

3/4 cup Crisco Shortening (if you can find it, get the butter flavor)  
1 ¼ cup firmly packed brown sugar  
1 ½ tbsp. vanilla  
2tbsp. cream  
2 large eggs  
¾ tsp. baking soda  
1 ¾ cup flour  
1 tsp salt  
1 cup oats  
1 ½ cup semi-sweet chocolate chips or chunks  
1 cup roughly chopped pecans

Preheat to 375. Cream the sugar, shortening, vanilla and milk. Add eggs and beat until light and fluffy.  
Mix salt, flour and baking soda in a separate bowl and gradually add to the wet mixture.  
After combined, add in chocolate chips, pecans, and oats.  
Spoon drop onto a parchment paper lined pan and bake for 9 minutes.

Make a double batch before the next chapter, because your going to need it.

xoxo  
Nuggsmum


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really on the fence about this. When I first wrote Walnuts, this was part of my idea, but I didn’t have the confidence I think. I didn’t know if I could write the story this way, and I was really worried about triggering someone. I decided to include it, because this was part of my original vision for the story. That being said, it’s not super graphic, but its there so, please, read the warnings.
> 
> Warnings: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE READ:  
> Attempted rape/language/violence/mention of guns

 

“John.” My breath felt as if it were sucked from my body. I couldn’t breathe. I backed away from him, bumping into the counter. “But Tom…. You sounded like Tom…”

“He’s not the only one who can do impressions, darling. Something you might know about me if you paid more attention.”“ He drawled, in a pretty good impersonation of Tom’s voice. It made my skin crawl. He laughed, waving the gun. "I watched a bunch of videos of him doing interviews. All he does is talk. Talk, talk, talk, talk. Pretty easy to find material.”

_Oh my fucking God. Run! Scream! Do something! Don’t just stand there! Wait. Why isn’t Mitch freaking out?_

“Mitch! Mitch, baby! What the fuck did you do to my dog?” I gasped, turning quickly towards the snoring mound of fur on the floor. He was right by the door, but hadn’t moved a muscle. Not paying any mind to the insane man in the doorway with a gun still trained on me, I dropped to the floor in front of Mitch, ruffling his fur, shaking him.

“He’s fine. Stupid mutt. I left some of my mom’s meatloaf outside. With a few sleeping pills stuffed in it.” He said, laughing.

“I’m surprised he ate it. If I remember correctly, it tastes awful.” I said standing up. _Why the fuck did you say that? Oh my God, Rose! Shut the hell up!_

“Still with the smart ass mouth I see, Rose.” He said quietly, moving into the room and shutting the door. He locked it and put the chain lock on as well. I was trying to back away from him, but he drew the gun up, pointing it at me again. “Ah, ah, ah. No welcome home kiss? Didn’t you miss me?” I stared at him, no sure if he was joking. I backed up a few more steps, thinking if only I could get closer to the butcher block of knives on my counter. I might have a chance. John advanced a few steps closer.

“Answer me, Rose. Did you miss me? Did you think of me at all when you were laying on your fucking back for every guy that would give you the time of day? You are a god damn whore, Rose. Did you think that you could just walk away? Just do whatever you want? I’m going to make you understand that you can’t just leave me. We’re going to be so happy together. You’ll see.” He said. The worst part was that he wasn’t yelling. Yelling John I think I could have handled. I had gotten used to Yelling John over the years. This was creepy. Cool and Collected John scared the shit out of me. He was speaking as if we were talking about the weather. Completely calm.

“John, we aren’t together anymore. We broke up, almost a year ago. Don’t you remember?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. He blinked at me.

“Rose, stop saying that. Why does everyone keep saying that? I saw that fruit loop friend of yours, what’s his name? The fancy one that wears all the suits. He came right up to me and told me to leave you alone! How can I leave you alone when you’re my girl? Well. I took care of him, anyways. Never liked you hanging around with those two. Gave you ideas. I know that they had a lot to do with this foolishness.”

“You had something to do with Anthony’s car accident?” I gasped, stopping my slow creep down the edge of the counter, towards the knives.

“Pffff. Anthony. Yeah. That guy. Let’s just say it might have been hard for him to stop coming down that big hill his office is on.” He laughed.

_I’m going to be sick. He’s going after my friends. Oh my God. What if Tone was hurt? This is all your fault. No! Its all this mother fuckers fault! If he doesn’t kill me, I’m going to kill him myself!_ “John, I don’t know what you w-w-want from me.” I said, slightly mad at myself for the quaver in my voice. “Whatever you want, anything, just tell me and I’ll-” We heard the downstairs door open and close and quick footsteps on the stairs. John pointed the gun at the door and held his other hand up at me to silence me. Without thinking I moved between him and the door.

“John, please, I can make him go away. This is between us. Please.” I begged. He rolled his eyes at me but waived his hand at me, telling me to get on with it. The key turned in the lock and I ran over and  grabbed the tabloid off the table. I pulled the door open as far as the chain would allow.

“What do you want?” I asked, the edge in my voice causing Tom to draw back and the smile on his lips to falter.

“Rose? Are you alright? Darling, what’s wrong?” He asked, his brows drawn together. My heart broke at the confusion on his face. He was trying to see beyond me, into the kitchen.

“I don’t want to see you anymore!” I yelled, shoving the tabloid through the space. “You fucking lied to me! You’re with her! How could you, you bastard! Go away and never come back here!” I slammed the door in his face.

“Rose!” He yelled through the door, banging on it. “Rose, I told you-”

“Go away, Tom!” I interrupted him. "Please! Just go away and don’t come back! I never want to see you again!“ I sobbed, my heart disintegrating in my chest. _This is going to be the last time you see him and you’re breaking your own heart, even if you’re not breaking his. I hope he realizes. Please, Tom. Please understand. I_ pleaded silently. Silence met my cries. I rested my head against the door, listening. I didn’t hear him go down the stairs.

"Go, please.” I begged.

“Promises.” I could have sworn I heard him whisper, but the blood was pounding in my ears and I probably imagined it. “Fine! You know what? I don’t need this shit!” He yelled, stomping down the stairs. I almost laughed in relief. Turning, I found John watching me.

“Bravo! Such the little actress you’ve become.” He mocked my crying. “Please! Go! What a fucking pussy he is! ”Darling, what’s wrong?“ He imitated Tom again, making my stomach turn to acid. "Just letting you talk to him like that. He doesn’t really love you, Rose. If he did, he wouldn’t take that kind of back talk. I never let you talk to me that way, do I, Rose?” I stared at him. _He really has lost his fucking mind. Think, Rose. How the fuck are you going to get out of this?_

“N-no, John. I know better than to talk to you like that.” I said, edging towards the counter again. “Do you want some dinner? I can make you whatever you want.”

“You know what I want, Rose?” He said slowly, his eyes skimming down my silky dress and back up to my face. His tongue darted out and licked his lip. “You look good, baby. I want what’s mine. What belongs to me. What you’ve been giving away to everybody but me. You don’t think I know what you’ve been doing? I’ve seen you coming back here with him. I’m not as stupid as you think, Rose.”

_Shit, Rose. Just tell him what he wants to hear. Just make something up. Anything._

“I’m sorry, John. I don’t know why I did it. I wasn’t thinking. I missed you. I thought you didn’t want to be with me anymore. I thought of you, every time.” I said, practically gagging. I stepped back, bumping into the counter again.

He smiled at me and moved closer. He made to grab me and I reached blindly behind me, seizing the first knife I could wrap my hand around. I pulled it forward and skimmed it against the arm that reached out towards me. Then I darted away and down the hall.

“You fucking bitch!” He hissed, coming after me. He tripped on the corner of the counter and lunged out towards me, grabbing my ankle. I flew forward, sprawling face first onto the floor. His other hand came forward and gripped my calf. I kicked out with my other foot, connecting with his face. He let go and I heard the metallic clatter of the gun falling to the floor.

I scrambled forward on my hands and knees, managing to gain my feet again. Running into the spare bedroom, I tried to shut the door, but before I could close it, John pushed all his weight against it, shoving me back into the room. I fell back on my ass, the knife flying out of my hand.

“You. You are in so much trouble.” He seethed, advancing into the room and slamming the door shut behind him. I must have kicked him in the nose, because it was bent and bleeding profusely. I scuttled backwards, trying to get away from him. I looked around frantically for something to defend myself with. I tried to turn to get up, but he pushed me back down. John jumped on me, covering my body with his. I struggled, thinking at least I could scratch his fucking eyes out. I brought my knee up, connecting with his groin and causing him to curse violently and push down harder with his other knee on my thigh. He grabbed the wrist of the hand that was scratching his face and slammed it down to the ground over my head. His other hand snaked down my side, to the hem of my dress. The blood from his face was dripping on me, making me gag. My other arm was flung out to the side, trying to reach out and grasp anything that could possibly help me. I felt my hand wrap around something cool, rough and hard.

_Mitch, my darling boy. My sweet boy. Good dog. Very Good dog!_

I vaguely registered the sound of the glass on my kitchen door breaking and hurried footsteps coming down the hall. The door burst open. I looked over John’s shoulder at the tall silhouette in the doorway, feeling my heart fill with love.

_He came back._

“Rose! Get the hell off of her!” Tom growled, starting forward. John finally realized that we were not alone anymore and turned his head to see who had interrupted him. I took the opportunity and I swung my arm up, slamming the large rock onto the side of his head. The thud was sickening. His hand stilled at my hem. John went slack as he lost consciousness on top of me. I felt the bile rise up in my throat as I pushed at his heavy body.

Tom grabbed him and threw him to the side. I scrambled up and grasped his arms as he lifted me. He carried me from the room and I began to sob into his shoulder. He walked down the hall, just as a police officer came rushing into the kitchen.

“He’s in the back bedroom. Took you long enough to get here.” Tom shot at him. He sounded pissed, not at all like his usual, genial self. I snuggled deeper into his arms. He crossed the kitchen, the broken glass crunching under his feet. He slowly walked down the stairs, his arms holding me tightly. I buried my face into his neck, inhaling his scent. _Home._

“Rose. My love.” He buried his face in my hair, kissing my head. "My everything. I was so worried. I’m so sorry I took so long. I wanted to break down the bloody door, but when you shoved that fucking tabloid through it I knew you were warning me. I called the police, but they were taking too long. When I came back up, I couldn’t hear you anymore, I couldn’t wait. I’m so sorry, please forgive me. Who’s blood is this? Are you hurt? Darling, speak to me.“ He said, pulling me back to look at me. The look of concern on his face broke me like nothing else had during this horrible night.

"He tried to…tried to…said he was going to take what was his… but Mitch …. the rock garden…I hit him with a rock.” Was all I could manage, my voice punctuated by sobs. Tom’s stricken face was enough to send me into even harder sobs. He pulled me back to his chest, holding me so hard, it hurt.

“Oh God. Rose. Thank God. Thank God for that crazy dog and his damn rocks.” He said into my hair, his voice breaking a little. “I’m so sorry, my love. I should have gone in sooner. I should have broken down the damn door.” _He loves me. He cares about me. Is he for real? How did this happened?_

“Tom, he had a gun. He would have killed you! I’m the one who should be apologizing. He’s insane. He was going to shoot though the door when you first came up the stairs. He tried to kill Tone! Oh my God! I need to make sure he’s ok! He said that he cut his brakes. This is all my fault. All of this is because of me.” I cried into his coat.

I felt the cool air against my skin as he opened the downstairs door and walked out into the driveway. He walked over to his car and opened the passenger door, depositing me in it. Reaching over me, he turned the key and the engine purred to life. He cranked the heat up and took off his coat, laying it over my legs. Squatting down beside me, he took my hand. I looked down at our entwined fingers.

“Darling, this isn’t your fault!” He tilted my chin up with his free hand. “Look at me, Rose. You have done nothing wrong. You are the one that has been targeted and hurt in all of this. By that bastard. None of this has anything to do with anything that you’ve done. Please, don’t blame yourself. You never answered me, did he hurt you at all?”

I shook my head. Just then, the cavalry arrived. Two more police cars came flashing up the driveway, followed by an ambulance. The bus screeched to a halt behind Tom’s car. Martha flew out of the driver’s seat, practically breathing fire as she descended on us. Doug jumped out of the passenger seat, running into the building with the other officers.

“Hiddleston, you let me see that girl right now, or so help me God, I will destroy you!” She barked as she stopped next to him. I turned my head to look at her, a little smile coming to my lips, the tears finally slowing.

She would destroy him, too.

“Oh, my sweet girl! Are you hurt at all? Did that piece of shit hurt you?” She asked me, the angry bobcat fading instantly and the mother hen emerging. She dropped her bag next to Tom. “Come on, Toots, lets get you checked out.” She said, leaning into the car, over Tom, trying to help me out.

“Martha, I’m fine. When he grabbed me, I kicked him in the face. I think I broke his nose. It's his blood. He didn’t manage anything. Just a couple of bumps and bruises. Not even a good concussion.” I said, not letting go of Tom’s hand, but letting her lean in and hug me.

“Oh honey. When I heard the call, I panicked. I though the worst. You need to stop leading this new and exciting life! I don’t think my old heart can take it!” She laughed into my neck. I held my friend tight.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the trouble I’ve cause everyone.” I said quietly, as she pulled back.

“Sugar, you got nothing to do with this trouble. No. This is all on Captain Crazy Pants. Speaking of him, what happened?” She looked up as the officers all came running out of the building, followed by Doug, who was carrying my dog.

“Martha, George is hurt. He’s upstairs in the back bedroom. John got away. Out the damn window.” Doug came over to the car, grunting under the weight of Mitch. I froze, my hand tightening instinctively around Tom’s. He squeezed back reassuringly. Tom stood from his position crouching by the open car door and looked around as he opened the hatch for Doug to put the snoring dog in.

_It’s not over. It’s not fucking over. God damn it. When will this be over?_

Martha grabbed her bag and stood up to go tend to the injured officer, when Tom touched her arm.

“I need to get her away from here. Maybe a hotel?” He said quietly to her and Doug.

“Better yet. Take her to Alex and Anthony’s. We just came from there. They just got home. The more big, strong men around my little chicken while this mad fox is on the loose, the better. Me or Doug will call when this is all taken care of." Martha said heading towards the door.

"Hiddleston, you remember how I told you if you hurt her, I would cut you?” She asked over her shoulder, stopping just outside the door.

“Yes, Martha. It’s still pretty fresh in my memory.” He replied.

“Well, I take that back. I’m changing it to if you let that freak near her, I will cut you.” She gave him a look over her glasses, turned and went into the carriage house.

Tom shut my door and spoke to Doug briefly, then quickly went around to his side and got in. He turned to look at me.

“You’ve been so strong, darling. I’m so proud of you. You’ve done so well, and it’s almost over. We’re going to go to Alex’s. We can see how Anthony is. I promise you, I will do everything I can to keep you safe.” He said, reaching for my hand. I smiled sadly at him and nodded. It was easier than arguing with him.

He watched me closely for a moment, touching my cheek and leaning over and kissing my forehead.

“I love you, my darling Rose. I don’t know what I would have done if something had happened to you tonight. I’m sorry I wasn’t there sooner. If that bastard tries to come near you again, I swear, I’ll kill him with my bare hands.” He growled, his lips still brushing my forehead. I felt a thrill rush through me at his words. At the thought that someone would love me enough to want to protect me.

“Let’s go be unannounced house guests, love.” He said, giving me a smirk as he backed the car up and turned down the driveway.

We pulled up in front of Alex and Anthony’s little bungalow. The door opened as we were getting out of the car and Alex came hurrying down the front steps.

“Martha called. I’m so sorry, Rose! I shouldn’t have left! I would have been there when he showed up.” He grabbed me and crushed me to his massive chest. “Can you ever forgive me?”

“Oh, Alex!” I cried, feeling the tears well up into my eyes. “I’m sorry. It’s all my fault. John did something to Anthony’s car. He knew you would leave to go to him. He was waiting for you to leave. Is Anthony ok? I’m the one who should be begging for forgiveness!”

“I’m fine, Pipsqueak.” Anthony called from the door. I looked around Alex and he held up his arm, showing me a bright blue cast. “Wanna sign it? Come here.” Alex let me go and I ascended the stairs, meeting Anthony on the porch. He smiled at me and pulled me into a one armed hug.

“I’m fine. All in one piece, well, mostly.” He chuckled. "Don’t you blame yourself for what that asshole did. And look, we get to have a slumber party! I was just telling Alex to make some margaritas. Best to make it a double batch, honey.“ He said, ushering me into the house. We sat in the living room and ate junk food and drank margaritas. I told them what had happened, bursting into tears more than once. At one point, Tom had pulled me into his lap and rocked me, rubbing my back.

"Be still my heart, if that isn’t the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen in my life!” Anthony cried, breaking the tension.

We discussed where John could have gone, if we thought he would come back, and what to do if he did.

“I think you should get some pepper spray, or something. I thought for sure that Mitch would be enough protection, but it looks like he can’t be trusted. I knew whatever that shit he was eating wouldn’t sit well. I told him to drop it. Dopey mutt!” Alex said, looking fondly at the dog now snoring in front of the fireplace. He had woken up briefly and drank some water, then plopped down in his current spot and started to snore again.

“I wonder how long he’s going to be out for?” Anthony mused, reaching over and poking him. Nothing.

Doug called about an hour later, letting Tom know that they hadn’t found anything, but that they would let us know any information as it became available. Tom hung up the phone, looking tired.

“You two need sleep. We all need sleep!” Anthony said, bouncing up from the couch. “I hope you like princesses, Tom.” He said, leading us up the stairs to the spare bedroom. He opened the door and flipped on the light. I watched Tom’s expression, because I knew what the décor was. His jaw dropped. The whole room was pink. Everything in it was either sparkly, had a princess on it or a unicorn. It looked like the inside of I Dream Of Genie’s lamp. Swaths of filmy fabric hung artfully from the center of the ceiling to the walls. Pink and gold mini Chinese lanterns were strung along the headboard of the double twin sized bed that had a pink and green quilt covering it.

“My niece would kill to have this room!” He exclaimed, turning around to inspect the bedazzled vanity that sat in the corner. “Who’s the lucky lady who resides here? Or is this Rose’s room when she stays the night?” Anthony laughed as Alex poked his head in to check on us.

“Yeah, it’s a bit much, but it makes my little sister happy when she comes to stay. These will have to do.” He said, tossing some pajamas on the bed.

“Thank you guys so much for letting us stay here. I would have understood if you didn’t want anything to do with me after what happened tonight. I’m so sorr-” Anthony cut me off by pulling me into a hug.

“Shut it, Pipsqueak. I’m not going over this again. You belong here with us, where us manly men can protect you. That and the three cops sitting in the driveway. Goodnight guys.” He said, letting me go and shutting the door behind him on the way out.

I turned to Tom and he held his arms out to me. I went to him, like a moth to flame. His long arms held me, and he just slowly swayed back and forth. I was emotionally and physically exhausted, and he seemed to sense it. Eventually, he guided me over to the bed, pulling my dress over my head.

“Darling, I know it’s not the time, but this I like.” He said, a cheeky grin on his face as he motioned to my black lacy underthings. I swatted at him, but giggled. I pulled a t-shirt that came to my knees over my head and climbed into the bed, curling up on my side. Tom striped down and pulled a pair of pajama pants on, climbing in behind me, pulling me back into him. I sighed in contentment as he gently ran his hand up and down my arm, sometimes trailing his fingers across my neck and up to my forehead, and others down my hip and to my thigh. He repeated this motion over and over until I drifted off to sleep.

Waking in his arms in the too small bed the next morning, my first thought was that I had managed to make it through the night without a nightmare. My next thought was how the fuck was that possible? After what had happened the night before I had fully expected to be back on the foggy path as soon as I closed my eyes. Not wanting to think about it, I snuggled deeper into his warmth and sighed. He hugged me to him, groaning as he stretched against me. He burrowed his face against my neck.

“I really don’t want to get up. But duty calls. Or the director. One of those.” He murmured.

“What? It’s New Years Day!” I exclaimed, propping myself up on my elbow to look at him. He gave me a warm smile, puling me closer, his lips brushing mine.

“I know, darling, but I can’t help the shooting schedule. It shouldn’t be a long day. Just a scene or two. Do you really want me to stay? I can call out sick? Can’t have me all runny nosed on camera, wouldn’t look good on the big screen!” He chuckled. HIs hand skimmed my thigh, making me want to jump on him.

“No. I don’t want you to get in trouble. I’ll be fine. Tone and Alex are here. We’ll watch old movies and eat crap. It’ll be great.” I said miserably. He smirked at me and jumped up from the bed, throwing on his clothes from the day before. Kissing me goodbye, he left, shutting the door behind him. I tried to go back to sleep, but I was scared that if I did, I would have the nightmare that I was so grateful to have been spared from the night before. Throwing back the covers, I padded out to the living room. It was quiet.

_Tone and Alex must still be asleep._ I thought, wandering into the kitchen, searching for the coffee. I was digging in a cabinet when my purse started ringing on the table. I grabbed it before Here Comes the Sun woke them up.

It was Norma and Sarah’s number.

“Happy New Year!” I said, more cheerful than I felt as I leaned against the counter.

“Rosie?” Asked a small voice.

“Sarah? Is that you?” I asked, standing up straight. Something didn’t sound right.

“Oh Rosie! I’m so glad you picked up! Is Teddy with you? I need to speak to him.” She asked.

“Sarah, honey, where’s Norma?” I asked her.

“She’s in the bedroom. The nice man said that she was too loud and that he was going to put her to bed. Is Teddy coming home?” She asked.

“What do you mean, the nice man? Sarah, who’s there? Is there someone there with you?” I was trying to stay calm, but it was hard when your heart just dropped on the floor.

“Oh, yes, he came for breakfast. He said that he is a friend of Teddy’s, from the war. Rosie, why did he get to come home, but Teddy is still there?” I could hear someone in the background, asking her to give him the phone.

“Hello, Rose.” It was John. My mind screamed. He was at Sarah and Norma’s house. _He had done something to Norma. Fuck._

“What have you done? If you hurt so much as one hair on their heads, I swear-” I didn’t get to finish, because he cut me off.

“You listen carefully, Rose. I know that all your bodyguards are watching you like hawks. I don’t care how you do it, but you get your ass over here, and do it quick, or that loud mouth one is going to be joining her dear brother. And don’t call Deputy Dipshit. I’ve got the scanner on, I’ll know.” The line went dead.

I looked around, at a loss. What the fuck was I going to do? Not pausing to think, I quietly, but quickly, went back to the bedroom and pulled on the pair of sweats that Tom had just vacated. I looked out the side window, there was one cruiser on the street. Squinting, I could see that the officer had his head lolled to the side. He was asleep.

_What are the fucking odds? Ugh, Don’t fucking do this Rose! But he’s got them! I can’t. Just shut up! I can’t think with you two arguing in there!_ I yelled internally. I opened a text to Tom.

_This is why I don’t make promises. I love you. So much. Please understand. Please forgive me._

I grabbed Alex’s keys and quietly left out the side door.

 


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language/mild violence
> 
> This is it! I hope you enjoyed it.. please let me know!
> 
> xoxo  
> Nuggsmum

 

“Seriously, Alex? Can this piece of shit not go above 40mph?” I yelled as I whipped around a corner, the tires making a screeching noise. I was trying to get to Sarah and Norma’s house a quickly as possible. After last night, who knew what state of mind John was in. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I knew that I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to them because of me. I pulled into their driveway, threw the car in park and jumped out. I ran up the walk and into the house.

Sarah was sitting in her chair in the parlor, with a cup of tea in her hands. John was sitting on the sofa, across from her.

“Oh, Rosie! What a nice surprise! Come in and have a seat. Would you like some tea? This is Mr…. er, Mr….” She trailed off, looking at John, as if just realizing she had no idea who he was.

“It’s ok Sarah. Are you ok?” I asked, moving towards her. John jumped up and waved a gun at me.

“That didn’t take very long. How did you get here?” He asked, going to the window and looking out front. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

“I stole Alex’s car. You told me to get here quickly, where’s Norma? I want to see her.” I demanded. He stared at me, like he couldn’t believe that I had actually come.

“She’s fine. We have to leave. They’re going to come looking for you soon, we need to get out of here.” He came towards me and I stepped back. He reached out and grabbed my arm hard and pulled me into him.

“Oh, no. My darling Rose. You’re not getting away from me now. I told you that I would make you come back to me.” He leaned in to kiss me and I pulled back. “You fucking bitch!” He slapped me across the face, making me fall on the ground. Sarah screamed, trying to get up.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I just wasn’t expecting it!” I cried, holding my hand to my face. _That had fucking hurt._ John had turned his gun on Sarah.

“Sarah, sit down honey, it’s ok. I’m ok.” I said to her, trying to think. _What the fuck was I going to do. I had to get him out of here before one of them got hurt._

John pulled me up by my arm. He pushed me towards the door, but I turned around and placed my hands on his chest.

“John, please, let me check on Norma before we go. I promise I will go wherever you want, willingly. I’ve missed you so much.” I leaned into him and kissed him. _I’m going to fucking vomit. I’m going to fucking vomit!_ Was all I could think, but he seemed to believe me because he smiled. _The mother fucker smiled._

“Ok, but hurry up. I want to get out of here.” He said, sitting down on the sofa again.

I quickly moved down the hall to Norma’s room. I threw open the door, and she was sitting on the bed, her hands and legs bound and a piece of tape across her mouth. I ran over to her and slowly peeled the tape back.

“Jesus Christ, Rose! What the fuck are you doing here? You shouldn’t have come! You know that he’s insane!” She hissed at me.

“Shhh. I’m so sorry, Norma. I’m going to get him to leave with me-”

“Oh, no you don’t! Rose, look at me, do not leave with him. He will kill you. He’s a fucking nut bag. Off his god damn rocker! He kept talking about you like you were going to fall into his arms with gratitude when you saw him. He’s bat shit crazy.” She said, looking towards the door.

“It’s the only way, Norma.” I said as I untied her hands. I could hear him coming down the hall. “Quick, put your hands back so it looks like your still tied.” I whispered.

“Oh, Rose-” She said quickly, but the door was thrown open and John was standing there.

“See, the crazy old bitch is fine. I didn’t hurt her.” He said in a mocking tone. I turned and smiled at him, feeling the bile rise in my throat.

“Are you ready hun?” I asked, standing up from the bed and walking over to him. He looked skeptical for a moment, but I tentatively reached out and put my hand on his chest. It made my skin crawl.

“Yeah, lets go.” He said, turning to leave the room.

“John? Lets go to the cabin! We haven’t been there in ages! Wouldn’t it be nice to sit by the fire, and get, ah, reacquainted?” I asked him.

_Jesus, Rose, keep a straight face. Do not throw up. Make him believe it._ I was thinking, dying inside.

“Yeah, the cabin…. Ok. What? Mr. Hollywood wasn’t man enough to do it right? You missed being with a real man, huh?” He asked, grabbing my ass as we walked down the hall. I covered a gag with a cough.

“Oh, baby. He couldn’t even begin to be compared to you.” I simpered, _Is he really buying this shit? I hope Norma remembers that bit about the cabin. Maybe they can at least find my body. Stop it, Rose!_  
I grabbed Norma’s keys and headed toward the front door, pulling him with me.

“I knew you regretted leaving me.“ He smirked as we got into the car. He insisted that I drive, so he could keep his gun available, incase I had a change of heart. I pulled out of the drive, and noticed a big, old pickup truck parked a few houses down. It pulled out into the street and followed us to the corner.

I was trying to pay attention to what John was rambling about, he was saying something about his mother, and how she didn’t think that I would be a good mother, because I never too good enough care of him, of his needs. I nodded in agreement, because I was busy watching the truck. I turned onto the highway, trying to go as slow as I could, but at Johns insistence, I sped up. The truck fell behind.

“Don’t you think it would be better if we took a back road? More scenic.” I said.

“Sure.” He said. He seemed to be calming down, now that he really thought that I wanted to be with him. I slowed way down, before the off ramp, hoping the old truck could keep up. As I was taking a left off the end of the off ramp, about to lose hope, I saw it in the rear view. _Oh, thank you God!_ I drove down the road, the truck was careful to stay far enough behind as not to be noticed. Suddenly, the car started to sputter, and died.

“What did you do?” John yelled.

“No-nothing! It just stopped working!” I cried, as I steered it to the side of the road. I tried to turn the ignition, but it would not start. I chanced a look at John, and he did not look happy.

“Get out of the fucking car. Lets go. Now!” He yelled. I scrambled out of the car and around to the side of the car. He grabbed my arm and started walking towards the woods. I tried to pull my arm free, but he just pushed the gun into my side.

“I don’t know what you did, but you’re going to regret this. Do you think I’m fucking stupid? That was always your problem, you know that? You think that you’re so much smarter than everyone. You and your fucking books. Come on, move, damnit!” He yelled, pushing me further into the woods.

“John, please, don’t do anything crazy. I promise, I want to be with you!” I tried, earning myself a particularly ruthless push, that made me trip and fall onto the path. I lay there, contemplating what I was going to do.

It was starting to get foggy, and we weren’t on a path, just trudging through the brush. There was the sound of snapping twigs just out of our visual field, and John turned, studying the wall of fog. I slowly climbed back to my feet and backed away from him. He was still looking towards the noise, so I turned and began running.

“God damn it!” He yelled and I could hear him crashing after me. I ran through bushes and jumped over logs, my pants snagging on thorns. I couldn’t see more than three feet in front of me, and I chanced a look over my shoulder and I couldn’t see anything behind me either. Suddenly, the ground disappeared from beneath my feet and I pitched forward, my arms flailing out in front of me. I tumbled down a hill, crashing through bushed and coming to rest against a large tree at the bottom of the hill. I was trying to struggle to my feet, and I looked up into the barrel of John’s gun.

_What am I going to do? Try to fight him? Probably not, I’ll just end up getting shot. Try to run again? Shot. Lie and tell him I love him? Judging by that look on his face, I’d get shot twice._ I just sighed in resignation.

“Here’s as good a place as any, I guess. I told you. I fucking told you and you didn’t believe me. I told you that I would teach you to respect me. You fucking ruined everything. We were happy. You were happy. You just didn’t know it. You thought were too good. You thought that you were better than me.”

“John, please…” I cried, tears streaming down my face.

_This is it. I’m never going to see Tom again. I’m never going to be able to explain. To tell him I love him again. To tell him I’m sorry._

“Do you really want to do that?” Came a voice from behind me. _No fucking way…I’ve gone crazy and I’m hallucinating._ I thought. John had been focused on me, and didn’t hear him approach us. He lifted the gun so that it was now pointing over my head. I turned slowly on my knees.

Tom.

He had his hands up and his eyes locked on John. _What the fuck is he doing? He's going to get shot._

“Tom…” I said.

“Be quite, Rose. Men are talking.” He snapped, not looking at me. John blinked hard, and motioned towards me with the gun.

“She’s not worth the trouble you’re gonna get from coming out here, Hollywood. Why would you bother?” He asked, and he seemed genuinely curious.

“She’s a bitch. She used me, just like she used you. I came here for you, man. I didn’t want you to waste your life on this whore! You kill her, and you’re going away for life. She’s not worth it. She’s been nothing but a thorn in my side since I met her. I understand where you’re coming from. How dare she leave you? Make a fool out of you in front of your friends? I wouldn’t want to let her get away with it either. But think about the consequences. Is some small town slut really worth a life time sentence?" Tom drawled. I could not believe what I was hearing.

_He couldn’t… He didn’t really mean those things, did he? Oh my ever loving god, Rose! Stop being such a dumbass! Of course he doesn’t fucking mean it! He’s trying to get into his head. He’s trying to save your stupid ass!_ I yelled in my head. I was looking back and forth from my place on the forest floor. John definitely looked confused.

Tom was inching closer to me, still talking to John about how awful I was.

“No. No. I know what you’re doing. It’s not going to work. She thought that she could get away with the same thing. Try to get on my side, try to fool me. I SAID NO!” He screamed, waving the gun at Tom, raising it toward him.

“No!” I cried, trying to get to John, trying to get in between them. I heard the gunshot and I was pushed into the ground by someone falling on me.

“Tom! No, no, no, no! Tom, please. Please, Tom!” I screamed, trying to push him off of me so I could see him. I heard groaning, but it wasn’t coming from on top of me, it was coming from John. The weight was lifted off of me, and Tom pulled me into his arms.

“Oh, God. Tom!” I choked on my tears, running my hands over his chest to make sure he was ok.

“Shhh. I’ve got you, Darling. My irrational, insane girl. I’ve got you. You’re safe. You’re safe. Thank God, you’re safe. You’re safe. You’re safe. You’re safe.” He said, almost to himself, like a mantra.

“You kids ok?” I heard the General call, as he came quickly limping out of the woods. “Ha! Got the bugger in the shoulder! Losing my touch! I was aiming for his dick.” He said, shaking his head. I looked over at John, on the ground, with blood pooling around him. I pulled away from Tom, and started towards him. Tom grabbed my arm.

“He’s going to bleed out if we don’t stop the bleeding. I hate him, but I can’t just let him die. I want him to be alive and well when he sits in the jail cell for the rest of his fucking life.” I said. Tom nodded and let go of me. He came over with me and kicked the gun further away, not that he would have been able to use it. His shoulder was a mess.

“I think he's going into shock.” I said, ripping a piece of my giant t-shirt off, wadding it and pushing it into his shoulder, causing him to cry out in pain.

“Well, you shouldn’t have tried to kill us, you stupid fuck.” I snapped at him, as I pushed harder.

“There’s my Rosie.” Chuckled the General. I could hear people calling our names, and the General yelled to them where we were.

“Oh, my sweet Miss Thing. What have you gotten into now? I swear, I’m going more gray by the minute with you and all your nonsense.” I heard Martha from behind me. She had arrived with Doug and about 6 other police officers. Tom pulled me up and into his arms, hugging me tight.

“Rose, you know that I didn’t mean-” I cut him off.

“I know. I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine what you went through.” I said, reaching up and kissing his lips.

“I love you so much. I am so mad at you right now, but I am so relieved that you are alright. Are you hurt at all?” He asked.

“I’m fine. Are Norma and Sarah ok?” I asked him.

“You can ask Norma yourself, she’s in my cruiser out on the road.” Doug said, coming over. “Jesus, Rosie. Never a dull moment for you, eh?” He shook his head, watching Martha and her partner load John onto the stretcher.

“My life had been very dull until about a week and a half ago.” I said, leaning into Tom. “How did you guys find me?” I asked, looking up into Tom’s face. He looked down at me, pressing his lips into a thin line. _Shit, he’s really not pleased with me._

“Well, it just happened that I was on my way back, the director called and cancelled shooting today. I was going to surprise you, when you sent me that lovely text.” He said, narrowing his eyes.

“I’m sorry. I panicked. He had Norma and Sarah, and I couldn’t have lived with myself if he had hurt them…”

“I know, Darling. I just wish that you had called me, or called Doug. Told Alex or Anthony, who were beside themselves when they figured out that you were gone. I got to their house probably 5 minutes after you left. Alex had just come outside, he was pulling his hair out. Then the General called, saying that you passed him, and nearly flipped Alex’s car on a corner, you were going so fast." Tom said, squeezing me closer to him.

“Which was pretty impressive, considering that junker he drives!” The General added, chuckling.

“Since my car tends to, ah, stand out, around here, we took his truck, and parked it down the street. We called Doug, but you guys left before he got there, so we followed you. Norma called her GPS company and they shut the car down remotely.”

“Ah, I was wondering why it conveniently died on side of the road. Tom, I’m so sorry. I have been nothing but trouble since you met me.” I said, paraphrasing his words from earlier.

“Shh. Please, the things I said, it was just nonsense, I didn’t mean any of that. I thought if I could distract him long enough to get to you… all I could think of was getting to you. Its over now. Come on, darling. Lets go home.” He said, guiding me out of the woods.

When we emerged from the woods, Norma was waiting.

“Oh, Jesus! Thank god!” She cried, hugging me. “And you, my dear man! You, come here!” She grabbed Tom and practically climbed him. “You saved her. I will forever be thankful to you for this. You just may deserve her yet. If you keep up all this knight in shining armor shit, we might just allow you to keep her.” She said, winking at him.

“I think the General had a lot to do with it, too.” Tom said, and the General smiled at him, as Normal turned her assault on him.

“They would make a cute couple.” He murmured in my ear.

When we got home, Tom suggested just getting take out. I was all for that. While he was gone, I put on yoga pants and a baggy sweatshirt. There was a knock at the door.

“Who is it?” I called, as I went into the kitchen. Even though I knew that John was in the hospital under police custody, I was still sketched out.

“Rose, you are in a boat load of trouble. Open this damn door, Right. Now.” Alex called from the other side of the door.

_Oh, fuck. I never called him!_ I thought, panicking. I pulled open the door, and he was standing there, with Anthony, Martha, and Doug. He pulled me into a hug, lifting me off my feet.

“Thank God you’re ok, you pain in the ass. I think I aged 20 years when I finally realized you had left. What the fuck, Rose!?” He said, shaking his head.

“Oh, leave her alone, you big bear. She did what she thought she had to do. Was it unbelievably stupid? Yes. Should she never be allowed to forget how faulty her decision making skills are? Yes. Should she have to bring you lunch for a year to make up for it? Yes. But, for tonight, lets just let it go.“ Anthony said, putting his hand on Alex’s shoulder.

“Faulty is one way to put it.” Tom said from the doorway, he was holding two large bags of takeout. "Hope you don’t mind, I thought you could use some friends. The proper way to celebrate the new year, love.” He said as he placed the food on the counter.

“Thank you.” I said, kissing his chin.

“Alright, there, you two, enough of that shit. If I don’t get a glass of wine, I’m going to hurt somebody.” Alex said.

It was just what I needed. A night with good food and wine, close friends and the man I loved.

As I sat on the edge of the bed putting my hair into a braid, after everyone had left, I watched Tom getting ready for bed.

“I love you.” I said to him. He stopped digging in his bag and smiled at me.

“I love you, too, darling.” He said.

“When I thought that he was going to kill me, you were my first thought. Or would have been my last thought. I know that this has been crazy, and whirlwind, and so fast, but I can’t imagine life without you now.” I said, feeling my eyes start to sting, as I pulled my knee up to my chest. He came to me and sat next to me on the bed, pulling me into his lap.

“Darling, I love you to distraction, even though, as you said, this had been so quick. I don’t want to imagine life without you. Would you believe it if I told you the best thing I ever did was give into a craving for pecans?” He laughed, pulling me closer, and kissing me.

I think pecans would always have a special place in my heart.

**Epilogue**

My midnight blue ball gown billowed around me in the back seat of Anthony’s car. I clutched my small bag in my hand as Alex reached in to help me out. I patted my hair and took his proffered arm. I saw flashing lights off to the left.

“What the?” I said turning to see a group of photographers, snapping pictures of me.

“Shit, Rose! You’ve been found out!” Anthony hooted.

“No, you don’t think they are here for me?” I asked, then they started calling my name.

“Oh, for crying out loud!” I said, hurrying inside.

“Well, at least we’re all looking fine for our tabloid debut.” Alex chuckled.

“Aren’t you glad I made you get a new tux?” Anthony shot at him, he just rolled his eyes.

We crossed the lobby, and entered the ballroom. It had been done in a winter wonderland theme. It sparkled everywhere. We located our table, several of our friends were already there, including Norma and Sarah, and the General, looking dashing in his dress uniform. The General asked me to dance, and we were slowly waltzing around the dance floor, when I saw him. Standing in the doorway, looking unbelievable in a classic black tux, was Tom. He was scanning the room. His eyes fell on me and he grinned, waggling his eyebrows at me.

“He’s a good man, Rosie.” Said the General quietly.

I tore my gaze from Tom to look up into his face. “I know, I’m very lucky.” I said.

“You’re both lucky. Listen to me, sweetheart. I don’t care what you have to do to make this work, because your definitely going to have to make compromises, but whatever it is, you do it. You kids were meant to be.” He said gruffly.

Before I could think of a response, Tom materialized at the Generals elbow, asking if he could cut in.

“Sarah was right, darling.” He said, his eyes taking over my dress. “You look ravishing in blue. I guess this is sort of like the prom.” He laughed.

“I was secretly hoping that you would take me to the prom, so I guess I got my wish.” I said.

“Does this mean I’ll get lucky in the backseat of my dad’s car tonight?” He asked.

“Not in this dress! But I’m pretty sure something can be arranged.” I smiled, wrapping my hand around the back of his neck and pulling him into a kiss.


End file.
